OT : Worried about my teenage boy

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by kalley167, Jul 11, 2006.

  1. kalley167

    kalley167 New Member

    I know this has nothing to do with FMS, but you guys have all been there for me. My son has had the worse luck with girls. The last girl friend wanted to date him but when he would make pland she would want to go but if someone called with a better offer she would cancel. Well he got rid of here. Well now this other girl started talking to him and she told him right off the bat that she USED to date this other boy Matt, and that she doesn't like him anymore.My son asked her to attend my daughters wedding with him and she accepted. Even bought a new dress with her mom.My son ran into them at the mall and they showed him and talked about the wedding.

    So anyways the kids all chat on this Xanga site and she posted recently (which my son showed me) when someone asked her if she was still dating Matt she said yes of course. Now I am so worried that she is playing my son. He hasn't come right out and asked her about it I have told him too but he hasn't. Now this Matt kid isn't a good kid, he has been in trouble for assaukting another kids at school and was on probabtion. Now I am wondering if her parents have told her she can't see him and she is using my son who is a good kid, to get her parents off her back while she is also still seeing this Matt kid.

    I just don't know what I can do. My son seems down about all of it but she still is coming to the wedding this weekend. So not only do I worry about my son my daughter is also getting married. My husband has started a new job and will be out of town until Friday. Anyways I was wondering if anyone has suggestions as to how i handle this, how do I keep him from getting down on himself?? I told him to not get attached to her and just go with the flow. But I worry also that this kid will come after him.
    OMG I just don't know what to do.
  2. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    sometimes they just need to work it out amongst themselves...
    you could ask if he has feelings for her....
    i would encourage him to ask this girl if she is still dating this matt boy...sometimes people date more than one at a time..


    if your son knows she is dating this matt person...he needs to decide if he wants an exclusive relationship w/her or if he doesn't mind sharing time w/matt....

    maybe your son is just wanting to be friends w/this girl....

    if he doesn't then you could tell him maybe he should think about moving on to find someone else that is more available....


    i feel it is better to let him make the decision opposed to you telling him what he should do...sometimes they rebel or he may resent you for telling him to call it off w/her...

    it is part of growing up and learning to make choices and decisions...

    my son told me he just needs to figure things out for himself...

    and trust me i told him i think he should break up w/gf...but if he wants to put up w/it then he needs to figure out when enough is enough...

    they pshycologist that we both had seen over this gf last year...told me basically to butt out and let cody learn about relationships and it is about growing up etc...

    so i try my darnest to stay out of it...

    does he know this matt guy? maybe he could call matt and get the truth....

    maybe this girl is wanting to sound good about herself to say she is still seeing this matt guy...we don't know...

    but from what you told me...i would tell this girl to take a hike...she is too confusing after reading her xango...stuff


    jodie
  3. kalley167

    kalley167 New Member

    and I am backing off of it. But it just makes me ache inside for him. Yes maybe she is still dating him but maybe not exclusively. So I guess we will have to see how it all plays out. It's just hard as you both sound like you know to sit back, and not be able to control any of this. I guess thats the mama bear in us. I am saying my prayers that this all works out without to much pain to my sons heart.
    Thanks for the replies and advice they are well taken and good advice.