PORCH #923 (9/27/16) IS NOW CLOSED

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Mikie, Sep 27, 2016.

  1. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Good Morning, Dear Porchies,

    I hope all y'all slept well and arise feeling all bright eyed and bushy tailed. It's too early for me to say. I just hope I don't have the nausea today so I can go out to mail my order for my Rx's. If I don't do it, I'll run out. At least, I still have plenty of my BP pills and they are the most important. I have to order more pregnenalone and Super-B Supplement from PH here. I did get my bills paid yesterday so that's not hanging over my head. I have to renew the magazines I get for my kids and me. Wish I could take a wee vacation from life but, even if I do zone out for a few days, the housework and obligations continue.

    I'm not going over to the pool today. I'll try to get there tomorrow if it doesn't rain. I have more urgent things to take care of today. My ex called me yesterday because he's upset that this kidney thing isn't resolved yet. I tried to 'splain to him that there is a wide range of recovery times which are 'normal.' He was waiting outside in the car while his now wife was seeing the doc. She can barely walk by herself and falls often. I would think he would want to be with her. Good grief!

    Rock, my eye doc tells me that our eyes are only the lenses through which we see. We actually see with our brains. It's my mind's eye which is stuck with the omnipresent pic of the nude statue. I might have to be brainwashed to get that pic outta there. I didn't watch the debates because I couldn't stay awake and because I don't need the stress. I finished watching Prison Break and started watching Season 3 of Transparent. It has won an Emmy or Emmies. Jeffrey Tambor is excellent but the story often seems disconnected or strange. I think there's a lot of gratuitous sex as well. Other times, it is spot on in portraying people whose lives have been turned upside down, leaving them scrambling to deal with the issue and their unmet needs. This is family dysfunction on steroids. Makes my family look downright normal.

    Granni, thanks for your kind support for my continuing kidney stone problems and how sick it continues to make me feel. This too shall pass--literally. Thank you also for your sweet words about my granddog. I know the kids are having a difficult and sad time. My ex got the text while shopping and he said he broke down and cried. Everyone loved Nigel the dog. I laughed when I saw that you typed that your DH needed a hair cute. I'm sure that after the hair cut he does look cute. The doc looks through my hair at my scalp when I have my skin check. I think they are pretty good at finding any suspicious things. She did say my scalp was bright red. Well, I took a hot shower and blew my hair dry with a hot hair blower so that could be the problem. I looked it up online and found that sensitivity to products can cause it. The advice was to see the dermatologist. Doh!!! She is a dermatology physicians asst. If she mentions it again, I'll tell her that's one of the reasons I'm there. I hope your DH's doc didn't find anything.

    I'm off to read the virtual newspaper. Have a good day, everydobby.

    Love, Mikie
    Last edited: Sep 27, 2016
  2. Starlight74

    Starlight74 Well-Known Member

    Been a little while since I've been in, but I've been so outta whack since I got back, I can't seem to get my head straight.
    Anyways, I got to thinking that that may be a bit of a pipe dream- trying to get my head straight, so here I am.

    Come to think of it, I wonder where the term 'pipe dream' comes from... Red Indians perhaps?
    May look it up or put that down with the millions of other things, on my 'to do' list...

    Mum and I ended up staying one more night in the cabin and DH and Treasures stayed two more in the camp grounds.
    The extra night was to avoid another massive downpour and a repeat of driving through flooded countryside, which was a good decision, but the drive back was unavoidable. We could only delay by one more night because my Mum had to catch her flight on Friday.
    Just because we had to be back didn't mean DH and Treasures had to feel short changed.
    In one way I was happy for them to stay, as I'd have a chance to recover, without the pressure of having to cook etc.
    they were happy as it meant more time to catch the big fish!

    Did I tell yas that on arrival they gave us a discount ?and they moved us into a nicer cabin, free of charge.
    I was a little concerned about being slogged with full price, for the extra day, but in actual fact, we got half price!

    I tell ya what though, what a difference sleeping in a cabin makes!
    It paid off all round, because even though I was really achy and tired, I was able to utilise the fully contained kitchen and prepare meals.
    The tribe would come over in the mornings for breakfast and things were fairly organised, despite sometimes atrocious weather. At least I could supervise full stomachs. It wasn't easy, but I felt like I was doing something useful.
    Because DH and Treasures were out late, I'd drive out to the warf (where they were putting in a huge effort, chasing shark ), with or without my Mum and dish up tea.

    DH has a really good set up now with a cooking /hot top/bbq , that he fitted in the back of his 4 wheel drive. (Really made up for his stolen/wrecked one)
    He rigged the cooker up so it slides out on runners.
    He also has water on tap, stored in pipe and lights out the back and side and car fridge/freezer.
    Well, all of that came in handy that's for sure.

    I'm not really into fishing, even if my wrists and the rest of me could handle it, but I do take my job seriously.
    Yes. I take the photos and video( try to) and am the cheer squad.

    I would make the hot chocolates there on the spot and serve up whatever I'd cooked up back at the cabin.
    Lasagne one night, curry another. Sometimes salad rolls.
    Funny thing is, before we even got there, DH was wanting a nice, hot curry.
    One of the first things I noticed when bringing our gear in, was a sign saying curry was not permitted in cabins, due to lingering, pungent odour.
    I hooked up the crockpot out on the deck, but well out of sight, so we could still have our curry without breaking any rules. DH was happy.

