Pithy sayings about computers.

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gapsych, Feb 28, 2009.

  1. gapsych

    gapsych New Member

    Please excuse the numbers. I could not copy the following without including them. I found this under "pithy sayings" and the computer jokes started with the first number which is not number one but number 42. There are also a few sayings unrelated to computers. Just deal with it, LOL!!

    42. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.

    43. COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key

    44. Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.

    45. 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.

    46. Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

    47. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.

    48. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.


    51. uh...

    52. Best file compression around: "DEL *.*" = 100% compression

    53. The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.

    54. BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding

    55. The name is Baud......, James Baud.

    56. BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!

    57. Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!

    58. C:\> Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.

    59. Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..

    60. Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"

    61. As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

    62. Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)

    63. Backups? We don' *NEED* no steenking backups.

    64. E Pluribus Modem

    65. >... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

    66. Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny

    67. A mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral available.

    68. An error? Impossible! My modem is error correcting.

    69. CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C (Y/n)?

    70. Does fuzzy logic tickle?

    71. A computer's attention span is as long as it's power cord.

    72. 11th commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's Pentium

    73. 24 hours in a day...24 beers in a case...coincidence?

    74. Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.

    75. Windows: Just another pane in the glass.

    76. SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .

    77. Who's General Failure & why's he reading my disk?

    78. Ultimate office automation: networked coffee.

    79. RAM disk is *not* an installation procedure.

    80. Shell to DOS...Come in DOS, do you copy? Shell to DOS...

    81. All computers wait at the same speed.

    82. DEFINITION: Computer - A device designed to speed and automate errors.

    83. Press -- to continue ...

    84. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue....

    .85. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...

    86. ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

    87. E-mail returned to sender -- insufficient voltage.

    88. Help! I'm modeming... and I can't hang up!!!

    89. All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?

    90. Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

    91. "640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981


    93. Hidden DOS secret: add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS

    94. Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!

    95. Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...

    96. Excuse me for butting in, but I'm interrupt-driven.
  2. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Some of these are very funny.

    I assume the ones I don't understand are funny too.



    (Smiling out loud)
  3. gapsych

    gapsych New Member

    I just do not know why you would think I would ever post anything funny? This post is very serious.

    I actually plagiarized the word "pithy" from you that is if you can plagiarize one word. If I misspell or switch a couple of letters, would that still be plagiarizing?

    I googled pithy sayings and found this among some other interesting things.

    Actually there were a few of the above I did not understand. I will have to find their numbers and see is someone can help out here.

    I am glad you explained what SOL means. I thought it had something to do do with talking in your sleep. (Sleeping Out Loud)

    [This Message was Edited on 02/28/2009]
  4. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    You are quite right. I was mistook to think you were being humeral. Like me,
    you are a very serial person.

    Although I am not absolutely certain, I believe if one alters the material that
    is the subject of the plagerization, it would constitute a situation sometimes
    referred to as mis-plagerization.

    (Webster's Compendium of standard abbreviations indicates the following is
    the accepted form: msplgrzatn.)

    I attempted to duplicate your feat of searching for pithy sayings, but did not
    have much in the way of results. Possibly due to the fact that my pith
    helmet is at the cleaners.

    'Member that old novelty tune "Talkin' in Ma Sleep"? It was popular about the
    time I was riding a Big Wheel only they didn't have Big Wheels back then.

    Went somethin' like this:

    Just last night I was talkin' in ma sleep.
    I dreamed I was Peter Pan,
    And you were miss Bo Peep.

    And then something, something,
    And barbequed a sheep.
    Something, something
    Always love you.

    Think the Andrews Sisters recorded it.

    Be sure to pith anymore post sayings.