Pls come in and read ( I need help ) plus: What Dr. said

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Kacjac, Jun 17, 2006.

  1. Kacjac

    Kacjac New Member

    Hi everybody.....
    First of all, thanks for coming in here and reading.
    I didn't really have a clue how to title my post!
    I have been having a really bad week.
    Let me begin with the fact I had to have a biopsy done, so that I can find out if I have cancer or fibriods. Either way, a hysterectomy's coming! Sigh!
    As I'm driving home, I talk to DH on cell, and I'm crying so bad, I can hardly talk to him, long story short, he goes on to his appt. then on to another prior engagement. I would have at least thought, he would have called me to say, do you need me, can I bring you something home for supper, nope, nothing... I finally ate that night at 8:30.
    Plus I'm a 24/7 caregiver, so I had to deal with it, by myself!
    My husband is a good man, but geez.....seem's to be in his own little world lately!
    I am very hurt still, so now we have been arguing constantly until today.
    I go see my PCP, and he tell's me he doesn't believe my Rhuemy should have labeled me a Fibro pt. without first doing lab work. All he did at the time he diagnosed was the trigger point test.
    My PCP runs ton's of blood work on me, including ANA's, it comes back elavated, at the time, when the nurse called I was kind of shocked, so I didn't even think to ask her the level. Now I go back to the Rhuemy, cause he's the expert, but my PCP, knows of my Hashimoto's, so that alone could be why it's elavated. But I may have something else!
    My neck, shoulder's and back hurt so bad, sometimes, I just want to scream, and I do alot of crying too. Hormone's are crazy!
    I started my massage therapy again, thank God!
    Any comments, advice or just hugs, are all welcome!
    Sorry this is long, thx for letting me vent!
    Hug's & Blessing's to all, Karen
  2. kalaya

    kalaya New Member

    Goodevening love I can see for you this has been a physical as well as emotionaly draining time and I do wish that I had something beyond a gentle word to pick you up.Life can be intensely trying far to often and what we want is sanctuary, some place to find comfort even amongst all the pain.God is able to carry you through this and I know those can sound like hollow words when you are in the depth of the valley the reality is you hurt and would like the hurt to leave 5 hours ago.
    I will say a prayer for you and ask God to be generous to you with his joys and that he would give you an avenue out of your suffering and a light heart.God bless.Be well.
  3. Kacjac

    Kacjac New Member

    Such a heartfelt,comforting reply!
    Yes, God is with me, he won't leave me nor forsake me.
    Thank you for your prayer's. I will need all I can get sent!
    From your lips to His ears!
    Blessings, Karen
  4. mrsjethro

    mrsjethro New Member

    Hi Karen,
    I'm Debbie. Nice to meet you and I wish it were under better circumstances. I'm here for you and if there is anything that I can do to help please let me know.
    ((((((((here's a bunch of gentle hugs for right now)))))))

    When I learned about 9 years ago that I was going to have an emergency hysterectomy, I was in the hospital already with other complications and there was no one with me. I was married at that time too. When they came in and gave me the news, there was this wonderful nurse that had come in the room with the doctor. Seeing that I had no one with me, she sat very patiently on the side of my bed and held me while I cried. I was devestated. I don't have any children and I was only 31 at that time. I thought that my entire world was crashing down around me and that my life was over.

    Now, after telling you that.... I don't have a monthly cycle to have to worry about, no feminine products to buy every month, no contraception to worry about, no cramps, no bloating and swelling, and no PMS any more. I look at it now like it has really been a blessing to me. But I didn't see it that way then.

    It was a very emotional time for me. I had so many fears and I knew nothing absolutely about it. It took me a little while to adjust to the hormone replacement after the surgery. I had a complete hysterectomy and they took everything. Now I take a hormone injection once a month and I like it so much better than taking the pills every day.

