Pain hurts like hell but I try to remain positive (light vent)

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by fibrohugslife, Aug 25, 2006.

  1. fibrohugslife

    fibrohugslife New Member

    Man I am still awake due to the high pain I am in, and it has been like that all this week due to the jetlag and fight with my mom which in turned caused me to have anxiety attack and have some thoughts about myself that I should not be having.

    I guess you would say that would be a rough time and it has been but I am trying to stay positive. I have not been on here reading and posting as school has begun and I hate each paper I have to write but I am proud of myself starting early on my papers and knocking them out the way.

    I am trying to stay positive and came to realization that I do need to live on my own but I can't do that yet as I need to get approved for SSI and SSDI and that will help me to get better housing.

    The stress of my family is too much, between both my mom and dad, I feel like they are going to drive me to the grave with picking on me to do this or that and it is not an utter emergency for things to be done.

    They want things done NOW and I don't see the rush. I see only shelters available for me to live in out here if I wanted to move out which aren't a good idea as I would be alone, dangerous situation and would have no help with things and that would be more stress than I can handle. So I am just stuck here.

    I have been reading a lot, which is good and it keeps my mind off of the pain somewhat. Been out on a few dates (with the same guy), I think we are on date 6 or 7 and so far he has been nice, a gentleman, and in control of himself LOL.

    I have chatted with him online for sheesh about 6 months and never thought that I would meet him, and he knows I am ill. He has been a great friend to me as well. So we shall see where it goes....I am very cautious. I am just waiting for the shoe to drop off the other foot LOL.

    I had already made a decision to take myself off of the dating sites as I keep meeting bad people one after another. Adding a chronic illness to that, a majority of guys just do not understand. So I rather be single than trying to find a man to have a relationship with.


    Anyway I have talked long enough but just wanted to get those things off my chest.
  2. gymmbabe

    gymmbabe New Member

    Hi there,

    I'm sorry you are having such a tough time. Just remember that coming here to vent is a healthy thing.

    I'm glad that you are trying to stay positive--sometimes,that's hard to do.

    {{{super gentle hugs}}}

    Dawn
  3. fibrohugslife

    fibrohugslife New Member

    Thanks on your comment about the dating sites. I am not saying they are a bad thing but it is just not for me right now.

    I still have time in my life to date and all of that mess. Also I don't understand men at all. I guess those years of not dating really impacted me a lot.


    Plus I have this feeling that I may have possibly met someone, and he has been right under my nose all this time for almost a year or so. I just never really noticed him and that is unfortunately what happens to the nice guys. They don't get noticed.

    I met him online on myspace LOL. When I became officially single around May, he asked me out and I was like eeeh I don't knoooow lol. I had one other date and that was a horrible date and I think I posted about on here LOL. So I was scared of dates and men.

    But he was persistent, sweet, gentle and kept asking until I finally said yes. Mind you I was interested in him too but just scared.

    Then we went out and had a blast and then he wanted to help me when I go to Sam's Club and I am Miss Independent and wouldn't allow him to come with me. I should have allowed to come, so I wouldn't have to pick up such heavy items LOL.

    So we shall see how things go. If it works then fine great and if it does not then fine great. I have school and all to focus on along with my health.
  4. fibrohugslife

    fibrohugslife New Member

    This site has saved my life countless times and I am ever so grateful for everyone on here and their willingness to encourage me and everyone else with whatever that is going on with their lives.

    I still have not slept yet however I took something to try to make me sleep as I took something for the pain (my lessened enough to allow the pain pill to work) and to sleep and will see if it works.

    I think my body has built up a tolerance so I am going to have to consult my doctor about the pain medications. The Neurontin (Gabapentin-generic) does work but my body is slowly building up a tolerance so I think I am going to need a higher dosage. Anyhoo, I hope to be able to rest, then go with my folks to the movies if I can, and finish my paper that I barely started LOL.

    I am still thinking about how to move out but right now it seems I am better off staying where I am even though it is the Stress Express House for me.
  5. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    fibrohugslife:

    You are the one who is sick and I believe you are the #1 priority. No matter who you have to steam roller over: do what is good for you. Just my suggestion.

    If you believe you are headed for the shelter: check out all of your alternatives.

    From what I know about shelters, they will get you on welfare, give you a place to eat and sleep and will find you a low-rent subsidized apartment to share with others.

    It seems like a rough road to go on, but it is one option.

    If it were me, I would really give heck to the ones who do not understand and get all the doctors notes you can to show them.

    You take care and let us know how it goes,

    nyrofan
  6. fibrohugslife

    fibrohugslife New Member

    That I am not considered disabled yet by anywhere unless I get approved for SSI or SSDI and I have not been approved for either one yet. Out here it only works if you got the approval. i don't have any of those so until I get approved for those programs I don't get to be able to necessarily move.

    So I just have to hang in there for awhile. Plus my parents will be moving about a year. So I will not be here very long anyway.
  7. PVLady

    PVLady New Member

    I am also in S. Cal and have been hurting alot the past days. I wonder if it is the weather or barometric pressure. I have been so sick...

    I admire your positive attitude. I also try to keep a good attitude. I started a business ten years ago while sick. As long as I have a computer, phone and fax - I can work from home.

    I know you will be successful. I wish you could meet a couple of nice people to share an apartment so you would not be so stressed where you live.

    I have always felt things happen for a reason. I will keep the best thoughts for you that everything works out. I hope you are feeling better soon.