Prayer Thread for 9/17

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by soulight, Sep 11, 2009.

  1. soulight

    soulight New Member



    You can post prayer requests here for Thursday Prayer Night, a tradition when those of us who can, all pray together in our own homes for the requests.

    In the United States, we start at 11 PM Eastern Time, 10 PM Central, 9 PM Mountain, and 8 PM Pacific.

    (I can't pray at the set time, I pray as the requests come in.)

    A new thread will be posted every Friday.( unless Holly posts it and then who knows ? ; O[This Message was Edited on 09/11/2009]


    ____________________________


    9/13/09
    For some reason , I haven't been able to get back on to the board until today . The LOGIN wouldn't except my usual password so I had to get a new one. Anyway , here is the thread for Thursday ! [This Message was Edited on 09/13/2009]
    [This Message was Edited on 09/13/2009]
  2. soulight

    soulight New Member

    I actually have a request for Wednesday the 16th. I will be seeing yet another doctor for my female problems. This time a gynecological oncologist. I don't have cancer , but my "insides" are complicated enough to need the expertise of a gyn/onc .

    I hope this one is the end of the journey . I am truly getting weary . Pain level from flare is up and now some of my other chronic conditions are trying to flare up too ( sugars very hard to control with the hormone supplements , but do-able.)

    So , back to a complete hysterectomy and bilateral oopherectomy . God works in mysterious ways, but I know that He holds my life in His hands.


    In His Grace and Love ,
    Holly

    PS
    A praise :
    About 30 people went up and excepted the Lord / got baptized spontaneously at church today ! What a rush ! ! !


    _______________________________________

    I just read about the Yale student , whose body has been found in a wall in the building she was last seen in . On the day that was supposed to be her wedding day . Please pray for her fiance and family. This is so tragic and brings me to tears. This world is not my home . I'm just passing through.. . If Heaven weren't my home ,Oh Lord , what would I do ? God please Bless and watch over this precious grieving family.[This Message was Edited on 09/13/2009]
  3. windblade

    windblade Active Member


    Have been praying for you dear, and will especially keep you in prayer now, until the 16th. I read what you wrote on Jole's thread too. I was wondering if your church was going to have the classes/counseling for trauma or abuse survivors.

    I thought you had mentioned that it might start in the Fall.

    Adding my prayers for all of us - the little girls that suffered so much, and our ability to become stronger in comforting, soothing, and telling them the truth! Getting rid of any false guilt or a child's confusion.

    When I first started practicing this 18 years ago - I had such a negative attitude. Now, I gather from the world all the loving role models, and ways to comfort that inner child of mine.

    Since you can't go to a therapist now, I could recommend some books that you could get used from Amazon or from your library.

    But it sounds like you've already started. Well done!

    I think Holly, you should be especially careful, and concentrate on comforting and working on your healing now. Just for now, with all these flashbacks, and the medical needs which are triggering them, you need to focus on you. Since the prayers for PTSD for others are scary, and might trigger you right now, it's best, and safer to avoid all triggers!

    You could right out dialogs to your young, frightened self, and answer from your adult, loving self - who knows the truth. But you always want to go slowly. You can imagine a safe place to put your scared inner child - that's one of my favorite and soothing visualizations. A safe place to shelter and calm those precious inner children.

    You have so much compassion, and empathy and love for others. You have all that to give to your self!!!

    Holly, also, do you have any meds. for anxiety? I think so, but my memory is foggy.

    There are a lot of resources, Thank God.

    Lord, I lift up to you Holly, and all that she is dealing with. Thank you Lord that you are the perfect parent! Guide Holly, please, and pour out your love on her. Especially You love that poor child-self who needs such special care now! Thank you Lord Jesus for your tender, protective love, help Holly to experience even more of You. I ask this in Your Holy, Precious Name. Amen.

    Love, Judy
  4. jole

    jole Member

    Sweetie, you have been there for me so many times, and I always feel so helpless to make things better for you. I do understand the emotional pain, and even drew comfort and ideas from what Judy said to you! Such wisdom!!

    You have such a loving, giving heart...always willing to reach out to others. I was pondering on this....and isn't it a miracle in itself that we can still love at all? Only through Jesus, could we who have suffered so much at the hands of others, still care! He has given us His all, and will see us through all, and will love us to eternity and beyond! He alone knows our innermost secrets, and cries with us when we hurt.

