OT Do you feel a distinct purpose for your life?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by shootingstar, Jul 5, 2006.

  1. shootingstar

    shootingstar New Member

    Over the July 4th holiday I had the privilege of spending time with some people who seem to have had a feeling of purpose their whole lives. They seemed comfortable with themselves and others, could look back on many successes etc.

    I, on the other hand, have never had any sense of why in the world I might be here. I seem to have set off in many directions, rolled with the flow, taken a stand now and then, but basically left a trail of not much significant behind. When does the light come on?! I'm curious to know how many of you have felt a life-long sense of purpose.
  2. gnanny

    gnanny New Member

    I have always kidded around and said I dont know what I want to be when I grow up.

    any day now would be great....
  3. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    are lucky. They know what they want to do when they are kids. They start early. They grow up and work at what they love.

    Most of us have to work just to survive.

  4. lovethesun

    lovethesun New Member

    a Diffence.One of my sister's friends wrote that she always remebered my smile and that changed the day sometimes for her.I just try to make people feel good about themselves(most of the time,I'm not perfect)I guess it is all about what your defination of purpose in life is.Linda
  5. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    I have never had a sense of destiny or specific purpose. I think some families encourage children to find a purpose, some don't, and some people just seem born to something.

    A lot of people think they should project a sense of purpose and success but they may be feeling very insecure inside. Someone who lives a life of purpose can suddenly find it shallow and suffer an identity crisis. Someone else can go with the flow and suddenly find a new purpose in life.

    I don't think we can compare ourselves with others. One of the things which makes life interesting is that we really don't know what is around the corner.

    After five years of not being able to work, I am feeling restless and like I need more in my life than I presently have. I've worked very hard to get my health to the point where I can work part time. I've done everything I ever wanted to do, so I don't really have a fire in my belly to achieve anything. I would very much like to find a real sense of purpose beyond just existing. Still, I try to find the beauty in everyday life and be thankful for what I have.

    It's the age old question: "Is this all there is?"

    Love, Mikie
  6. jole

    jole Member

    I don't think there is necessarily one thing each of us "needs" to do, but I do feel strongly that each of us has a duty to leave this world a better place by our presence here.

    We have each been blessed with gifts specific to us, and they need to be used. If we're fortunate enough to be rich, I think we MUST help out someone financially. My sister has a great sense of humor, and can make others feel better by just being around her for 10 minutes! To me that is one of the most wonderful gifts of all!!

    Whatever it is, we need to use it for the good of others. My husband is a farmer, and it is his duty to leave the land better than when he got it --I was a nurse for years, and feel I helped many people with a smile and encouraging word along with knowledge, etc.

    My neice home schools her children, and they are wonderful, respectful children. What a gift!!

    So many different ways to share what has been given to us!

    Friends - Jole
  7. jake123

    jake123 New Member

    I definitely believe we all have a purpose in life which God has given us. I am a teacher and I love my job working with kids who have been expelled from their schools. I don't preach to them but when an occasion arises, I will say something.
    Sometimes we sit as a group with a long cord and one person will talk as long as they are moving the cord in their hands. They can talk about family, boys, girls, troubles, going back to school, I have a turn also. Kids need to talk and be heard.
  8. I have always wondered the same thing. Life seems to be passing by so quickly and I feel so insignificant in this world. I just try to be a good , nice person, treating others like I would like others to treat me and just enjoy life the best I can.
  9. lurkernomore

    lurkernomore New Member

    I started out in life thinking my number one purpose was to be a wife and a mother. So I married my love and eventually, we had two boys. A few years later, when my sons were still toddlers, I realized that I had let one dream slip and that was nursing school, so I applied and began in the program.

    When I was about 21/2 months from graduating, I had to drop out because my younger son had a congenital problem with his legs which required so many hours of PT a day I simply could not fit it all in and keep my grades up as well. So I did what any mama would do, and dropped out, thinking I would return in the fall.

    But that was when I got the flu that never ended, and so I never returned to nursing school. I have no regrets as my son was saved from having to have more surgery on his legs and although he wore braces on them for a few years, he now walks fairly well and I am so thankful for that.