    I had to prepare separate meals for my mum ,because she only eats plain food.
    When she comes to visit, she really makes the most of her holiday and as much as I love her, it gets tiring running around after her all day, aswell as my lot. Two weeks can feel like a big stretch. She drinks a ton of coffee too.

    She gave me a bit of a scare ,as her breathing has become more laboured. This is the result of a lifetime of smoking. She gave up about 15 yrs ago, but her lungs didn't recover. If anything her breathing appeared to be worse.
    Anyway, she'd picked up a bit of a cough, thanks to her stay at my sister's place, previous to mine.
    It was a job just trying to keep her from breathing in the cold air, particularly at night, as it'd trigger a coughing fit.

    One time it was so bad, I asked her if I should take her to the hospital. She was drenched in sweat, white as a ghost. I had just returned from grabbing a few things in the shop and to see her like that, frightened the life out of me. Initially I thought she may've had a fit, as she's epileptic.

    When she gets home, she's going to find about 'safety link'. Wearing a bracelet or necklace that can set off an alarm if pressed, to alert the ambulance. I think if she doesn't check in daily, they, on failing to hear from her, notify relevant people then also.
    She's really unhealthy now and has gained a lot of weight.
    Apparently my brother and sister hassel her about it, so I won't, but it certainly has me worried.

    If my mum came out, to watch the fishing, I'd prepare her chair and wrap a massive quilt around her. I also had her wearing a knitted beanie and jacket and gloves. Every so often the umbrella would need to be opened up, but for the most part, she stayed warm and dry.

    So between keeping up with washing, cooking, cuppas, a lot of time behind the wheel and my mum, I was busy.

    Looks like I've typed a novel, so perhaps I'll call it a night and come back tomorrow.

    I have been reading and catching up with all your lives and am
    Thinking of all of you.

    Take care.
    Catch yas later.
    Mikie likes this.
  3. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Hi Kids

    Nice to see you posting again, Star. Sounds like you had a great camping trip.
    The treasures will have happy memories. Your DH did a great job fixing
    up the 4 wheel drive for camping convenience. Maybe you can post some
    of your pics here.

    Pipe Dreams comes from the fantasies of folks who smoked opium in
    pipes. I read that in China they used to have rooms with beds for rent
    just for opium smokers.

    Pipe Dream was also a musical in the 50s. Despite the fact that it was
    by Rodgers and Hammerstein it was a flop. I used to have the cast
    recording. Only one good song and no Broadway stars. What did they

    Mikie, never heard of Jeffrey Tambor until the Larry Sanders show. Gary
    Shandling, Tambor and Rip Torn were all brilliant. Too bad the show
    wasn't on the air longer. Or maybe it was on, and I just didn't know about
    it soon enough. Great scripts.

    So what did you think of the great debate? What did all of you guys think?
    I think we can discuss it without being partisan or hysterical. Or maybe
    Pro Heath thinks otherwise. Anyhoo, I only watched 15 minutes.

    Nothing on the calendar for today thus far.

    Hugs, Folks
    Mikie and Starlight74 like this.
  4. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Well-Known Member

    Good morning everydobby,

    DH is at his tuesday meeting and so I have to computer to myself in between chores. Not sure when he will be back if he will go out to lucn with the guys or not this time. Also getting ready for our concert tonight Mickey Mouse shirt and all :)!!! Not coughing much any more but there is still some stuff in there I know so I am a continuing the Mucinex.

    STAR - Nice to hear from you and glad you had a greata time camping or everyone did and you manaaged it ok with the cabin. That brings me back to the days when we used to camp. We had a travel trailer so it wasn't so bad most of the time. We did cook some outdoors tought and ate outside too when the weather was good. At that time we had hoped to travel in our later years with a lovely motor home but it when push came to shove we decided not to go that root. The kids were no longer there to want to do their things. It did enable us to do alot of traveling with 5 kids that we never would have been able to do on our own. Glad everyone got to do what they wanted for the most part and had a good time.

    ROCK - I watched very little as I had practice last night and then shower and all to get ready for tomorrow. I knew I would get a synopsis from DH. I am not going to say much as I am afraid I might open mouth insert foot as they say :)!! LOL Thanks for the explanation of PIPEDREAMS. I just figured it meant imagination.

    DH just popped in no lunch out so have to get off. More later maybe. Thinking of everyone esp JULIE and her problems.

    Love to all,
    Last edited: Sep 27, 2016
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  5. lydia1

    lydia1 Well-Known Member

    Hi everyone...I can't say "Good Morning" since it's almost 1:00 pm...rough night, I guess. Actually, I got to sleep fairly early...but woke up around 4:00 am with a terrific sinus headache that quickly turned into an "all over" headache.. Spent two hours trying to get it under control (meds, breathing in steam from water boiling on the stove, massage, etc., etc.) Finally got back to sleep, but stayed in bed till after 10:00...sigh.

    Headache still there, at the fringes, but I'm trying to get a few things accomplished. As many of us experience at times, I am so disappointed in my mind and body...and my lack of ability to do what I feel I need to do.

    Rock, we can always count on you for the origins of things...and always interesting. I didn't watch the debate, so can't really comment about it. Reading some of the "reviews" of it...it sounds similar to what we are going through as we settle Gpa's estate. Lots of "he said, she said".

    Granni, hope your concert goes well...and your voice holds out. I'm glad you got to do a lot of traveling/camping. We used to go with our girls too...Amy and Clinton now have a nice pop-up camper and they always seem to have a fun, relaxing time.

    Mikie, hope you get to do some of the things on your list today. Sounds like your ex has a lot of guilt, huh? So sorry about his current wife.

