OT: Question regarding your home's upkeep...need advice.

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by KateMac329, Apr 11, 2006.

  1. KateMac329

    KateMac329 New Member


    I was wondering if any of you had trouble keeping your home's appearance.

    My husband and I live out in the county but have neighbors. It isn't really a "neighborhood" but it is one street out in the middle of nowhere with about 13 houses on it.

    Well, my husband and I have been in the process of relandscaping the front of our house. It is quite obvious for anyone to look at it that we are in the process of working on it.

    We pick up after ourselves but there is a pile of dirt in a our driveway for filling in the front areas which has been there for three weeks but it gets smaller each week, we have a pile of plants waiting to be planted sitting in front of our garage and we have landscaping bricks in a pile which is also getting smaller as we make the border.

    Okay so my question for you guys is do you have trouble keeping your house looking beautiful? We work outside on our home, keep the yard mowed and weed whacked and picked up but beyond our landscaping project and a newborn baby we don't have a lot of time to work outside.

    (Oh and I also have new flowers out at my mailbox and new planters with ferns on either side of our garage door.)

    Okay so anyway my point to this incredibly long post is I got an anonymous typed letter in my mailbox that said this:

    Dear Neigbor,
    The sense of a "neighborhood" is important to all of us and when we buy a house, we also invest in the area that surrounds it. The identity of the neighborhood is as important to property values as the individual property itself. The quality of the neighborhood will play a big role in a home's appraisal & resale value.
    Please keep the outside of your home neat and beautiful for the quality and value of our neighborhood.

    Can you believe that someone put that in my mailbox? I was very hurt and embarrassed. We are trying our hardest to get the front done but like I said with a newborn it is very difficult. NOT to mention feeling like crap all the time!!!

    Please if you have any advise as to what to do I would love to hear it.

    SORRY for the long post!!!


  2. mollystwin

    mollystwin New Member

    Wow. I can't believe how incredibly rude people can be. It's obvious that you are in the process of landscaping!
    Try not to worry about this. Some people just can't help being who they are!
  3. KateMac329

    KateMac329 New Member

    Hey Storm,
    How are you doing? Thanks for your reply. The people that I think did might want to put their house up on the market but that is all hearsay (sp?).

    I think what I have decided to do is to crumple the piece of paper up, throw it away and not waste my emotional energy on this!!!!

    It is hard to when you are hurt and embarrassed like that but my husband just left for the rest of the week on a business trip and I need to be completely here to take care of my little boy.

    So...KISS MY BUTT Neighbors!!!!

    Thanks for your reply!!!


  4. sues1

    sues1 New Member

    I would then answer that you would accept any help in finishing your projects if they are so concerned.

    Maybe you could copy it and add a short letter that you have a newborn baby, a disabling illness and you work on the project as fast as you can. That you are sorry if this upsets anyone, but you are trying to upgrade the outside of your home. That you feel it is important to.....

    Send the 12 letters or hand them out to your neighbors...

    It is uncomfortable to recieve such. But you have nothing to be ashamed of.....

  5. KateMac329

    KateMac329 New Member

    Thanks for your reply.

    People can be rude and it just shows you the kind of people we all live around, each neighborhood has them!

    It is funny though because if I knew who wrote the letter I would go tell them that if they were that worried about it they COULD come over and help get it done faster! LOL

    Only one of my neighbors knows I am sick. I do not tell people because as we all know people just do not "get it".

    But yes having a newborn and being sick, hey they are lucky we are out there working on it at all!!! LOL


  6. lilaclover30

    lilaclover30 New Member

    They ALL need to know of your situation. That is horrid, and yes, it is illegal.

    If will be difficult to make the "understand" that you are ill - but that does not excuse anyone for being so rude.

    Gentle Hugs

  7. teacher

    teacher New Member

    Do you have neighborhood association meetings? If you do, save the letter and get on the agenda for the next meeting. Bring it up and inform them that to use a mailbox in such a manner is illegal and could be misconstrued as a threat.

