OT .....JOKES ........... a blonde's year in review .......LOLOL

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by victoria, Nov 6, 2006.

  1. victoria

    victoria New Member

    Lest anyone get upset over blonde jokes, something we've had discussion over before.... for the record, I'm a natural blonde and can't for a minute really think it is a stereotype...

    even tho I have brain fog and can be pretty dense at times!

    A Blondes Year in Review..

    Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

    Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels. Helllloooo!!! -- bottles won't fit into printers!

    MARCH -
    Got really excited. . . . I finished a jigsaw puzzle in 5 months! The box said "2-4 years"!

    APRIL -
    Trapped on excalator for hours because power went out at the mall!

    MAY -
    Tried to make Kool-Aid. . . . WRONG INSTRUCTIONS! -- 8 Cups of water won't fit into those little packets!

    JUNE -
    Tried to go water skiing. . . couldn't find a lake with a slope however. Darn!

    JULY -
    Lost breast stroke swimming competition. I learned later the other swimmers cheated!! -- They used their arms!!

    AUGUST -
    Got locked out of my car in rainstorm :(( As a result, my car was swamped because the soft-top was down. Just my luck!

    The capital of California IS "c" . . . . isn't it?

    OCTOBER - Hate M & M'S.....They're so very hard to peel!

    Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days. It was tough as a rock! I don't understand . . . . . The instructions said to bake 1 hour per pound, and I weight 108 pounds!

    Couldn't call 911. Well DUH! There's NO "11" button on the stupid phone!!! Note to self: Write my representatives about the waste of taxpayers' money on emergency centers. . .

    [This Message was Edited on 11/06/2006]
  2. victoria

    victoria New Member

    LOL, today's been one of those days where I could have done all of those things....!

  3. nerdieduckie

    nerdieduckie New Member

    ...Why do I identify with this so well?

    *Stares at hair* IT'S BROWN!

    Everyone accuses me of having blond roots that I cover really well...
  4. hugs4evry1

    hugs4evry1 New Member

    As always, thanks for helping me start my day with a laugh!


    Nancy B
  5. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Here's one I found on the internet.

    Blonde is sick and tired of BLONDE jokes. Dyes her hair brunette.

    Goes for a drive, hoping to find someone she can impress w/ her new persona. Drives by a farm and gets an idea. Stops, does some counting, then proceeds to the next field where she waves at a farmer.

    "Is this your farm?"


    "All the animal around here yours?"


    "Well, I want to prove something. If I can tell you how many sheep you have in your pasture over there, will you give me one?"

    "Well, Ok, I guess so."


    "Hey, that's right."

    "Thank you. I'll just take this little sheep with me."

    As she climbs back in the car the farmer says, "Oh, Miss. If I can guess your real hair color, will you give me back my dog?"

  6. victoria

    victoria New Member

    even Ten Cap

    The other day I was in the local auto part store. A lady came in and asked for a seven ten cap.

    We all looked at each other and said, "What's a seven ten cap?"

    She said "You know, it's right on the engine. Mine got lost some how | and I need a new one."

    "What kind of a car is it on," they asked? Now I'm thinking maybe an old Datsun Seven Ten but no, she said its a Buick.

    "OK lady, how big is it?"

    She makes a circle with her hands about 3 1/2 inches in diameter.

    "What does it do?," we asked.

    She said, "I don't know, but its always been there."

    One of us gave her a note pad and asked her if she could draw a picture of it. So she makes a circle about 3 1/2 inches in diameter and in the center she writes 710.

    The guys behind the counter are looking at it upside down as she writes it...and they just fall down behind the counter laughing so hard in hysterics.

    One guy said, "I think you want an oil cap."

    She said, "Seven Ten cap, oil cap, I don't care what you call it, I just need one, and I don't see what is so funny about it."

    Yes, she was a blonde. . .
  7. tinktink

    tinktink New Member

    Always nice to throw a little levity into the day.... thanks!

    Best Wishes Diana