    Star, I don't even know what to say to you...your post brought tears to my eyes. How you feel as rough as you do...but still take such good care of your family, including your visiting mama. I can't even imagine, although I've been there, too. Makes me wonder if I could pull myself together now, if I still had kids at home. So glad you all got to go, and your DH and kids got to spend extra time at the end...then you got at least a tiny bit of rest before they all came home. I'm thinking that cabin was a life saver...and how nice to get the upgrade.

    Will say a quick "Hi" to everyone else...Sun, if you happen to get online, I so hope you are feeling well enough to enjoy your visit with your son.

    I just roasted some beef bones, then will boil them later to make some bone broth. Fixed cornbread for tonight's supper while I had the oven on. Cooking rice and will put together a chicken/rice soup in the crockpot...we may get another load of firewood this evening, so will be nice to have supper already ready to eat. Our weather is so nice this week...much cooler, and I love it!

    Had to turn off the oven earlier and run to town (15 minutes away). The preschool teacher at our church had more things to sell since the preschool/daycare closed. I got a bunch of stuff for Lindsey earlier, but there were still some things left. The teacher texted me that she was at the church building if I wanted to come over, so I decided to drop what I was doing and go. I also had a box of Gpa's things for the Lord's Cupboard...well, not food...but unopened packages of disposable underwear and some waterproof pads for a bed. Had been wanting to get that stuff out of my way and where someone could actually use it.

    Anyway, I'd better try to get busy. Still want to work outside a bit...making room in one building for things that are in another building...so we can use THAT building to store firewood. Den says we need 10 pickup loads of firewood...we have five so far. But only one load has been split...thank goodness we have a log splitter. Just wish I had more stamina to do that kind of work, lol!
    Starlight74 likes this.
  6. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Well-Known Member

    Splitting wood, you have got to be kidding, JULIE :)!! I could never do that either, even when I was younger, I don't think. At east with the pain I have. Maybe if I didn't have any pain, ha :)!

    Glad that you got rid of some of the stuff you had fr G pa that could be used for others. So sorry for the headache. I understand. Not sure if what I have is O A, FM, sinus too or what but sometimes feels like my head is going to explore.

    STAR - Yes, it sound like you are doing a great job with those treasures. I also tried to do so as much as I could to with the pain and all. Keep it up sweetie and keep on hanging in there.

    I probably should go take a nap but have to go practice with our small group . Our leader always wants us tp practice even if we have a performance of the chorale tonight.. We have mentioned it to her before but she pays no head she wants a good performance but I know it is frustrating when some don't bother to come to practice,

    Has anyone heard of the Christmas song, " No Golden Carriage, No Bright Toy?" I had never heard of it before but U tube has it to check on. That is the one NEW song she wants us to learn for our Christmas Song. It is a sweet song tells THE story of the real Christmas. No presents !!! Except from the wise men of course. JULIE , have you heard of it?? Very catchy once you have heard it a few times. Now I have it running around in my head.

    Gotta run all of you dear ones, inc those not mentioned. Gotta get things together for this afternoon and tonight.

    Granni :)

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  7. lydia1

    lydia1 Well-Known Member

    This one, Granni? Pretty!

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  8. Starlight74

    Starlight74 Well-Known Member

    You guys are just what I needed.
    Pipe dreams indeed. Thanks Rock!
    Kinda thought it was druggie related...

    I'm feeling a bit bummed out.
    It seems my body is doing, dare I say it? The inevitable...
    It's crashed. I've been fighting it, but today is just so tough. Too tough.
    In fact, I'm typing this in the bedroom, as the noise and simple act of just sitting, hurts.
    So pathetic.

    Sun, you're off to Portland and I've only just got back from Portland.albeit different parts of the world, but still ...

    Julie, I know and feel that exact frustration and annoyance you mentioned.
    There's a ton of stuff I wanna do, but this wretched body!...
    Ugh. I guess we here are all in the same boat. (It sux, as I would say When I was a rebellious teen. )

    Julie, I'm so , so sorry you have all that extra stress in your life.
    I hate confrontation and I am the type of person who does worry myself sick. I get rotten headaches, can't sleep , sometimes upsets my stomach etc too.
    I remember going through a bunch of drama a couple of yrs back- it got so bad I was walking around the house dry-reaching!

    That sort of toxic crap steals your joy and robs from the 'abundance of life' you are meant to have.
    And I'm not like my DH, who's answer to Everything is, 'just don't think about it'.

    Is there any way you guys can have it all wrapped up sooner?
    Hmmm. Or did you say something about waiting for crops?
    I'm sorry, I can't quite remember and I'm certain Ive missed out on reading some important factors.

    I know there's the principal and wanting to do your GPa justice (at least to his memory), but how is it even possible to be effective in your role, when you're sharing keys and that type of thing?
    To have to bite your tongue when you're getting the police called on you, rumours and finger pointing, slander, thieving, locks being tampered with, sabotage....?
    Out right harassment and no leg to stand on?

    Perhaps you should document all this?
    And are You carrying the brunt of this burden? Mostly emotionally alone ,over there?

    Obviously, when you get down to it, GPa had it together enough to see through things.
    He knew what he was doing and picked you to be just and upright, even under tough circumstances and it is what it is.
    I guess that is a massive honour and speaks volumes.
    So, if anything else, you can take a deep breath and hold your head high. It all comes out in the wash, as they say.
    I only wish it was all over and done with, for you guys. So you can focus on brighter days.

    We r barracking for You Julie. You are a good egg.
    Shake the dust off your feet, you are strong.