    My husband is a real "doer" in the church and is a deacon, SS administrator, mission leader and other things I cannot even think of right now. So when the children were younger, we sort of agreed that I would facilitate his ability to be present to do his church duties by my staying home with the boys when they were ill or unable to go.

    Now, as I said before, the boys have grown and I could be there with him more and I still feel almost like the "ghost wife" at church. I am absent more than I am there, because of the fibro and CFS, osteoarthritis, SVF and diabetes.

    But I do feel as if I have had purpose to my life as we have two really good young men for sons, I believe I have helped so that hubby could fullfill his obligations at church and been there for him. So now, I am sort of seeking out a new purpose, I suppose, one just for me.

    I have no idea right now what that may be just yet. I may be somewhat limited, physically, but spiritually, I just feel that there is still some journey out there that I am meant to go down, some road I have not travelled and I am a little excited and curious to see what life holds for me next.

    Oh, I forgot to mention that I have also held down a few jobs throughout this, some good, some nightmares, but I have never equated work with my purpose in life. I feel that a purpose holds a much more important plan than just working and getting by.
  10. Marta608

    Marta608 Member

    I haven't had a sense of purpose as in curing disease or creating world peace - althought I sure hope someone has - but I've always felt that I was here for a reason. When my sons were young I thought that being their mother was my purpose.

    When I worked, I thought my purpose was to be a problem-solver, to Do, to make things happen. Then, oops. Along came CFS, a problem not only I but no one else seems able to solve. I began to doubt myself but then I realized that even illness can be part of the big picture.

    In spite of it or maybe because of it I've learned to listen more, to judge less, to see and appreciate more of my world, and since I can no longer jump, I no longer jump to conclusions either. I'm more accepting, less impulsive.

    I personally believe we're all here to learn and grow and to expand spiritually so I must say I've certainly had a lot of opportunity to do that! As for purpose, I think that's it.

    Hmmmmm. I wonder if perhaps our real purpose isn't just to live, to love, to do our best - to "be all that we can be" -within our little inch of dirt, in spite of it all.

    Marta
    [This Message was Edited on 07/06/2006]
  11. carebelle

    carebelle New Member

    I believe That we can achieve that purpose and not know until we pass thu it. Maybe it was in Gods plan ,that I lived and worked at a certain place in a certain time in my life. That my presence made a difference in someones life.

    I do know God has given me so many blessings and opportunities for things that not everyone gets to do. One really Big Honor I've had was several years ago I was ask twice to Lay a wreath at the Tome of the Unknown Soldier.

    Being a military wife I treasure that honor. I've been able to meet several Congress men and women and held conversation with them about things I felt important. But I do not think that has been why I am here on earth.

    That is a great question. I tend to believe that we may find out the purpose after we leave this world. We all touch the life's of people everyday. We may not know just how much we helped someone. I know even with this board several of you have been such a blessing to me.

    My purpose? To never stop looking for one. To be a really good human being. To love unconditionally. To find humor in all things .To dry the tears of a child. To be my husbands partner .To be my children's mother.To be a dreamer. To help when others turn a way. To give a hug when someone has never had one.

    To fill in ,where human hands are needed. To have faith when it doesn't seem like anyone else does. To be a real friend when someone doesn't know what that is. I guess my favorite prayer sums it all up for me. My purpose is to believe it and live it.

    The Serenity Prayer

    GOD, grant me the serenity

    to accept the things
    I cannot change,
    Courage to change the

    things I can, and the
    wisdom to know the difference.



  12. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    I have also looked at Budhism and like the idea of enlightenment through just being still, meditating and letting it come to me. In Psalms, it says, "Be still and know that I am God." I like that and it gives me comfort. Depok Chopra quotes that in his book on spiritual success. He also says to tell yourself that everything is exactly as it should be. That is comforting when things are rought and we want change.

    Love, Mikie
  13. lenasvn

    lenasvn New Member

    in the eyes of eternity has nothing to do with achievements. The one who have left the biggest impression in my life, changed me forever. It had nothing to do with his achievments, it had to do with his simple person and the love he gave- my step dad (passed 5 years ago 54 years young).

    That, I think was his purpose, to give people that special feeling in their hearts. That is the greatest achivement I can think of. I don't think he ever felt that this was his purpose. I don't know if he ever really thought in those directions.

