OT Funny: Let's here some clean limerics

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by UnicornK, Oct 14, 2006.

  1. UnicornK

    UnicornK New Member

    We need some funny stuff going on here.

    Let's make up some clean limerics. I know Ken, MrDad and Rocky can come up with some. Let's hear some from everyone!

    Keep it clean! The dirty ones are too easy! LOL

    God Bless.
    [This Message was Edited on 10/14/2006]
  2. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    A clean limerick? Isn't that an oxymoron? Do you know the name comes from the city of Limerick in Ireland?

    At any rate, I have one here:



    MEMORIES

    A dashing gent named Mr. Dad,
    Said, "I refuse to be sad.
    It's true I have greyed.
    I'm a little bit frayed.
    But think of the fun I have had."
  3. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member


    A naive young fellow from Minn.
    Bid goodbye to his friends and his kin.

    His mettle to test:
    He headed out west.

    Where he learned to play cards and drink gin.

  4. UnicornK

    UnicornK New Member

    Come on, folks! It doesn't have to be original!

    There once were two cats of Kilkenny
    Each thought there was one cat too many
    So they fought and they fit
    And they scratched and they bit
    Until instead of two cats there weren't any!

    Get the idea? Have fun!

    God Bless.
  5. Smiffy

    Smiffy Member

    We could add a line each, I'll start -

    Therer once was a lady from Hull....
  6. UnicornK

    UnicornK New Member

    Who ate til her stomach was full
  7. penstemon

    penstemon New Member

    here's a couple I made up when I was feeling silly one day:

    Old Skip was such a round hound
    He measured thirty inches around.
    He’d get started downhill,
    You shouldn’t stand still,
    He’d squash you right into the ground.


    One morning, I looked out of my tent,
    A skunk left behind its foul scent.
    No amount of soap
    Could help my nose cope.
    I stunk of skunk wherever I went.
  8. Callum

    Callum New Member

    There once was an unfinished limerick,
  9. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    it's going to stay unfinished, Callum. Kinda like Schubert's unfinished Symphony.

    Great Work, Penstemon. Love 'em both! How about deleting the "of" in the last line re: the skunk opus. Whaddya think?

    Here's one called:


    Margarine is better for you


    There was a young maiden who yearned
    To discover how butter was churned.

    But the force of the paddle
    Caused her brain cells to addle.

    How costly the lesson she learned!
  10. happycanuk

    happycanuk New Member

    There once was a fellow named Rock
    Who learned from the school of hard knocks

    He started to fight
    but soon took his flight

    As he didn't want to be mocked
  11. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    There once was a Happy Canuck.
    But was it a Cathy or Chuck?


    No profile in sight.
    If I would guess right,
    It simply would be my good luck!

  12. happycanuk

    happycanuk New Member

  13. dononagin

    dononagin New Member

    Rock... I knew you'd be good at this! Ya'll are too funny!
  14. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    How's that married life working out.

    Tell us about Joe when you're feeling chatty.
  15. springlakeorphan

    springlakeorphan New Member

    There once was a lady from Hull
    Who ate till her stomach was full
    She still wanted more......
  16. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    There once was a Lady from Hull
    Who ate till her stomach was full.

    She still wanted more
    So she married a bore:

    A rich actor named Martin Mull.


    W/ apologies to Mr. Mull. Had to be him or Jethro Tull. Couldn't think of anyone else.
  17. Callum

    Callum New Member

    How about "an 'actor' named Steven Segal?" (pronounced see-GULL)
    [This Message was Edited on 10/18/2006]
  18. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Is that the right way to pronounce it? I always thought it rhymed w/ gal, cal or pal.

    The general rule w/ names seems to be that they can be pronounced or spelled anyway the owner likes. I have ancestors named Merrick.

    About 100 years ago a Merrick wrote a book on famiy history. He found documents spelling the name 8 different ways.

    Speaking of the theatre, I wondered if David Merrick was a relative. Later read Merrick was not original name.
  19. hugs4evry1

    hugs4evry1 New Member

    This is hillarious!! (can't spell today, too tired)

    Hugs all,

    Nancy B
  20. happycanuk

    happycanuk New Member

    There once was a happy canuk
    who really had all kinds of luck

    The lady had kidz
    was really a whiz

    But couldn't shoot a puck
    [This Message was Edited on 10/19/2006]