    Or maybe Take a leaf out of Springs book and maybe have a massage or get some more flowers to plant- whatever it is that gives You simple pleasure and helps you to get your body on track too.
    My continual over-thinking or replaying events is what does me in.
    Try and avoid putting yourself through that.
    I know it's all easier said than done, but we're here for you

    Mikie, I'm so sorry you're still suffering! I was so impressed to hear you've returned to the pool, only to read the fragments are still causing you misery. Oh and thanks for the heads up about avoiding certain naked statues. I really don't want to close my eyes to That at night, only to have it looming larger than life, like a pesky song that plays over and over in your head. Yuk. There was something else I wanted to mention, but it escapes me right now. Annoying. Oh that's right. Dreaming about the ex and reliving the emotional pain- hopefully when the rest of the stone gets banished, so will those hurtful remembrances and all the confusion that goes with it.

    Granni, how are you doing after the whole 'car meets motorcyclist' event? That'd certainly shake me up. Glad you're still singing and I watched the clip. Nice song too.

    Hiya Barry, I read along like you do,when I'm not feeling up to scratch.
    Last time we went to Portland with my Mil, we were fortunate. We got to see a whale and her calf fairly close into shore,aswell as seals and other wildlife, but the whales were definately the highlight.
    This time round, no whales, but we did see a baby?, well at the very least,a little seal playing in amongst all the fishing lines, trying to get a free feed
    and The highlight- a gorgeous, large koala.
    He casually strolled through the caravan park, stopping to scratch his bits and pieces and oh-so casually meandered on.
    I frantically located my phone to grab some pics. He wasn't showing his best side, at first, but after calling out to him, he was most cooperative and I got some doozies. He wasn't in the least perturbed by my stalking him and all so casually climbed a tree behind the cabin and promptly curled up and went to sleep.

    Rock, I did actually listen to some of the debate.
    Hilary made a comment about Trump wanting the economy to crash so that Trump could buy up at a good price.
    Wasn't exactly what I expected to hear in the debate, but then, our last political show down was pretty bitchy too. If you know what I mean. Instead of focussing on what they'll do for the country, all the faults and dirty laundry gets aired out. Not pretty.
    They both have issues I think, but I wouldn't want to put my foot in it eigther, as Granni said, so will leave it at that.

    Dianne, it's a real bummer having to bounce back from the number meds does to us and on us and side effects is always a given, but not a way to live. Seems illogical to trade one set of problems for another, doesn't it?hope you're feeling better soon.

    Elaine and Linda- a big g'day to you both, at whatever situation you find yourself in, I hope the sun is comfortably warm.

    Well, my head is still thumping and the wind is howling. Floods have moved to a different state and another state has to batten down the hatches as strong winds approach them.
    I officially have a spring cold-bug and am talking with nasal overtones. Yes. Very attractive ( not) and have to muster up the energy to sort out tea. Still school holidays and the show must go on!

    Take care
    Catch yas later!
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  9. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Good Morning, Dear Porchies,

    I guess my thinking I could just recover and get back to the pool regularly was a pipe dream. Yesterday, I mailed my Rx's to the mail order pharmacy. By the time I bathed, did my hair and makeup, and drove to the post office (I always send prescriptions Certified Mail with a receipt of delivery), I came home reeling with nausea. I probably should have taken one of the anti-nausea pills prescribed when I first got sick with the stones but they are $4 a pill and I don't want to depend on them. I can't drive when taking them because of the side effects; I don't want to feel all fuzzy brained. I'm fuzzy brained enough without drugs.

    I had a horrible flare of FMS pain in the afternoon. My kidney/back area hurt about as bad as it ever has. My entire body was hurting. I had opiods but opted just for some acetaminophen and went to bed. I slept deeply and woke feeling a bit better. This morning, I had passed just a wee bit of 'gravel,' as the nurse calls it. It's been 7 weeks since the stent was put in and 2 weeks since it was removed and I'm still passing frags. I've spent so much time dealing with stones that my last name should be, Mason. Today, I'm having the hot flashes associated with them. I had never realized that there were so many symptoms in addition to the pain.

    Something good has come from my being so sick. Having stones and passing them can cause depression and anxiety. I haven't had depression but my anxiety level has risen sharply. I feel insecure, scared and angry at times. Fortunately, I'm able to talk myself down and stay controlled. I always pray for an understanding heart, filled with forgiveness and mercy. I've recognized that a lot of Barb's behavior stems from her insecurity, fear and anger. She's always been a difficult person but perhaps her blood clot, stroke, heart attack and fractured femur have left her feeling so much anger and anxiety that she just went berserk afterward. She is trying to control herself now because her kids have told her she has to. Maybe what I can take away from my own misery these last few months is a better understanding of what she is feeling but on a lesser scale. I have always wished her well and now, I can empathize with her.

    I don't plan on watching any of the debates; it's just too stressful and I can't stay awake. I could DVR them but, by the time I'd watch them, I could just tune in to the main snippets and comments on the cable shows. I'll be so glad when this election is over with.

    Star, bless you for taking such good care of your Mum, DH and Treasures. I hope your crash clears up. It sounds as though everyone had as good a time as possible, considering the weather. I'm glad you have a better vehicle than the one you had stolen. That slide-out BBQ is soooo clever. Rest up, dear one, and get to feeling better. I hope you can post some pix. We'd all love to see them.