    I guess I just wanted to share part of my story with you so that you would know that to a certain extent, I can remember how you must be feeling right now. If there is anything that I can do (other than hugs and prayer, which I will be doing anyway) please let me know.
    (((((((((bunches of hugs and love))))))))))))
    Debbie
    [This Message was Edited on 06/17/2006]
  5. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    i did have one live born...and had lost a couple others thru miscarriages...

    but i am sorry for any pain this has caused you karen...

    hang tough...i have had a lifetime of ovarian cyst surgiers and then i had to go for biopsy in my uterus...i had polyps..oh boy the bleeding would never end...for months...then i had the surgery...they really scraped out and lazered my uterine lining out...what a difference it made...

    and i had no cancer...but i think those little buggers are trying to grow back....oh well..

    take care...

    jodie
  6. Kacjac

    Kacjac New Member

    Can ya tell I'm a Texan? LOL
    Thx for sharing stories, like MrsJethro did!THx Jodie also!
    Really though, thx for the comfort you all are sending me,Ya'll are good medicine..... I'm really Okay about the surgery, it's the marital thing, and elavated ANA test that has me hyped now. Yeah, I'm looking forward to no more periods,cramping, clots, heavy feeling etc. I have a great, caring GYN.
    I'm just trying to do Internet research on ANA's right, now, as I'm finding out more about Hysterectomy's too.
    I'm a reseach addict....better'n food huh? Got that problem too, not even going there......I am a lifetime dieter.
    I am going to hang in there, and hold my head high, I've been eating right, and after surgery, start a walking program again.
    Love & hugs, Karen
    [This Message was Edited on 06/18/2006]
  7. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    do you get to have the vaginal historectomy? or the traditional pelvic incision?

    i sould have a zipper on my abdomen...from all of the surgeries i have had...

    i have heard that like the first month you may have some gas and bloating when you come home...no vacuuming for like two months...

    my mil)ex) had hers a few years back and i was able to help clean her house and stuff...we are still close...she is a really cool ex mil..to have...i know she loves her messed up son...so i try to respect that one..but she is 2500 miles away from her son so she doesn't get to see the real bipolar son...

    she said she hasn't missed any of her parts...and most women i know say the same...

    you will be fine...and they will keep you comfortable as possible...

    for the gas...drink coca cola and buy some thin mints...it helps get that gas going...burping and the other end...

    my mom is a retired rn w/fibro and depression etc...

    hugs
    jodie
  8. Kacjac

    Kacjac New Member

    I don't know which one I'll have, cuz I need a bladder tuck too. Im going to ask for the burch procedure on my bladder. I can't wait to see him, so we can discuss all this, I am so surprised how calm I am about the surgery because I have had panic/anxiety problems in the past, at hospitals and with procedures. Im a big baby....but I know they'll give me something for nerves, and my GF's tell me I will feel so much better! Glad your's went well! I have a cool MIL too, in fact she will come stay with me, Im a 24/7 caregiver too, and will need help! She's his stepmom, but you would never know the difference, the other "real" well she's a she-devil! Im sorry but its true! She is awful, we haven't spoken in 20 years!
    Hugz, Karen
    [This Message was Edited on 06/18/2006]
  9. 1975jet

    1975jet New Member

    I will say Prayers and give you hugs- know that things will be better for you, this is Gods way so you do not suffer....


    HUGS
    Janet
  10. janieb

    janieb New Member

    going through.

    I'm a real people person and caregiver. When I'm worried about my hubby, I go to the doctor with him, take extra good care of him, give him his meds, etc. Even though he is very capable of doing all this himself.

    His thoughts, feelings are more internalized. He rarely talks to me about anything important, unless it's really important and when I want/need something from him, I must ask! However, he can't wait to bring me the first flowers he finds.

    We're all different and it's difficult to learn to live with this personality type. I've been practicing for 43 years. Sometimes I feel disappointed, because he doesn't show his concern, unless I tell him I need him.

    It seems the idea of setting aside a time and having a talk with him with be a good idea. You got some good advice in an earlier posting. Remember to be calm and try to fight fair. The calmer I am with my husband, the better he responds. Attack never works with him.

