Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Mikie, Jul 18, 2014.

  1. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Julie, I have to say I agree with Granni and Jam. Sis, and whomever she is hanging with, is never going to change. It is too stressful for you to constantly have her do this in your face; it only stresses you out further. I agree that, regardless of how shameful it looks to anyone else, paying someone to mow GPA's yard is the way to go. Those two lazy people will never do it so it's up to you to find a practical way to get it done without doing it yourself. You have too much on your plate as it is. We all know you mow his lawn for him out of love but you are also doing so many other things out of love for your family. Something's gotta give! That something may be your health. It's not too late to pare things down to only what is absolutely necessary. I'm sorry the kids are sick again. I hope they feel better. I also hope you feel better.

    I am reading a book on healthier backs and this guy seems to really know his stuff. He talks about stress and how it affects every aspect of our health, including digestion, back pain, muscles, etc. He talks about how people go to doctors who only put band aids on their problems instead of getting at the real problems. He understands that medical school doesn't prepare orthopedic docs to get at a patient's stressors or give them nutritional advice but those things affect our health. He covers not only the mechanics of back pain but all the other contributing factors. He mentions fibromyalgia quite a bit. I believe that we absolutely cannot be healthy unless we find a way to get rid of stressors or to deal with them in a healthy way. That sometimes means disassociating ourselves from family members and just dealing with the practical things. It isn't easy. I highly recommend Tai Chi, Yoga and/or meditation.

    Granni, I understand first things first. Sometimes, I have to do an unpleasant chore just to get at the next thing I need to do. Today, I paid bills or, at least, two of them. I've had about $1,000 more in new glasses and co-pays for docs and PT this last month. I have to call my IRA advisor to find out how much I have to take out before I turn 70 1/2. I hope it's not much because I'd rather not take anything out. I think it's an intrusion for the govt. to tell us when we HAVE to withdraw money from our own retirement accts. The age used to be 72 1/2, so they've moved it up. To make things worse, my local financial guy retired so I have to call someone at ING who is a perfect stranger. I hate dealing with this.

    Jam, if you read the first part of my post, you see that I agree with you. It sounds as though you've had to simplify your life and it seems to suit you well. I'm trying to do the same thing. It isn't easy. Guess I'm too attached to some of my things. I'll likely never play golf again, ski or ride my bike but I hate to sell them; they are too good to donate. I think a lot of the problem is emotional attachment. Since my hip accident, sciatica and, now, this torn hamstring muscle, the reality that I can no longer do things is hitting me. I had accepted growing older in looks but not in abilities. I guess I have more adjusting to do. So, now I'm through the denial stage, and I have no anger about it, it's time for acceptance. The silver lining will be more space that these things used to take up.

    Sunflower Girl, isn't it funny what a cat will turn into a plaything? I really had to lock the closets because some of them contain things which the cats could really wreak havoc with. The builder didn't leave enough of a flange in the laundry closet to hold the dryer vent accordion hose. I put the clamp on it but it comes off easily so I duct taped it in place. If the cats attacked that hose, it would leak tiny amts. of lint and could catch fire. By now, I can imagine what might attract them. In another closet, I have fertilizer and weed killer which would be poison if one of them licked the container. So, as I said, it's like baby proofing my house. Sylvester has a foot fetish. He has to sniff the feet of everyone who comes in. He also sits up like a little ground hog to look in the tub when I'm soaking. On top of everything else, I think I've mentioned that he tries to mount Tweety (both have been neutered). I call him affectionately, my little perv. Both are passed out right now, Tweety on top of the back of the loveseat and Sylvester in their little animal print cat bed. They switch off and on and look for new places to curl up. Funny little characters.

    I want to get a slat for my sliders with a pet door built in. That way, they could come and go and, at night, I could put the solid piece in so they couldn't come back in the condo. They cost about $150 at Lowe's but I hate to buy one if Julie decides to take them back. Nothing would make me happier than if her health would allow her to have them. I love them and would miss them but she loves them too. As much as I do love them, I just never really wanted pets at this stage in my life. I enjoy them every day. I let them in about 4:00 in the morning and the people downstairs said they can hear my sliders opening and shutting. I oiled the track and try to do it slowly and quietly but, because of the way our bldg. is built, we can all hear each other's sliders. Until it got so hot out, I was leaving just enough space for them to come in and go out. The A/C won't keep it cool in here unless the doors are shut. In fact, I close the blinds wherever the sun shines in. We only have single-pane windows so they aren't very NRG efficient.