    Rock, as always, you are a fount of knowledge. I remember the term, Opium Dens. Today, people just take opiods. I have them but stay away from them, even with all the pain I've had with my stone problem. In other words, my stones haven't caused me to get stoned. I hate the feeling opiods cause and it boggles the mind as to why anyone would pay to feel that way. My Special K, on the other hand, causes feelings of peace and tranquility. I now only use it for tinnitus or severe sensory overload. Another good actor I enjoy is Larry David, the creator of Seinfeld. I used to get him and Jeffrey Tambor mixed up. Thanks for keeping us straight on terms and idioms.

    Granni, wish someone would video your Disney program. I'll bet you look adorable in your Mickey Mouse shirt. Be glad you're only practicing for singing and not for a presidential debate. In either case, I think I'd have a nervous breakdown beforehand. Good luck for the performance.

    Julie, I'm so sorry you got up with such a horrid sinus headache. When I have that, I either spray Nasacort up my nose or take acetaminophen and saline nasal spray. Warming the hands and icing my forehead also works for sinus headaches. Drinking coffee and/or eating a square of dark chocolate also helps. I guess I'd describe my aches and pains as a headache all over. The wee bit of Red Tide we have here doesn't help. I'm sure that, this time of year in your neck of the woods, there are a lot of allergens floating in the air. Yes, my ex has a lot of guilt over what he has done and regret of roads not taken in his life. It's a very sad situation. I do pray for them both. Take care and keep resting up until you feel better, Sweetie.

    I'm no longer making up to-do lists for my daily activities. I'll just do what can't wait and play the rest by ear or rear, as in 'getting my rear in gear.' Today, I need to order supps. I'll get my old trash cans over to the pool if I can. It doesn't look as though it'll rain early as it has for a couple of days. Sir Vester's new game is to scratch at the sliding glass doors and then refuse to go out. He just got a little help going out. He's giving me a dirty look. At least now, he has climbed up on his favorite perch out there and is enjoying the morning. Right now, I can't leave the vertical blinds open much beyond the time when the sun peeks over Joe's roof. It comes streaming right into my living room. Once it moves further south, I'll be able to leave them open more.

    I send my love, hugs and prayers to everydobby, here and MIA.

    Love, Mikie
    Last edited: Sep 28, 2016
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  10. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Well-Known Member

    Need to go and get ready for our luncheon.

    JULIE and MIKIE glad you liked the song. DH ran to the store and I have to start getting dressed. I am in my PJs and will have to put stuff away when DH gets back. Hope your headache is better JULIE.

    Speaking of ordering more supps I need to do that too along with clothes in the drier from yesterday.

    Will try and get back later.

    Love you awl,
    Granni :)
  11. lydia1

    lydia1 Well-Known Member

    Good morning, friends! Very quick note....I am feeling much better today. Actually, got more done yesterday than I had expected to, so that was a nice surprise. Mikie, your thoughts on Barb got me thinking...I was up early, so typed out a long post about why I think sis feels the way she does about life, me, etc,. etc. Decided to just print it out instead of post publicly...didn't add anything to this discussion, but helped me tremendously. Thank you for that.

    What I did realize is that it's not my fault she is unhappy...but for some reason I take her feelings onto myself...the far-away chiro has noticed this very thing when he does muscle testing. I sort of ignored it before, but now I realize that is, indeed, what's happening. Not sure why I feel responsible for her happiness, success, etc...giving myself more "power" than necessary, lol! Somehow I have also allowed her to manipulate me...as much, or more, than anyone else. Then, when I realized it (and she knew I realized it) she tried to manipulate me even more. No more guilt trips. Yes, I am happy and I have a good life...good relationships with her dad, my husband/her brother, my kids. But I have made good choices concerning each of them, and that's how it works. Always putting herself first and making poor choices, then complaining how people are mean to her and life isn't fair...hasn't worked out so good for her. Maybe she will realize that someday, maybe not. But it is no longer my concern. She is very toxic to me and the sooner she is out of my life, the better. Period.

    Anyway, I need to get outside. Den and I made a game plan for storing firewood (got load #6 last evening, only four more to go!) and that's something I am able to take care of during the day while he's at work. This will be the first year we have enough "ready to go" firewood, and it will be stacked inside so it doesn't get rain or snow on it...tarps don't work that well to keep it covered with our severe storms. Baby steps...even though we have been burning wood for years, lololol!!!!! He put an electric motor on the wood splitter so I can even do that by myself...but easier with two people, so I will probably wait for him to help (or do it himself.)

    I know none of this is earth shattering news, but I feel a weight lifting and that is life changing for me. Thinking of you all...hope your day is going as well as can be.
    Mikie likes this.
  12. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Hi, Kids,

    Granni, I'm getting a late start too. There is still one towel in my drier from days ago. I hope to change the bed today and do some other laundry. I did get the old trash cans over to the pool house restrooms. They are about the only decent thing in there. I think our board is going to consider redoing them. They need it. I ran into some friends over there but the landscapers were butchering the shrubs with their loud machines so we couldn't chat. Take care, my friend.

    Julie, what we know intellectually takes a bit longer to feel emotionally. Once we figure it out, it's a real 'Aha Moment.' I hope this helps to rid you of carrying around all that physical stress on your body and emotional pain in your heart. It takes time, even when we do have the Aha Moment, but it's huge progress and will continue to get better. Sis is what is called a person who externalizes everything. These people blame everything on others. They often try to lay blame on those who have been kindest to them. They usually mistake kindness for weakness and have rude awakenings when kind people refuse to be blamed. They end up even more lonely and angry with few people who want to be around them. We may be able to recognize that something in their lives explains their behavior but it's not our responsibility to fix their problems. It sits squarely on their own shoulders. If they don't do it, they become toxic. Again, it's sad. I'm just glad you are shedding some of the stress now that you are heading into the last lap of this journey. Indeed, a New Season is at hand. If I felt well and I were there, I'd help split the wood. We could have fun doing it. I'd make you laugh until we both fell over in the grass.