    And when He cannot show Himself to us, He sends His angels.....

    I wish you the very best, and will be praying for you, Holly! I hope you can feel the loving arms of our savior comforting you throughout the days ahead, just as your words have in the past comforted me!

    "There shall no evil befall thee, neither shall any plague come nigh thy dwelling. For he shall give his angels charge over thee to keep thee in all ways" Ps 91:10-11 ............................Love you! Jole
    [This Message was Edited on 09/14/2009]
  5. Doznclan3

    Doznclan3 New Member

    It's interesting that you suggested she write dialogs. I just wrote a letter to my mother about a month ago. She passed three years ago. I had some questions for her, because of my terrible past. I couldn't believe how the words just poured out on the pages.. I wasn't even sure what I had written, but I decided to put the letter away for a while, until I felt up to reading it. I read it about a week ago. Quite interesting how I felt while I wrote, and as I read it. I was letting go of so much while writing. Then, as I read, I actually found some answers to my own questions, without her here. It may sound strange, but I could see the past in a different way, actually remembering things better. I knew that she was in a hard place back then, but when I read it, I realized just how hard. I wasn't making exsuses for her and what happened to me back when I was a child..I just understood better how it could have happened. She was actually doing the best she could at that time.
    Try writing Holly, hope it works for you too.
    Prayers again for you Holly..love, Cynthia
  6. windblade

    windblade Active Member

    CYNTHIA,
    How wonderful that you did that. I remember you mentioning writing a letter to your mother months ago. I think there are so many layers to our perceptions. As my therapist says "The past is fluid".
    Meaning as we grow and change we see different things. And isn't it amazing how writing can bring so many insights?

    I keep an ongoing journal of my searches for the truth in my past . Since I am the only one in my family who has done this, (come out of denial) it is so hard! I record dreams, feelings, flashbacks, insights.

    One thing I'm trying to work through is my relationship with my father. It is so ultra - confusing. I've had 2 therapists tell me that his abuse is worse to deal with than my mothers, because he completely gave up any responsibility when my mother was so dangerous. So, I've had to struggle so hard with seeing this, and admitting it. It's been a horror!

    There is so much more to say, but I should start a different thread for that. It's so complex.

    Cynthia, I was so happy to see that you've returned! You've always brought such a caring, warm heart to us here!


    HOLLY - I think as you're struggling out of denial, and bravely facing your truth; I wanted to make sure that you knew that what you survived - the sexual abuse, was 100% wrong - evil!
    That is a reality that will not change!

    Praying hard for you, dear Holly. I believe that our Lord Jesus will find many ways to bring healing to you. He is faithful and wise beyond imagining. I'm praying for just what you need now - today - this week. He is the balm of Gilead, and near to the brokenhearted. Holding you in his arms, as the shepherd holds the lamb close to his heart.

    We are all here to be channels of his grace. I always think of the image of dolphins in their pod, they encircle, and lift up the head of the sick one; supporting it, so it can breathe.

    You are not alone - we all have had suffering childhood experiences, and know the pain, fear and confusion that takes hold.

    Sending love and prayers to you, dear Holly.
    Judy
  7. Doznclan3

    Doznclan3 New Member

    Just a quick reply..
    I love that.."The past is fluid" So true!
    And, I also keep a journal...for years now. I write all sorts of things in my journals, but also keep up with what is happening in family. :)
    Going to bed, finally!
    Cynthia
  8. Beadlady

    Beadlady Member

    we all seem to have so much going on.

    Please send prayers for me too--husb having surgery on Friday for his knee, I'm nervous about driving in a big unknown city.

    thank you!!
  9. windblade

    windblade Active Member


    Lifting up prayers for your husband's surgery on Friday; and for God's help for you to be able to drive in the city.

    Lord, please care for Beadlady on Friday - bring your supernatural help to keep her calm and focused. Bring your strength into her weakness, Lord. Bless her greatly - she is your most precious child. In Jesus' Holy Name, Amen.

    Bead - didn't you ask for prayer also recently for finances? Hours cut back or salary reduced? I had a glitch where I couldn't access the Prayer Request Thread. So frustrating - but it's fixed now. I prayed for you, but couldn't respond. Will keep praying.

