Our Illness is "Not a Character Flaw

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Kellyslaw, Mar 27, 2007.

  1. Kellyslaw

    Kellyslaw New Member

    I went to see my doc yesterday as a follow-up to see if I am able to return to my teaching job. My dh and my doc and I decided that I am not ready or able to return to my job that I dearly love. I have had 2 mingranes and I now have not one but 2, cold sores on my nose and lip. (Pretty huh?) My face is swollen and I look like I have been hit in the face. Of course, as most of you know, this is only one of the horrible symptoms of FMS.

    While I was talking to my dd about why I have not gotten better since I was diagnosed on January 16th 2007, she said that having this illness is not a "Character flaw" it is an illness. I wanted share these words with all of you because I know how sensitive most of us are about our illnesses because a lot of people do not understand or have compassion for those of us with FMS/ME/CFS. It made me feel so much better when my dd said this to me. Just a few kind words can make a horrible situation so much more bearable. We must keep up the good fight by maintaining our own self-esteem and by emotionally supporting each other as we travel these roads.

    My heart goes out to each and everyone of you, my fellow sufferers.

    Love and Hugs,
  2. GoldensRule

    GoldensRule New Member

    Thank you for your post!

    I agree that we are strong people. Our bodies may be a little flawed but not our souls. Definately not a character flaw and we should not feel guity for having the disease. Anyone who deals with being in pain everyday has to be strong. It took me a long time before I realized how strong I actually was and stopped seeing myself as weak.

    I hope that you feel better soon. Migraines are horrible.
  3. Waynesrhythm

    Waynesrhythm Member

    Thanks for your post Kelly. I've long felt that a silver lining of this illness is that we have an opportunity to become our own heroes and heroines. Viewing ourselves this way goes a long way in countering some of the "slights" sent our way.

  4. jole

    jole Member

    While in fact I believe everything you guys say, it is still soooo hard some days to actually feel that way. That to me is the greatest thing about this board. We keep being reminded that we are strong and good, which we all need to hear often, I think.

    Thanks for the post!
  5. momof471

    momof471 New Member

    Thank you, that made my day!

    God Bless
  6. Jackie65

    Jackie65 New Member

    Thank you. :)
  7. MsE

    MsE New Member

    What we are dealing with is not a result of character flaws. It is hard to keep that in mind, though.

    My New Year's resolution, which I have kept only to some extent, is "Never Complain; Never Explain." I chose that because I had realized that I had felt it necessary to "explain" my tiredness, fogginess, etc.

    Then I realized that the folks that don't "get it" aren't going to "get it" because of anything more I have to say. And I try to save my complaining for this Board and a dear friend who understands.

    But it's hard. It's human nature to want to lessen our own loads by sharing them with others. However, most others don't want us to share, so I'm trying to keep my big mouth shut. Not doing too well.
  8. meditationlotus

    meditationlotus New Member

    believes CFS is real and he supports me. But it is tough for us. I think that when the name for CFS is changed it will help. But "fibromyalgia" sounds good and still some people don't take it seriously.

    Time is on our side.
  9. Kellyslaw

    Kellyslaw New Member

    for your replies. I just love reading responses to posts. It makes me feel like I really belong.

    You all made my day :)


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