    I went inside Ilona's old condo to check on humidity. Everything was fine but I put two new little damp rid containers in there to keep mold from forming. I checked everything else and it was good. I started their car remotely so the battery doesn't die. I think her kids are coming down next month and will drive the car back up north.

    So far, nausea is better. I think I was sick yesterday so that the gravel could pass. It's like night and day but, because I've been so inert, I don't have much endurance. I'm huffing and puffing. Gotta go look to see what I need to order here. I order my acid relief supp from the other site. When I'm not feeling well, it's the little stuff like this that goes undone until I run out. I not only have no NRG but just have no motivation. Whine, whine, whine!

    I finished watching Transparent yesterday. There was a nice ending as the family members seem to stop thinking only of themselves and start to have some thoughts of empathy/sympathy for each other. They are all neurotic in a Woody Allen kind of way. I see that Netflix will air a six-part series with Woody Allen. These streaming channels are adding more and more original content. Also, they offer apps through which one can stream other channels. Some, like HBO, require subscribing but others, like TCM, are free. Only problem with TCM is that there is limited access to movies. I do better checking the guide and recording the ones I want to see which are currently showing. Reading, sleeping and watching TV are the only things which keep my mind off my pain and nausea. Thank God for them.

    BTW, I'm really enjoying reading Seven Eves about what happens when the moon explodes and starts further disintegration in orbit. So far, they have built a big colony around the space station with rings and pods which are sent up with rockets. They will grow food eventually to sustain them. No more rockets can be sent because the small stones entering the atmosphere on Earth have set it on fire and no one is expected to survive. The space colony is attached to a large meteor and they mine it for the iron. There is only minimal character development except for the colony which is almost like a character itself. I'm about 40 percent finished with it. Thank God for my Kindle. Many books are free or $1.99-3.99. I can also download books from the library but haven't needed to. I could never finish a book this big in two weeks.

    Gotta go check the supps in the store here. Hope all y'all have a good day. I also need to get lunch. I have some pot roast I can warm up. It's a precooked meal from the store but I can't be too choosy when I've been sick.

    Love, Mikie
    gb66 likes this.
  13. lydia1

    lydia1 Well-Known Member

    Thank you, Mikie...you always help me "make sense" of things...and can put it into words better than I can.

    Star, I forgot to answer you about getting the estate settled sooner. Yes, we have to wait for the crops to be taken care of at both farms...hay is done, but has to be sold. Beans have to be picked and sold. And I have to file a final tax return for the estate, pay final bills (attorney, etc.) We are hoping to avoid actually going to court, in front of a judge, but who knows...

    I have documenting everything, from our messed up padlock to blocking the shop door to make it hard for us to get things out, to the unnecessary calls to the sheriff about a stolen stock rack that has been right in her plain sight this whole time, and filing a claim in district court because we use a little electricity for lights when we are in the shop (I've told her we are willing to pay whatever the electric company would charge per kilowatt hour.) Then there is the boyfriend locking the other door so we can't get in, and the theft of a saw (while boyfriend was the only one who had a key to that padlock.)

    Actually, all this ridiculousness does is make them look bad...having it documented is to our benefit and the estate attorney is very much on top of things. Nothing they have done so far, other than stealing the saw, should be very stressful...but it is, anyway. Den is better able to "shut things off in his brain", but I am sure that once we're done, I will be able to "let it go." It is constantly on my mind right now, because I am the one who has to keep track of things and communicate with the attorney and authorities. Just typing up the reports of what they've done is very stressful, but it's got to be done.

    Anyway...I'd better get back to work.
    Starlight74 and Mikie like this.
  14. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Hi Kids

    Been asleep all day. I see Gordon went to the library; picked up 4 books.
    Subsequently the library sent us an e mail. We have 3 more books to pick
    up. Am currently reading a self help book. It is not a "think positive" book.
    More like think realistically. The author is psychiatrist, and the
    book is endorsed by other such doctors including the President of the
    psychiatric association. If you want to investigate, the author is
    Michael Bennett. I am not giving the title as it is X rated. (Serially.)

    Star, we had a video from Australia in the news today. Shows lots of
    crocodiles swimming at Cahills Crossing in the Kakadu National Park.
    It looks like the road collapsed. Vehicles are still able to use it though.
    Dozens of crocs swimming around the cars, wading birds nonchalantly
    fishing near the crocs. Those crocs BTW are bigger than any land carnivore.


    Julie, what kinda beans have to be picked? Soy beans? Never even heard of
    such when I was a kid. Now I read it's the number two crop; corn is first.
    October, when the fall colors are most spectacular will soon be here. My
    brother who just had the double hip surgery is thinking about driving from
    Oregon to Minnesota and back. A 72 year old man! Uff-da! I am not telling
    him it's a goofy idea. That would only make him more determined.

    Mikie, you are quite right about Aha moments. AKA an epiphany. Did you
    ever notice that aha is a palindrome? I found mention of a song titled
    Aha Aha. I wonder if it sounds the same if you sing it backwards. Anyhoo
    couldn't find the song on Youtube, but I found one titled Aha Aha EP.
    Don't bother to listen to it. It's 7 minutes of pounding on drums. Very likely
    causes brain damage if one listens to the whole thing.