    Then explain your sitation and invite all who are interestd over for a "Landscaping and Potluck" party. When all the work is done, fire up the grill and enjoy your neighbors!

    You don't have to stress about who wrote it and maybe you'll get enough takers to get the work done!

  8. wildflowers2

    wildflowers2 New Member

    To whom it may concern:

    Since you have so much time on your hands you can always come volenteer and HELP US get our work done. OR you can be a
    kind neighbor and PAY a landscaper to do it for us. SInce you are so concerned with the way our property looks.

    OH and by the way when our taxes are dur how about pitching in
    for that as well!!!!!

    Or Id have a truck full of sand dumped in their driveway!!!

  9. kdeenak

    kdeenak New Member

    Sounds Like a Property Owner Association letter to me, are you a member? They do stupid stuff like this. They measured (yes measured!) the grass around my sister-in-law's mailbox and a couple of blades were too long and they put a letter like this in her mailbox too.

    My husband just absolutely refuses to move into a neighborhood with a POA telling us what to do when we buy a house.

  10. KateMac329

    KateMac329 New Member

    We are not apart of any home owner's association just out in the county.

    It is just us and about 13 other houses just plopped out in what used to be a cotton field. There are no neighborhood meetings of any sort so that is not the issue.

    The issue is just plain rude and cowardly people.

    You guys are right, I don't need to waste my ebergy on this but at the same time I feel so awkward. I don't even want to go outside at all now!

    But I also look at it like we are doing the best we can and it will get done when we can get it done.

    Someone mentioned having the neighbor help out, well that would have been a good way to go about it instead of the way they did. If our project bothered them so much they could have offered to help us get it finished instead of being childish.

    Still it hurts...


  11. jakeg

    jakeg New Member

    I would put a sign in the front yard that says this.

    If you do not like the way my yard looks PLEASE close your eyes when passing.

  12. mme_curie68

    mme_curie68 New Member

    I am still continuously astounded at the magnitude of some people's ignorance and sheer gall to appoint themselves arbiters of "neighborhood" affairs.

    It sounds like you're doing the best you can and I can certainly attest with a young baby in the house that it is well-nigh impossible to maintain yard "perfection".

    I would put that piece of paper smack dab in the middle of the barbecue grill, douse it with lighter fluid and toss a match on it.

    Then I would paint my house puke green, blaze orange or maybe camoflage colors AND be sure to add light displays and plastic lawn ornaments for each and every holiday.

    Now THAT would liven things up...

    Don't let the idiots get you down.

    Madame Curie
  13. neen85

    neen85 New Member

    Rent one of those HUGE lawn storks to welcome your new baby for a few weeks......that oughta perk up the looks of the lawn!! How awful of sosmebody!! I would write a letter back and address your chronic illness and new baby.

    The lawn improvement party sounds good. My neighbors had a house painting party (they have 2 young girls)after they prepped the house. Painting was followed by a nice cookout.
    It worked out well. Maybe the rude person of the bunch would feel guilty about their letter then and rethink being so rude next time.

    Maybe start your letter off with...In case you weren't aware we recently had a new arrival...... ...on top of this I also deal with a debilitating chronic illness......due to both our yard improvement projects haven't moved along as planned. Due to the unsigned letter we received in our mail box recently (see attached copy)we feel need to address this immediately by having a lawn improvement party.

    Include details,invite all! Juat an idea! Daneen
  14. LittleBluestem

    LittleBluestem New Member

    I hope that the people who did this put their house on the market and get it sold soon. It seems to me like getting rid of them would be the biggest neighborhood improvement that could be made. Three weeks is not an unreasonable amount of time to spend on a landscaping project for anyone, healthy or not. Once the project is finished the value of your property will increase, as well as the neighborhood appeal. These people sound like major idiots.

    If you have a yard improvement party, I wouldn’t apologize for the amount of time you have been working. Just say something to the effect that “since some of you to want our landscaping project finished immediately” and attach the letter. Then see how many of the neighbors point out to you that they had nothing to do with the letter. I bet it will be all but one. I also bet they will be really made at the people who sent it.
  15. KateMac329

    KateMac329 New Member

    I am headed to bed for the night (hopefully!!!) and wanted to check in real quick.

