No wonder I dont go anywhere or do much...

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by BEARANDBUGSMOM, Feb 10, 2007.

  1. BEARANDBUGSMOM

    BEARANDBUGSMOM New Member

    I quit my job 4 years ago to be a stay at home mom and I never went back to visit. You know how it goes you want to go back but you feel terrible and I have gained weight and so on...

    My coworkers called me Friday and let me know that a coworker had died. I went to the funeral today and I felt okay with it, maybe a little nervous to see all my old coworkers.

    Now I know why I dont do much anymore, I guess I dont really fell the stress at the time but my body tells me later,....I feel like someone has hit me with a mack truck..I came home so tired and I had to go to bed and I had a terrible headache...

    Not to mention it's terrible to try to tell your old co-workers whats wrong with you and why you dont get together and visit much anymore....they give you that look like well you look good...!! You don't look sick! AARRHH!

    I want to go out and be friendlier but lately, I don't have any control over this crash feeling and it's started to really bother me.

    By the way I haven't bee on the board in a long time and I miss all of you and I will try to be here more often!

    Thanks and blessings,
    Kelly
  2. Mini4Me

    Mini4Me New Member

    I totally understand how you're feeling. I have not done anything with my ex-co-workers since I went out on disability. It would be just too stressful and would almost certainly send me into an instant flare.
    Hope you're better now.
    Mini
  3. llama

    llama New Member

    Hi Bearandbugsmom,

    I can totally relate to your reluctance to be around old co-workers. I still talk on the phone to a couple of people, but haven't seen them in about 2.5 years. I too have gained some weight, although a lot of family members are always telling me that I look so healthy and RESTED!!

    I just feel uncomfortable around them, b/c of course they don't understand. They keep asking me if I'm going to come back to work there or anywhere..lol I've even had some people (ones who have talked behind my back) act kind of snooty...they think I'm rich and don't have to work!!

    I've not told any of these people that I'm desperately waiting to hear from SSDI, as to when my ALJ hearing will be. I'm rich all right...!!

    The few times that I've gone out socially even with just "old" friends, I too have gone into a flare afterwards. I seem to do better with people that I've met since I've become ill. I guess lowered expectations..lol

    Good Luck to you.........Jill...........
  4. dancingstarheart

    dancingstarheart New Member

    I also hate hearing, "You look great" went I feel so lousy. I think the only one that could tell that I wasn't feeling good, was my Mom. She said there was a certain look to my eyes.

    One of the most frustrating part of this disease is most people don't know how to relate, so they look for things to cheer you up and end up saying the corniest things... like get more sleep and you will feel better.

    It is best to have the expectation that most will never understand what you are going through because they have never experienced it themselves. I get through it by relying on the Lord, my Mom's understanding (she had fibro), and my husband's sympathy.

    I know the loneliness of wanting to be with friends, but not have the energy to do things with them. I guess that has given my time to grow closer to God.

    Maybe the best way to deal with not having the energy to see friends, is to relinquish your control of the matter. Pray for an opportunity to spend time with one friend, and maybe that is the first step.

    I hope I have been helpful in some way.
    -Trace

  5. BEARANDBUGSMOM

    BEARANDBUGSMOM New Member

    I really appreciate your kind words and it always helps soo much to hear from folks who understand and know how this feels.

    Thanks and blessings,
    Kelly