    Your encounter with the stone has turned into an odyssey. Or maybe a saga.
    These last two months must seem like four. At least!

    Gotta go kids. Been here an hour; can't sit any longer.

    Starlight74 and Mikie like this.
  15. Starlight74

    Starlight74 Well-Known Member

    Hi guys

    Thanks Julie, for reminding me...it did all start coming back to me after I posted. Why the drawn out 'stuck' situation.
    Writing is great therapy. Even if it's just to get it out.
    Of course ,coming here gives us a new perspective too.
    The thing is, I could b wrong, but - you actually Care.
    You even care about Her.
    And Mikie cares about Her. The other Her.
    And you guys do empathise...
    Unfortunately, our bodies carry the brunt.
    Don't be hard on yourself. You're special and anyone who has you in their life is blessed for it.
    You just look at your Treasures....you continuously Give and invest into others...
    They are a reflection of your heart.
    And Mikie, all you do here is greatly appreciated. Investing in U.S. (Sorry can't fight auto correct all day).

    My brain is hitting too many walls to continue, but you get my point.
    I can see why Mikie says this is a family here.

    Now I'm going to suffer the rest of the day with
    'That's the way, aha aha, I like it...' Rattling away in my head.
    Thanks Rock.
    Can always count on you to put the 'smile on the dial'

    Anyway, melt down is approaching, so I hope I've made some sense here.

    All the best to everyone here.
    Sun, spring, Barry, Diane, rock, Julie, Mikie,Linda, Elaine, Granni-
    Gee ghats risky business trying to remember all names.
    Hope I didn't mess up.

    Take care
    catch yas later!
    Mikie and rockgor like this.
  16. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Good Morning, Dear Porchies,

    I am hoping I have another good day. Some pain last night and a bit of blood in my urine but, other than that, I'm doing much better. I do have some nausea this morning, though. I got all my laundry done, the bed changed, the trash cans taken over to the pool house bathrooms, and Ilona's condo downstairs inspected and damp rid canisters replaced. It feels soooo good to have a productive day. It really improves my mental outlook. Sir Vester loves it when I change the bed. He jumps up on it and 'helps' me put on and take off the bedding. Every morning now, he cries and wants to be picked up and held like a baby in my arms. He purrs and gives me love looks. OMG! I'm spoiling him rotten but I can't resist him.

    DD called yesterday afternoon to say they were all doing well since having Nigel put to sleep. The vet comes to the house. He is an older man who was waiting to retire after Nigel and another sweet dog were gone. He had a very special connection to these two dogs and didn't want to abandon them in their hour of need. The kids love him and Nigel adored him. I'm so thankful for this wonderful man in their lives. Evidently, DSIL is struggling with this. Nigel was really his dog. My ex has told DD that he is coming to visit by himself. He usually backs out at the last minute so she isn't holding her breath. They had a water problem and are having to have the entire kitchen redone. It will be a mess while he is there. They hope to be finished by Thanksgiving when I visit.

    It's slowly been cooling off for which I'm thankful. The high 80's are a lot better than the low 90's. I got my electric bill and it was $80, down about $10 from last month. Tropical Storm Matthew is in the Caribbean and headed west. It will make a turn to the north but it is uncertain when it will turn and whether it will impact FL. We still have another month of hurricane season ahead. By this time of year, we can see the light at the end of the sweltering tunnel when our best weather returns.

    Julie, you are doing such a wonderful job but I'm sure it is very stressful having to deal with everything. You will be glad in the end that you documented it all. I am glad you have such a good atty. who knows what is going on. I hate to sound sexist but men often seem to be able to compartmentalize in order to be able to function. They focus on the job and don't let anything stressful blend into the task at hand. Men's brains differ from women's in that the corpus collosum, which is a kind of bridge between the left and right hemispheres, is smaller. Women are better able to 'multitask.' We actually can't do two things at once but can jump back and forth rapidly from one half of the brain to the other. That is why it is often more difficult for us to shut out the emotions. We experience them all the time. Men can shut them out but shouldn't do it long term without addressing them or that, in itself, can cause stress and physical illness. Can you two do things together which help reduce stress? Have some fun and laugh if you can.

    Rock, glad you got some sleep. I will check on that book. Psychology has always interested me and my therapy at various times in my life was literally a life saver. I've worked in marketing, my degree is in marketing, so consumer behavior is fascinating to me. I'll check Amazon for that author and book. X-Rated, you say? I'm 72 and one of the things I miss is road trips. I made one last year but only to Orlando. I enjoyed driving by myself but the trip home on I-75 at 80 mph with DGS was definitely not something I'd like to repeat. I've always loved driving by myself but, at this age with a 14 year old car, I'm not sure it would be a good idea, especially with all the violence and road rage today.

    I love palindromes but not as much as puns. I've seen whole palindromic sentences. I wonder at the minds which can come up with them. Same with those who create crossword puzzles. My pea brain struggles to focus. This whole stone saga has actually been going on since July, more or less three months. The back pain started then; with the doc's wanting me to pass them; then the cat scan which showed one was too large to pass and was posing a danger to the kidney; then the procedure with the stent, which was left in for five weeks; and now, the final frags passing two weeks post stent removal. A saga indeed! I'm certainly getting in lots of practice at whining. Let us know how you like the book.