    Yesterday, I did smudge our bldg. and the one next door. I had bought little packs of sage for smudging at a New Age store. Well, I lit it and it smudged for a bit but wouldn't keep smoking. I had to keep relighting it. It's hard to pray and walk all around the bldg., stopping every little bit to relight the sage. Think I may go back to using incense. In any case, I hope the smudging keeps us in the light of Spirit and keeps all neg. NRG away.

    Have a wonderful rest of the weekend, everydobby.

    Love, Mikie
  2. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Oops, more posts after I posted mine. This always happens when the posts run over to page 2.

    Springwater, I missed you in the process. I'm sorry. It's good to hear from you. I wish you could find a home more to your liking and your needs. Maybe there has been some neg. NRG in here because, in addition to dying batteries, I keep losing, or breaking, my earrings. They just disappear. I pray every day for protection from negativity but I do think smudging will help. I pray only to work in the light of Spirit when I use my pendulum but, perhaps it has been a doorway for neg. influences. I don't know. All the accidents in the last year, including my head injuries, my hip injury, the sciatica, and now, the torn hamstring muscle might just be accidents but there could be something dark at work. I do feel lighter since the smudging. Instead of the shaman feather I bought, I used a big one Mom sent to me. It's like it was just asking me to use it.

    My best to you and yours.

    Love, Mikie
  3. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Member

    Getting ready to go to church very soon but have been reading the posts. Hi to everyone!

    Julie - I can see where Grandpa most likely spoiled his little darling, Sis all her life and that is why she is the way she is. Most likely she will never change nor will her current BF, or whatever you call him. She probably feels she is entitled and can do whatever she wants and no one will question her. Don't know if she was sickly too as a child but sometimes that comes into play too. You may also have to be the one to find someone to mow. Talk about lazy !

    Spring Water - I would like to downsize myself as there is also to much for me to clean. However that costs money and we will have to get rid a lot of fairly big furniture. That will have to wait. Maybe we will be ready in a few years. More hopefully later. I need to start packing some later even if we leave o Tuesday.

    Need to run, love you ALL.
    Granni :)
  4. sunflowergirl

    sunflowergirl Active Member

    Spring: I know you've mentioned before that you live in a 3 story building. Part of your husband's business. Perhaps you could talk to your DH about a different place to live in. At my age (almost 70) I realize life is too short to put off situations, etc. Maybe he doesn't know that you would like a different home. Couldn't hurt to talk about it.

    Yes, the class was super! What a deal at $6.50 for an online LIVE class, where I can also paint along if I want to or ask questions. I'm learning so much from this artist. By the way, his name is Johannes Vloothies if you want to do a search to see his work. I'm incapable of going to a workshop for painting.....even with watching this I have to constantly get up and walk around.

    Mikie: I've never seen those slider door blocks with a cat door in them. Great idea for you since you're up on a second floor. We have disappearing sliding doors that roll into a side that gets hidden. The problem is it's just the screen stretched taut and my one cat learned right away she can just walk thru it so she's done a heck of a lot of damage to them. I had bought heavy wood baby gates when my grandkids were small since we have the pool right outside. I put up the baby gate with the door open and the screen stretched across and this bars them from going outdoors. We do what we have to do.

    Julie: God works in mysterious ways to accomplish something. My thinking is he allowed Den to fall off the roof with no injuries so you BOTH would have your eyes opened. You HAVE to tell yourself your immediate family comes first. I'm sorry to say this, but I believe Gpa knows everything that you do and what his DD does, and he still seems able to open his mouth and put his foot down. HIRE a local boy who needs work. Go to the Amish community for some help in locating the right person. And...........rid yourself of all the stress.

