perfume should be illegal - Christmas Eve service ruined

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by AuntTammie, Dec 24, 2009.

  1. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    just got back form Christmas Eve service - normally my very favorite thing all yr, becoming more and more difficult to get to church anymore bc of CFS, MCS, etc, but no way would I miss Christmas Eve if at all possible for me to I went and the person who sat rt next to me was wearing perfume - the result was that I felt totally sick, my eyes were driving me nuts, my head hurt, my sinuses were going crazy, I was dizzy, and couldn't breathe, etc, etc....could not focus on the service much at all....finally went to the back of the church and sat on the carpet for the rest of the service, and used my inhaler - of course, that meant pain, shaking, and big trouble getting up after

    so not cool, and I am so bummed, bc for me this yr, that was my entire Christmas : (

    LEFTYGG Member

    so sorry your night was ruined did she notice how you were acting. i dont wear perfume because i worked on people and i know it bothers a lot of people.

    i know people stare but would a mask help. it would probably scare them away lol
  3. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    I don't know if she noticed or not, but she didn't move (and there was an empty seat next to was weird, I was there first and then a grp came in, and though she was with that grp, she was sitting closer to me than to them)

    I did try putting my hand over my nose and mouth and breathing thru it, but it didn't I am not sure if a mask would have helped or not....I have actually used one for other things in the past, and it has helped a little, but not really enough.....and I am not normally THAT worried about how it looks, but for Christmas Eve service, I would have felt really odd

    I am actually trying to start a chronic illness/chronic pain ministry at my church, and if that gets going, I am hoping to ask for the church to set aside some seats as fragrance free, but in the meantime it is really getting so bad that i almost cannot attend church anymore even if I am actually feeling well enough otherwise (that is hit or miss, too).....and I realize that as sick as I am, trying to get this ministry going seems insane, but if I can get enough help, I think it will work out and be a big help for a lot of people
  4. quanked

    quanked Member

    A friend of mine had a woman at church go off on her about her "fragarance" and someone elses allergies. My friend does not wear fragances--she is somewhat chemically sensitive herself. But she became upset over this incident as the woman was quite rude to her. I think that the odor was from her bath soap as it turned out.

    My thoughts were--most of us cannot read minds. We have to speak up for ourselves and remove ourselves from the offending fragrance if we can. When we do this we not only are doing for ourselves but for others who have the same sensitivities. I know my friend and I know she goes out of her way to NOT offend others.

    There is no way that the general public can be educated about chemical senstivities unless we speak up. I have noticed that I do not often smell perfume on others anymore. I recall a time when shopping and the smell of perfume went hand in hand--especially in certain stores. I think people, in general, are more of aware of this problem now but some people can be obtuse about some things. My son wears too much cologne sometimes and being in the same vehicle with him is intolerable unless I open a window. I tell him he wears too much cologne for me and maybe for others too and i also do a lot serious coughing. He seems to be using less these days and that helps.

    I have some perfume that I rarely use because of issues like yours. If I use it I use sparingly. I do not mind some perfumes on others if it used sparingly and is not some in-your-face odor. A hint of a wonderful fragrance is enough for me.

  5. TeaBisqit

    TeaBisqit Member

    I get MCS flares from alot of stuff. Perfumes, deodorants, colognes. It's awful. I've been around people who just reeked from it and I totally die. I'm not sure we can ever really do much about it. We live in a society that is full of chemicals. It's on everything. Even if someone doesn't wear perfume, their shampoo has it or the soap or sometimes even what they washed their clothing in. It's just everywhere. I wish we had a magic pill to make us not be sensitive to it all.
  6. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    I do try to educate people about MCS and allergies, but by the time she sat there, the service was already starting and it was too loud and I would have had to lean close to her to tell her (making things worse), would have been disrupting the service, and might have offended her (if it were quieter where i could better explain I would not worry about that so much, but explanations can lose a lot when one is practically shouting to be heard)

    also, as to the amt, it does not matter how much or how little perfume the person has on - for people with MCS, ANY amt can be really bad (& it is also not just perfume or cologne, soap, as you were told, shampoo, lotion, make up, even laundry detergent can leave enough scent to cause a reaction) (perfume on top of other things is by far the worst, though - any amt can cause a reaction, but the more there is the worse the reaction)) I know that in the grocery store I can be a few isles away from the soap section and start to feel horrible

    it also has nothing to do with personal preference as far as how the scent smells (in other words I am not just having a problem when it is a fragrance that I don't like) I used to wear perfumes myself, before I had this problem and I miss wearing it - I know that people like to wear it and many do not know that it causes problems.....but even when I love how a fragrance smells, I absolutely cannot tolerate it bc of the MCS....and there are actually a lot of people with MCS
    [This Message was Edited on 12/25/2009]
  7. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    Actually there are a few places that have made it illegal to use fragrances(somewhere in Canada, I think, and a town in northern CA).....I am not really looking for that to happen, though bc in reality as you said, it is in so many things .....that said, they do make fragrance free products of almost every kind and though I notice with even the smallest amt, it does get worse when people add perfume or cologne to the mix....and in places with large gatehrings, it would be entirely possible to set aside a portion of the seats to be frangrence in places like Drs offices, it is being done more and more, so people should start to realize that it is a problem

