Pain making me an angry person

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Sheila1366, Apr 14, 2006.

  1. Sheila1366

    Sheila1366 New Member

    I can still crack a joke and laugh but behind every chuckle is someone suffering in severe pain.

    I am at the point I will just let in on someone in a heartbeat if they make me mad.Not my family,but a stranger.

    I got this road rage problem that I have never had.I just look for someone to say something smart to me just so I can yell at them.I had the chance to do just that last week.I was not out of control,I was cool,calm and collected.And let me tell ya the girl had it coming.

    How do we all function everyday with this kind of pain without punching someone in the face just for the heck of it?

    This fm is changing me.I am still my looney self but I am more blunt with people.Surprises me.But when I have had to be upfront with someone they deserved it.Maybe turning 40 has helped boost the assertiveness along with some good old killer pain.

    Sheila

  2. puggymom

    puggymom New Member

    I know how you feel. I am set off very easliy, good thing I live with just my pugs, who help to calm me down. I get very easily agitated when driving too.
  3. Sheila1366

    Sheila1366 New Member

    And let me tell ya she is a trip.Part beagle and pug makes one wild and crazy dog.She has the curly tail like a pug,the personality of a pug but the nose of a beagle.Our beagle died last year and my daugther bought herself a puggle.I knew alot about beagles but nothing about pugs.You oughta hear her howl.SHe tries to talk and howl at the same time.Hates to be alone and jealous of the cats.We love her to pieces.

    Good thing we both have some cuddle buddies to calm us down.

    Take care,
    Sheila
  4. puggymom

    puggymom New Member

    My two don't talk, the little one will when I'm getting their meals, he yells at me. But Mom's pug, well let's just say I have whole coversations with him.

    I don't know what I would do without them, they are a great relaxer, I look at their faces and it just reminds me what is important.
  5. taniazcatz

    taniazcatz New Member

    FMS has changed a bunch of us. I know I am much more serious, I do tend to get angry quicker tha I used to, I was never a very patients person but that's even worse than it used to be. How can any one really expect to have FMS and it not alter your personality?

    It was difficult for me to keep friends, but I think I am learning to adjust, it's not only you. And you are certainly in the right place here for understanding. We have to be here for each other, not many others will really understand how you are feeling.

    Tanya
  6. srh

    srh New Member

    Patience in one of the replys perked me up. I don't have patience anymore either.

    When I was younger I was probably the most patient person of anybody aroung my family.
    Very seldom did I get unpatient with my 4 boys. I'm not saying I never, but not very often.

    The first time I noticed myself impatient was when our son was killed. I just realized it one day.

    I think when we go through what we have to go through it's hard to be patient with all the rediculous ppl out there.

    P.S. I don't get angry, I get hurt. I usually just bawl.[This Message was Edited on 04/14/2006]
  7. caroleye

    caroleye New Member

    Even though I live a hermit's life, once in awhile I have people contact, and inevitably something will trigger me & I get so angry. This was not my pre-illness nature.

    Mornings are the worst by far. Poor husband can't come near me until 10AM. I'm one miserable, irritable 'B' until my caffeine cocktail wakes me up.

    And, yes, my warrior comes out if anyone gets in my face. I con't turn the other cheek, but will come right back at them. I justify it by saying I don't need inconsiderate, toxic people in my "space".

    But I'd give everything I own to have my old nature back. I liked her alot. boo-hoo......

    LIGHT*********carole
  8. Denamay

    Denamay New Member

    I try to keep on top of my pain and mood,but for the past week I have been fighting a loosing battle.

    I was doing quite well trying to loose weight and making progress in exercising.

    Then a different pain hit with a bang, it got me in my rt. shoulder arm and ribs. The dr.said it is tendonitis and gave me Celebrex, to no avail.

    I had agreed to look after my grandchildren last week for a day and then backed out of my commitment.

    [My daughter had surgury and needed the help.