    We live our purpose right here, right now, and we may not know what it is, but we are fullfilling it.
  14. TAM

    TAM New Member

    HI,
    I THINK THESE PEOPLE MIGHT HAVE THERE SENSE OF PURPOSE A LITTLE MIXED UP. YOU CAN'T MEASURE YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE BY SUCCESS, WEALTH, OR ANYTHING MATERIAL. I'M SURE YOU HAVE ALWAYS HAD A GREAT PURPOSE IN YOUR LIFE. YOU JUST DON'T REALIZE IT BECAUSE I'M SURE YOUR LIKE ME AND YOU CAN'T DO HALF THE THINGS YOU USED TO DO AND ENJOY BECAUSE OF FIBRO, SO WE TEND TO JUDGE OURSELEVES AS WORTHLESS AND WERE NOT.
    WE MIGHT FEEL LIKE WE REALLY DON'T BELONG OR WE HAVE'NT SEREVED A PURPOSE.

    I BELIEVE YOU HAVE SERVED A LIFE LONG PURPOSE WHEN YOU CAN GO TO BED AT NIGHT KNOWING YOU WERE KIND TO OTHERS, TRYED TO HELP SOMEONE, SHOW PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT THEM. WHEN WE DIE WHAT ARE THE FIRST MEMORIES YOUR LOVED ONES AND FRIENDS ARE GOING TO REMEMBER THAT YOU HAD A SUCCESSFUL JOB, OR ARE THEY GOING TO REMEMBER HOW YOU TREATED THEM?
    WELL IT WILL BE HOW YOU TREATED THEM IF YOU WERE KIND TRYED TO DO THINGS FOR OTHERS.. ETC..ETC...

    SO I'M MORE THEN SURE YOU ARE SERVING YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE. TAKE CARE, TAMMY

  15. lilaclover30

    lilaclover30 New Member

    I am 75, have raised 3 most successful children - their lives are focused on God and they have raised a total of 9 grandchildren.

    My main purpose is taking care of hubby. He had a heart attack at 46, had leg amputation at 53,had 2 more heart attacks and by-pass surgery. He has just completed radiation treatment for prostate cancer.!!!!!

    He does walk with a cane and gets around pretty good but------the house is left to me to manage. Sometimes i get so tired and exhausted.

    Still, selfishly, I would love to be the center of his life. I feel that I am the caretaker and I am.

    i have FMS, CFS, scoliosis, OA and spinal stenosis. I need a knee replacement but am not encouraged to do it ---- by hubby. There is no one to help me out.

    Still, the Lord is withme whatever I do and I will have the faith that I can continue caring and loving him.

    Gentle Hugs and xxxxx's

    Joan
    Joan
  16. kriket

    kriket New Member



    You are an inspiration. We all take so many things for granted. As the old saying goes " No matter how hard you have it- you can look around and find someone that has it worse." You are a very strong person. You sound like you are solid as a rock and have always served others. Your story touched me.


    Kriket
  17. UnicornK

    UnicornK New Member

    I am a Christian, so that never changes.

    I have always had a thing for animals. I have worked with both domestic and wild animals, and I'd like to again.

    I also work with teen girls at church. Sometimes they tend to get curious about things that could do them harm. I've been there, done that, and got the T-shirt. I talk to them, go out with them, just do fun things....we took a beading class once, and we go out to lunch, and we've done bible studies too. It's very rewarding to see a girl who is heading down the wrong path do a Uturn. (We have a saying... "God allows U turns.")

    God Bless.
  18. ANNXYZ

    ANNXYZ New Member

    It is to demonstrate the love of God and live a reasonably authentic christian life .

    My passion was to be a wonderful mother and wife . I think I succeeded overall, yet still ended up divorced
    which came as a shock . My kids will say they had a great childhood , which means a lot to me. Now that they are grown , I definitely feel a void w/o a husband and children to nurture . I do not think that void can ever totally be filled for me , as those relationships can not be duplicated .

    as Mikie says , we learn to make the best of what we have and where we are . I REALLY do struggle with wanting to live a more useful life . If I were healthy , I would love to spend a year in a Romanian orphanage loving little ones . I can not do much physically now, and never know how much energy to plan on from day to day .
    [This Message was Edited on 07/06/2006]