    plus, it is not just an annoyance - it is a genuine physical health concern

    perfume is optional: breathing is not
    (this is my new mantra - time for me to have more bumper stickers made) (Obviously fragrances cause many other problems than just breathing ones, but that is the most basic and the one thing that no one can deny we need)
    [This Message was Edited on 12/25/2009]
    [This Message was Edited on 12/25/2009]
  8. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    I am very aware of Rich's protocol and had thought seriously about trying it....the thing is that I had already been taking some of the supps on my own and currently my body cannot tolerate them - they come rt back up, so I don't think I could do the protocol rt now

    as to the drops, I am sensitive to and/or allergic to more than 35 different things - the perfumes and colognes are the worst, but there are so many other things, too (and those are only the ones I can think of off the top of my head) way could my body (or my pocket book) handle taking that many in drops......I would be a little leery of those, too, though, bc with MCS repeated exposures tend to make people worse - they don't work quite the same as regular allergies

    I am sorry to shoot down your suggestions, though - I do appreciate that you are trying to help
  9. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    I had the same thought after church!
  10. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    thanks for understanding and replying.....are you around your MIL often?
  11. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    thinking about this more and honestly, it already sort of is a law that public places, work places, etc have to provide a fragrance free area if anyone with MCS might be otherwise unable to go there - this is an ADA issue of accessibility.....just bc many people have not yet caught on to this does not mean that they are not in violation of the ADA
  12. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    Bless you and your friends!! : )

    As to the lavender, I used to love it, can no longer handle it bc of the MCS....that said, I am glad that you can enjoy it, and I wish that others would take their cue from you - if they want fragrance, then they could still use it at home (and only at home)
  13. Wireless

    Wireless New Member

    That sucks. hugs...

    I get allergies to some of the most common flowers, air fresheners, perfumes, laundry detergents and soaps and shampoos and deoderants too.
  14. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    Thanks for all the does certainly make sense and is good to know....I will have to talk to my Dr more about this stuff - he is actually very good & I am so blessed to have found him

    the chelating thing scares me, though.....I am pretty sure that I would benefit from this, if it were done properly, but the possibility of winding up just moving the metals to another part of my body or sending more to my brain (which can happen) is really scary and everything I have read about the different ways to do it is controversial
  15. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    sorry you have to deal with this stuff, too....hugs back atcha : )
  16. caroleye

    caroleye New Member

    There isn't a chemical I'm not allergic to. Everything we use in our home is au natural.

    The rare time I go out, I wear sunglasses & a mask............sure people glare at me, but who cares. The kids get a kick out of it.............the innocent ones who are being poisoned by our chemical-laden society/world.

    And we question why so many are getting sick at a younger age?? Hmmmmmmm.........
  17. hi all,
    a sign of modern times in my town is this....

    my next door neighbours have turned their conservatories into wash rooms.

    when i go out of my back door,my dog and myself have sneezing fits.the air is strongly perfumed.

    the neighbours each side of me have dryer machines, for their laundry, in the conservatories,and perfumed air is chugging into the outdoors air.

    i cant even leave my door open else the smell comes into my house.i feel robbed of my basic human right..which is to breath in fresh air.

    it does make me angry,but i try to stay calm,i dont want raised blood pressure.

    take care all,fran.
  18. JLH

    JLH New Member

    I am so sorry that her scent spoiled your Christmas Eve. I have the same problem. I would have done the same thing--move to a different seat. If someone would have asked why I moved, I would have told them.

    Maybe she could not smell it on herself. People who have worn the same perfume for a long time normally can not smell it on themselves.

    Always keep an allergy mask in your purse, along with your inhaler!
  19. slammed

    slammed Member

    sorry to know of your bad church time; just when you're looking forward to some restorative energy, you were hit with an energy drain,right out of the blue. life isn't always fair, but it's too bad we have to walk around guarding against intrusions into our feeling well. you would think of church as a place you can go to for healing, not to get barraged by a perfume bomb.

    MCS hits out of the blue, wrecks me for hours afterwards: walking past the laundry detergents aisle in the market, car fumes on the freeway(especially diesels), women who bathed in perfume(or maybe forgot the bath,lol), or men drenched in cologne. . . all can wreck your day.

    Sorry about your invasive pew mate(pun intended).

    Hope you're feeling better now.
  20. Chelz

    Chelz New Member

    The same thing happens to me when I smell perfume. I work in a hospital, and thank goodness, most of the employees know that they should not wear heavy perfumes, but the general public does not know that.

    I can't tell you how many times I have had to avoid the elevator because some of the visitors stink it up with perfume. Somtimes I am forced to use the stairs, which with my FM isn't always a good idea. Not being able to breath is very bothersome for me, next is the dizzy, spacey, unreal feeling I get, headaches will soon follow.

    I just may have to write to Dear Abbey about this problem, everyone reads Dear Abbey right?, LOL. I know this subject is not funny, but seriously, something needs to be done about it. Hugs to you, Chelz.