    Thank you all for replying to my post. I was really hurt by this person(s) actions and I really do feel uncomfortable going outside now but at the same time I don't care. Does that make sense?

    I hope whoever did this DOES put their house up for sale soon and it sells quickly so we don't have to put up with them anymore.

    I have a pretty good idea of who did it and believe me the woman walks around like she is some kind of millionare and like her poop don't stink. I am not the only one that has gotten a nasty vibe from her so good ridence (sp)!!!

    Okay all I hope you have a wonderful night and wish me luck sleeping! My husband is out of town and it is just me to take care of the baby so that means no sleep meds for me!


    Thanks for all your support!

  16. suzetal

    suzetal New Member

    In Bright RED................... This Yard Is My Yard.

    It is also illegal for any thing but mail to be put in your mail box......If you ever see anyone other than the mail man putting something in there call post office and turn them in...............It is a Federal law and comes with hefty penalty's.

    The nerve of some people.


    PS I would put what ever else I could find to make it look real bad just to p*** them off .LOL
  17. wildflowers2

    wildflowers2 New Member

    I love your ideas on the color schemes......

    and lawn critters.....why dont you rent a donkey__double meaning...and when it breys / hollars all the time and teh neighbor complains..simple state....not only does

    our new donkey eat the grass and weeds it fertalizes
    where it goes,,,,would you like to borrow him????

    or the olde expression......my cow just died I dont need your bull!!!!!!
  18. matthewson

    matthewson New Member

    Those type of people are in every area of the country! Believe me, we live out in the country and we have been having trouble with our neighbors who we share a drive with. They are in front of us and they actually called the township and said that we had big trucks going in and out of our driveway! I had furniture delivered!

    They have called the township numerous times on us and they always come out and we always tell them that our neighbors just don't like us! Then they go away.

    They complained about the traffic going down the driveway. We had 2 teenagers and my husband and I have a lot of friends, so of course we have people coming and going! They are the ones who built too close to the driveway! They have 3 acres and they could have placed it further away, but they are really cheap and actually instead of making their own driveway like they were supposed to, they use ours (it is an easement accross their property).

    They also were not going to pay for the major underground electric line which is shared by 4 households, but the electric company got them on that! They said they could either pay their share now, or they could pay all of us later to come off of it!

    I could go on forever (actually, I feel much better now getting this out!! LOL), but you get the picture! I would just ignore the letter and just go about your business. No matter where you go, there will always be someone who likes to mind everyone's business!

    Take care, Sally

    PS. I like the donkey idea! We actually thought about having chickens and other farm animals which we are allowed to have on our acreage, just to T them off! But, we would have had to take care of them, which we weren't inclined to do, but just the thought was enough to make us laugh!
    [This Message was Edited on 04/12/2006]
  19. mahx

    mahx New Member

    I have a hard enough time keeping the inside livable....much less worrying if the outside is attractive enough for my neighbors.

    Ignore them.

    A couple cars up on blocks may be a nice yard ornament for a while....hehehe

  20. aquabugs

    aquabugs New Member

    I applaud you for even tackling a yard improvement project with this DD, even more so with a new baby!! I think it is amazing that you can do that much. Phooey on your rude neighbor. Maybe they will sell and move into a place with a POA telling them they can't leave their garage doors open, what color they can paint their house, etc. What jerks! (We lived in one of those places in CA for a couple years and I just hated it.)

    I live in the country now,too and I love for my yard to look good, but unfortunately, anytime I try to work out there these days, I end up overdoing it and wind up on the couch for days. My brother is fantastic; he mows and trims my yard. My flower beds are "au naturel" at this time. LOL I MEANT for those weeds to grow there. LOL

    Do the best you can for your family and your home. The neighbors don't matter as long as you are happy with your efforts.

    Take care

[ advertisement ]