Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Grandma6, Oct 9, 2005.

  1. Grandma6

    Grandma6 New Member


    and I wish I would have put it as a new post becaue I would really like everyone to read it because I think it is something that will benifit ALL.

    So, that is why I am posting here so if you all would be so kind to go to MamaDove's message "I NEED HELP" and read the reply from Grandma6 I would appreciate. I know this is a wierd way to do this and if I would have just posted a new message to begin with, but I never said I was smart. :) LOL

    Thank you all so much

    Gentle Hugs
  2. rileyearl

    rileyearl New Member



    I have said "enough is enough" more than once. I have stayed in bed for weeks at a time telling my family to just leave me alone and go on with your life because I felt and still do feel at times that I am holding my husband back from enjoying all the things that we had dreamed about doing when we got married over 31 yrs ago The guilt is proably what gets me down the most. Guilty of having to stop working and not contributing financialy but causing financial problems with all the meds & all, guilt of having my husband have to carry most of the burden, guilt of not being able to do the things we should be doing together. And I feel like I am useless. But then something happened last week that changed my views on this.

    A friend of mine that I haven't seen or talked to in a long time called me one evening & wanted me to know that she noticed how compasionate my grand dgt is, (she's 7 yrs old). This friend works at a rest home & my grand dgt. goes there with her Brownie troop & my friend said that she thinks because of my illness that Valerie is so caring to people who she sees in pain. Out of all the girls in her Troop the employees at the rest home all noticed how caring she was & how loving, & helpful & just reached out to the residents there.

    I guess I needed this to open my eyes and realize that maybe there is a reason for me to be in pain and the Lord is using me to develope in my grand dgt. a human being with such wonderful traits to care for folks in pain. Hopefully she will always be compasionate to those with health problems and God only knows the world needs more like her.

    On Friday Valerie got off the bus here & she told me they had a vistor at school today. Her teachers Mom came by the school and she said that "She was one of Gods special people". I asks her what she meant by this and she said, "Well, Grandma she has one arm that is real real short". I ask her is she had been in an accident and she said, "NO, the Lord just made her special". Then she went on to see if I needed her to do anything around the house because I was in bed having a bad flare-up.

    I was so proud of her because even though this Lady was different, she accepted her without a second thought. (I am going to call her teacher and thank her for this because I needed this "wake up call".) So now, I can say that I do have a purpose on this earth and I so want to be around to see all 5 of my grandchildren, (we have another due in Jan), to grow up & maybe by me having FMS & them seeing my pain will help to instill in their little minds to show compasion for those that are not as healthy as they are. I do love being a Grandma & we could all learn from this. Learn that little eyes are watching us & learning from us so set a good example.

    Maybe this story isn't the right response to your email but I know this has helped me to see things in a different way and I hope it will helps others.

    I'll keep you in my prayers,
    A Very Proud Grandma


    Dear Grandma,

    How lucky you are to have her there to teach you things! My little boy is like that, too. Last year when he was three, he told me he has a "take care bone" in his thumb and it make him able to care for people who are sick.

    He still wants to be a fire fighting gorilla when he grow up, but that may change!

    Would you like me to copy your post here, so people can find it easier?

    Thanks so much for your story!


    [This Message was Edited on 10/09/2005]
    [This Message was Edited on 10/09/2005]
  3. jbennett2

    jbennett2 New Member

    I had not read the post previously. What a beautiful, caring granddaugher you have. You have something to be proud of.
  4. MamaDove

    MamaDove New Member

    Hi Grandma6,

    I am so glad you responded to my post the way you did...My post had many "layers" to it, just like these DD's seem to have...There is no ONE way to look at things, to find answers you must look at every possibility...
    We all need to feel we have a reason to be, to contribute, to participate, to help people in their time of need...We are the unselfish ones, a rare breed especially in today's times...That is why we have concerns that most don't consider and although we feel as crummy as we do, our focus is geared more toward the ones we love...

    In my case, my past, the beast that it was, showed me to have compassion for others, esp. with disabilities...I tend to internalize others problems whatever they may be,and although that may not be healthy in and of itself, I have the opportunity to learn from them or help where I can...Your granddaughter is certainly benefitting in quite the same way...She will most likely grow up with a compassion for all others or at the very least, a PASSION for something that will certainly help others along the way...

    I have yet to meet anyone with these DD's that wasn't passionate, symapthetic to others or selfish in any way...It goes with the territory!!!

    I am glad you learned something from your granddaughter, gifts like that are few and far between but as long as we SEE them when they come, it makes life worth living...

    As much pain as I am in today, I am thankful to be writing this...My posts may inspire others like their posts do me.
    Like someone said in a recent post, she was blessed to have this DD, it made her stop and smell the roses instead of keeping up that fast paced (going nowhere) lifestyle...
    We are all gathering here to help eachother and I think that's the greatest gift of all!

    I rambled a bit, didn't I? In a fog like most days, but I think I spit out what I needed to...Keep posting...Someone is watching... ~ALICIA
  5. Grandma6

    Grandma6 New Member

    I'm not real good at figuring how to post on this message board so I would really appreciate it if you could copy ant post it here for me.

    As for your little fire fighting guy, I know what you mean. My husband is the Fire Chief of our Volunteer Fire Dpt which he and I helped reorganize years ago and is a real passion of ours and our youngest grandson, 3-1/2, plays frieman all the time. Really, he is going to be anything that his PaPa is going to be. That boy thinks the sun sets and rises by his PaPa. EX: If PaPa puts salt on something at the dinner table then he has to have it: yesterday he started upsnapping his jeans and I asks him what he was doing and he said, "I gotta push my shirt in my pants like PaPa does". I told my husband that if he picked up some doggy poop and ate it I think Clay would do the same thing. :) LOL

    The other two who are between Valerie and Clay or Cody-6yrs & Colton-5yrs. I don't know how my dgt does it with those 4 so close in ages, especially the first three. (remeber: Valerie/7 - Cody/11 months later - 6 & Colton/12 months later - 5 then Clay 3-1/2) They are a handful but they are such loving kids and the little one is so mature for his age and I have never seen one with so much imagination.

    They are such a joy to have around and they only live 6miles from us and we see them alomost every day. They call me every night & tell me goodnight just before they say their prayers.

    Their Mom works in rehabilatation so they have been around folks with health problems all their lives which is another reason I think they don't really see a difference in people.

    Before my Mom passed away, (in Feb. which I am still having a very - very hard time coping with), they loved to go see her and help her. It's like it is just a part of their lives to help people. Recently there was a lot of talk about my husbands work selling out and wages changes and Valerie told her PaPa that she had some money if he needed it. It amazes me as to how indepth she is to things around her.

    Being a Grandma is one of the hi-lights of my life.

    Take Care and God Bless,