    Some days we feel like the maid, cook, housekeeper, well you get the point.

    Let us know how it works out, but don't keep it bottled up until the marriage is over.

    Blessings,

    janieb
  11. Jordane

    Jordane New Member

    So sorry hun that you are having a rough go of it!!

    Some Men just dont understand, they love us but are quite lost in the knowing of what we need in the emotional dept.

    ** THIS IS NOT A PUTDOWN ALL YOU GUYS!!!!**

    hugzz
    Jordane
  12. Kacjac

    Kacjac New Member

    Things are somewhat better with hubby!
    Things are worse with my little lady, I take care of...
    I see the Dr. friday, about bloodwork, a bladder test, and talk about surgery at that time.
    But the good news is, got biopsy results today, they were normal!
    PRAISE GOD!
    Thanks for everyone, caring, friendly, helpful advice!
    Ya'll are the B-E-S-T!
  13. starmom

    starmom New Member

    My hubby gets really weirded out when we talk about anything to do with the female reproductive system or sex. Esp if our kids are around. While I am frank and open and answer questions no matter what. It can make for some friction.

    I am sorry he was so insensitive. My hubby was not very great when I was going through the things that led up to my hysterectomy.

    BUT.. as tiem got closer he got better, until the actual hospital stay. NEVER again will he take me to the hosp for a medical procedure or surgery. I will either have my mom take me or go alone!! He was SO totally FREAKED, as I believe many men are. We take care of them, so anytime we are down, esp with something they CAN'T understand, they lose it. NOT all guys, just many.

    We had already decided not to have more kids as my body really had problems with my last pregnancy. I would have been VERY high risk in another pregnancy. So it was not hard for us on that score, though I understand it may be for you.

    My doc, with his inimitable way of putting things, gave me the choices and then recommended the hysterectomy by saying, "Why pay rent on the hanger if you aren't going to fly the plane and the hanger needs major renovations?"

    I had polycycstic ovaries (really bad), fibroids, and endometriosis. The mood swings from the hormones were really hard on my hubby and kids. And me.

    I had the vaginal hysterectomy, and had them take out the ovaries, uterus, cervix, and everything else. The recovery was not short, but was not too bad. My doc kept me comfy as possible and my family really pestered me to take it easy.

    since then it has been AWESOME!! No periods, no leaks, no bleeding one week out of every two, a lot less anemia to fight, so MANY FEWER mood swings, the sex is GREAT, and I am a nicer person!!

    I take estrogen only HRT, as my awesome doc recommended. He really is awesome, many people drive hours to see him, I ahve a short drive, only 2 hours!

    My doc truly believes that if you are able to listen to your body you can figure out your estrogen dose without lab tests. He will run any kind you want (blood, saliva, anything out there) but says that while one woman will feel fine with much lower levels of estrogen, another will feel crummy until she gets to a much higher level. We know so little about women's bodies, medically speaking, that he lets me adjust my HRT as MY body says it needs it.

    No more PAP smears, no risk of uterine, ovarian, or cervical cancer - all of which run in my family! I have had no adhesions, and I had endometriosis all over my gut!

    I used to get a yeast infection with ever period - only had 3 in hte 3 years since my surgery!! And those are b/c I took antibiotics and no probiotics!

    I have no more period migraines, what a $$$ saver!!

    All I can say is that, having had my kids, the hysterectomy was the BEST thing I have ever done for myself AND my family.

    If I hadn't had kids, we would have adopted. I was told as a teen that my reproductive system was too messed up to get pg, so we had already planned that. Glad dh has some strong little swimmers, but there were always options in our minds.

    I hope this helps you figure out what it right for YOU. Just b/c it helped me doesn't mean it will be right for YOU.

    Hugs,

    Susie
  14. Kacjac

    Kacjac New Member

    All my friends are saying the same thing,that you are..... it's the best thing they ever did they say....so I'm going with you guy's....<wink>
    And I'm also gonna share the hanger story with my Doc, if thats alright? That was Funeeeeee! LOL