    Yesterday I turned down an Easter dinner invitation my responce to the invitation was:"I feel like hell and can't come" this is just not like me.

    I am lucky to have a wonderful family and friends, but I am angry with the lot of them, but mainly I am angry with myself because I can't seem to get on top of this resentment and learn to accept my condition. All for now Denamay
  9. Bambi

    Bambi New Member

    think about this the most was my best friend saying "You've lost the spark that was you". And her husband said something to razz me another time and it went over my head and I started answering him seriously. He said, "What's going on with you, I used to always be able to get a rise out of you with things like that!". Ever since those things I've TRIED to be a little more laid back. But it's true the anger is always just below the surface.

    Anger is just fear they say. And maybe that is part of it. Fear of what will happen next, will all this turn into something more, will they never find a cure...all those things.
    And most of all will I never get any better than I am right now..will old age make me an invalid with this on top of it?

    I also get frustrated at not being able to do some simple things I used to do. I've ACCEPTED the fact of FM and most of the time am ok with it but emotionally it's a drain. I get much more easily hurt also. Things people say in jest are often taken to be mean. I cry easier and at nothing sometimes. I am sooo much more sensitive about personal remarks and I was always sensitive anyway. I don't recognize "me" either alot. My friend was right.
  10. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Well-Known Member

    Yes I sure do here you all loud and clear !!

    I am a 65 y/o granni ( 5 kids and 8 grand kids) still fairly active considering. I have been in quite a bit of pain for about 20 years and have not been dxed as yet. Went to an endo not to long ago in hopes of her helping my thyroid to be the cause. She did help mythroid I think and is also working aggressively on my severe osteoporosis. So, now I am on Forteo shots but that is another matter.

    Finally have a Rheumatologist appointment the beginning of May. That is also one big frustration as many of you, I am sure all know and understand. I am hoping for at least some validation that I am not crazy and that this is a real disease. I was dxed with EBVS ( now ai think called CFS) at least 20 years ago and when I started complaining of the pain esp in my head and neck ( and fatigue) no one did much except took some x-rays and such and of course I was "fine." My thyroid test normal too. I don't remember what my TSH was at that time but I am sure it wasn't and now the labs and dr.'s are going by different numbers or what is c onsidered "normal". That is also another story as I am sure you all know.

    Back to the pain !! I am alot more "screechy" is what my husband says and vocal when things bother me, not like I used to be. I know also that I push myself cause I feel that I cannot spend my whole life in bed. My DH thinks he understand but he really has no clue. I am also waiting hopefully for a DX so I can show him what I have been putting up with all these years. He never did say anything about him not believing me but it urks me sometime when he starts complaining about very little things. I know that sometime I seem insensitive but that is hard to be about someone else when you are feeling like - - - - 95% of the time !!!

    All I can say is, IF get out there IF you can and TRY to do things that interest you and are fun. I love to sing and tap dance which I know are good for me and it is a very big diversion and keeps me from completely losing my sanity.

    Hugs and Holidays blessings to you all !!
    That granni Marilyn
  11. Sheila1366

    Sheila1366 New Member

    I can atleast joke around even in pain.

    I am at war with my body and I am gonna win.

    I worked in the garden 2 days in a row.It looks beautiful.

    And yes I hurt really bad, felt very weak and lightheaded, but I did what I wanted to do.I am just so mad at my body.I am pushing no matter what anymore.

    I know I will hit the wall soon but until I am gonna keep kicking.

    I have noticed once I do get outside and started working I think the pain just takes backseat to my desire to work on my gardens.

    I am looking into the future.I want a safe haven everywhere I turn in my garden.I want a place to go outside when we aren't feeling well and can just sit and relax and enjoy nature.

    I am going back to the gym tom. too.

    Right now I am just so mad at the pain I am ready to fight for my life.While I can.When the bottom falls out I will be a puddle of mush.But I can look outside at my beautiful gardens and all the birds coming to feed and nest and think...I did this,I am still the winner.

    HUGS,
    Sheila