    I realized yesterday that the antidepressant pills my DH had been put on are really doing a # on his brain. I made him call the doc. yesterday who agreed, told him to drop it back to what he had been taking and then in another week he would start to wean him off them. Too many chemical in his system with overload. And I think he's decided he'll stop the chemo since it's not working anymore. I told him to try to get healthier and leave it up to God to do the healing. This whole stress is really doing a # on me too. I'm so thankful I can get outside and work around my garden....it needs so much TLC. And I'm thankful I can also get into my studio and push around the paint a bit.
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2014
  5. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Member

    Hi AWL finally got to sit down today after church. Did some washing, packing, etc. as I have a meeting to go to tomorrow. So not to much time to pack tomorrow morning anyway.

    Spring Water - You asked about constipation . Now I don't know if they have stuff at your grocery or drug stores or where you buy things to help you to hopefully feel better. I take some Benefiber which is a very fine white powder that you put in water or any drink or food you want. I put it in my tea in the morning. You can use it 1 - 3x a day I think depending on you or your friends problem. However, I would start very slowly and work up if needed .

    Magnesium is also very helpful. I think you or she can take up to about 500 mg 2x a day but then again work up on that too. If you have very loose stools, cut back. Of course, fruits and veggies and juices are good too and water. As you probably already know cheese ,rice and bananas are binding - If you cannot find Benefiber it also comes in the generic form made or bought by grocery chains. Here they have HEB, Kroger, and Equate (Wal Mart) brands and probably many others. These are the ones close to me. I have been dealing with chronic constipation since I was a little child and I still remember that menacing enema bag. Now they have those throwaways which are a lot neater and probably not so awful. I haven't had to take one of those.

    I also take Activa yogurt which has been helpful to me. I take it in the morning with breakfast. Oh, I also take a stool softener every now and then as needed. Yes, I have to work at it. Actually I take all the mag. mostly for hi b/p but now also for constipation.

    Hope everyone has had a nice weekend. Hope JULIE is feeling a little better and has calmed down some from the doc visit, feeling bad, and all that turmoil happening in the family. Yes, we all have to learn to let go and get rid of stuff that is causing us physical and or psychological pain/ problems. I also know I is not always easy.

    You are right JAM, sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and just do what you can do to eliminate the person or problem from your life. I know you will never completely be rid of sis as she is your SIL, JULIE. However, she (Julie) can see her as little as possible and no more lawn mowing over there. God only knows she has enough to keep her busy every day !!

    Sun - Hope your DH after he gets off or cuts back on the AD pills, it will help his brain function . The chemo. I am sure does enough bad stuff to his body. Praying to God for both DH and yourself. There is to much going on lately with people I know on and off line with cancer and other awful things.

    Hi to MIKIE, ROCK, SUN, and whoever else I have missed. To busy today !!

    Love to you awl,
    Granni :)
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2014
  6. sunflowergirl

    sunflowergirl Active Member

    Jam: I've been clothes cleaning for a couple of years. I just keep culling out things I haven't worn or have no need for. When my mom moved from her mobil home.....OMG......the clothes and STUFF were unbelievable stuffed in there. I worked one month in the summer, tossing things from her linen closets and under the kitchen counters........jelly jars, mayo jars, at least 200 rubberbands, towels with holes. Things that she just couldn't get rid of because she had gone thru the depression. At that time I said I would NEVER put my kids thru that so that's why I sell my collectibles on ETSY. I still have so many boxes I need to put up for sale though. But as to the clothes and personal items, I've cleaned those out.

    I've spent the day at the clinic and then on to the hospital. My DH now shows he has an obstruction so after he spends a night in the hospital on IVs for dehydration (I can't tell you the times I told him to DRINK water) he'll have an upper GI tomorrow so they can learn what's causing this. I was told it was either a kinked bowel (don't know how that's fixed) scar tissue from the surgery, or another mass on the colon. I don't think it's a mass otherwise I think his CEA count would have dramatically gone up.

    I'm tired and hungry so I'll post tomorrow the results.
  7. lydia1

    lydia1 Well-Known Member

    Hi everyone! I see we've reached 30 posts, so I will go start a new porch volume...don't post any more on here...look for #729