    Star, thank you for your kinds words. Yes, this is truly a family here. You are right; writing is very therapeutic. I saw on TV a man who is dying from ALS. He sat down and wrote a letter to his younger self, laying out what was ahead in his life. Of course, he wrote about the horrific condition but also wrote about his family and all the blessings in his life. I am thinking I might do the same. I can't compare ALS to what I have but I think it might be helpful to me to do this exercise. Oprah has always recommended keeping a gratitude journal and I did that for a long time. It helps to keep from focusing only on the negative. I can tell you focus on the positive with your family. Good for you! I hope you are recovering from the camping trip. Is it getting spring like there? Things are starting to cool down here in some parts of the country. CA has been warm as often happens in the fall. It is only slightly cooler here in FL but every drop in temp can be felt. Take care, dear one.

    I've been posting and editing to try to keep from losing my posts. My computer gets a blue screen and restarts due to some error or other. If it happens when I'm posting, I lose everything. I hate when that happens. I hope everydobby has a great day.

    Love, Mikie

    Update: Rock, I just downloaded the Michael Bennett Book to my Kindle. Now I see why you said it's R-Rated. The title itself is R-Rated. Certainly made it easier to identify. I liked what I read about the book and the reviews by readers. Now, I'll be reading this and Seven Eves at the same time. Yikes! I'll never get through either of them.
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2016
  17. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Hi Kids

    Just watched another NCIS program. NCIS is one of those cops-forensic evidence
    programs. Has been on the air since 2003. It is so popular they have off
    shoots. NCIS LA, NCIS NO (New Orleans) NCIS New York. Just discovered
    the New York branch today.

    Mikie, Bennett's book is R Rated? Usta was it wooda been X. It is one of the
    words that the Philos0pher George Carlin said (in 1972) could not be spoken
    on TV. But times have changed. I've heard at least half of them of TV lately.
    I read that Julie Andrews once said one of them at a rehearsal for some
    movie or TV show. The whole cast burst out laughing as did she.

    I think one can benefit from Bennett's book even if you don't read all of
    it. Each chapter is complete on its own. You might wanna start w/ the
    chapter for those of us who are disabled.

    Linda, how ya doin'? Your bones healing up without problems? Does the
    Doc still have you wearing that boot? Come back when you can.

    Barry, what's going on in the far North? Richard and Shorty and
    all okee dokee? Do you have enough energy to do stuff around the
    house? You guys split the cooking? Richard read any new books
    about the movies. I just put a couple on hold: The Columbia Studios
    Story and The Brothers Warner. There are so many books on the
    movies with similar titles it often turns out when I get them that
    I've already read them.

    Julie, you can assure your DH that although Mikie and I have been
    talking about opium Dens, we did not mean him.

    Well, Kids, maybe I'll go lie down again. No sleep thus far. Oh, I found
    a new author. Her name is Molly Gloss which is an anagram for
    So Lolls Gym. More good news; she has written several other books.

    OK, time ta go
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2016
  18. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Hi, Kids,

    Just stopping in before I go to the store here. It's been pouring rain so I've decided to go to Publix tomorrow. Sir Vestor and I will survive another day. A commuter train in Hoboken, NJ crashed into the terminal. Lots of injuries but no one killed and no life-threatening injuries so far. It must have been really scary for those people. It has knocked politics off the news.

    Oops, Rock. Yes, the title is X-Rated. I'm so tired today that I'm not thinking straight. I actually feel better but am exhausted. It's probably from overdoing it yesterday. I'm going to check out the book. I love it that the minute I click on a book I'm buying, it's on my Kindle in less than a minute. I often complain about service but this is amazing--Amazing Amazon. Their logo should be X-Rated. I'm even impressed with Comcast these days. They have spent mucho dinero to improve their customer service. Their equipment is vastly improved and is easy to use in managing recording and viewing. At this rate, I'll get spoiled.

    I hope all our Porchies are doing well, those here and those MIA. I hope everydobby can drop in even if just to let us know y'all are OK. We worry when we don't hear from time to time.

    Love, Mikie
  19. bct

    bct Active Member

    Popping in to show I am still alive.......I think!

    Star, your "holiday"seems to have been quite an adventure; I was white knuckling it when you described the flooded landscapes. I guess you are in for another major storm in your part of the world -- hope it doesn't impact you. By the way, I loved the eye picture of the koala ambling along!

    Well, the well has finally run dry. Oh well, we will wallow along as best we can with our holding tank -- not potable water -- until the rains come, the creeks and spring run. Supposed to rain this weekend. Chance is 100% according to the frequently wrong forecasts.

    Star, you mentioned that mum ate "plain food". Does that mean you eat strange things that she doesn't like? It must be difficult to cook two different meals at one time. Aaah, maybe not.

    Rock, Richard does most of the cooking now. I used to. So no more tripe de Albi for a while! Richard is still very depressed about Shorty's afflictions -- deafness and seizures, the latter thankfully being controlled by phenobarbital.

    Julie, I am glad you are feeling better. Domestic/family dramas can be quite overwhelming. Again, thinking of you and the floods in Iowa. Were your crops affected? And like Rock, I want to know what kind of beans are being grown. Is Rock right with soy?

    Nice to read all your posts.
    Love to All,

    Always remember, Time flies like an arrow, Fruit flies like a banana. :p
    Starlight74 and rockgor like this.
  20. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Well-Known Member

    Our internet has been off most of the day and I have been busy paying my fee at the courthouse and going shopping. Now I have to go get my drivers records sent to me which is good by the way other than this awful mess. That is another story. So I have to work on the computer and then go fix dinner.

    Will try and get back later.

    Love you all,
    Granni :)