    Love, Judy
  10. windblade

    windblade Active Member


    Lord, I lift up Shirl to you, with her 2 year situational depression. Lord, that just causes such a groan in my spirit, knowing how on-the-edge horrible that is. Lord, thank you that Shirl has made it through all this time. And Lord, please help her NOW - you know all the specifics. I thank you for the greatness of your love for Shirl. For your faithful character, Lord. You promised to work good in this situation - in her life. And I know you will keep that promise! I ask all this in Your Precious Holy Name, Jesus.

    I know how terribly, terribly hard it is to live with ongoing depression. Lifting up everyone here who suffers - including Mama R, who hasn't been able to be with us in a while.

    Lord, thank you for hearing our prayers!
  11. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    Thank the Lord, and you for your prayers. It is very kind of you to pray for me. My post is gone, but you seemed to have seen it before it disappeared!

    God bless you mightly for your concern, and you all here are always in my prayers.


    In His Name,

    Shalom, Shirl
  12. soulight

    soulight New Member

    My appointment went well with the gyn/oncologist. My regular gynecologist apparently had already called him and talked to him about me on the phone for over an hour.As a result , he didn't do any exam ( except for feeling my tummy with all my clothes on ) and said that he could tell just from what I wrote that he could decide what to do . No trauma at all ! Thank you Lord and thank you ladies for all the wonderful thoughts and prayers

    The doctor that I saw has be a gyn/onc for 3o years and could feel a lot of the mesh and structures and lumps and fibroids through my tummy. Result ? Complete radical hysterectomy in November.* UPDATE : Just found out that pre-op is November 5 with surgery November 9 . My gynecologist will be assisting ( Thank you Lord !) Uterus , ovaries and fallopian tubes. "We will cut down the zipper from your c-section" He also said that he would have recommended the TAH/BSO even without my bleeding as my family history of related cancers and my hormone problems would strongly lean toward future cancer for me.

    Although this is not what I thought the outcome would be after the visit to the major hospital last month , it is what is within His Will as I feel peace about it. Plus I feel relief to finally have a definite answer after having bled since April 15th ( I still am ) .The surgery will be sometime between Nov. 3 and Nov. 10 as the doctors have to coordinate their schedules( my regular gyn. requested to be there . Thank you Lord !)

    Judy , I know that you are right about being careful about praying for others with PTSD. I think sometimes it is scary to pray and nurture myself because those memories might come back too fast and I wouldn't know what to do . This is silly of course, because the Lord is in charge of all and He would not give me more than I can handle.

    Jole and Cynthia , writing in a journal and having a dialog with my inner little girls are great ideas. I have written journals all my life but for some reason , I have not approached this part of my life. Again , too scary . And, again , the Lord would not give me more that I can handle. He has talked to me many many times in my writing.

    Beadlady - My prayers are with your husband for his knee surgery and with you for your driving in a bigger city . You can do it ! I moved at one time to a huge city from a small country town. I just remembered to stay to the right (slow lane) and block out any honking or rude people. They are just being selfish and inpatient.

    For Shirl - I deeply know depression. I pray that God lifts you out of that deep dark pit. Reach up and He will take your hand. He loves you even when you cannot feel it.

    Mama B. ? I don't remember this person , but I pray that she is OK.

    Thank you for all your support and prayers and advice. I feel the love and the caring ! God is so Good ! Oh , and please keep it all coming , OK ? You are all such blessings that I can't even find the right words to describe how much you mean to me.

    Love and Grace in His name,
    Holly
    [This Message was Edited on 09/17/2009]
  13. jole

    jole Member

    Yes! He is marvelous! I am so happy to hear things went well for you! Prayers are answered, as I well know. It's the most amazing proof of our Father, isn't it. For if He did not exist, we could all pray until we were blue in the face to no avail....but look what happens!

    I will continue to keep you in my prayers, and know He will keep you safe in His hands throughout the surgery. This may not have been what you expected, but it really sounds like the right decision to me....gets rid of the problem and future concerns all at once. Just be sure to get on a hormone of some sort, okay? Oh, won't it feel good to have it all behind you and actually (hopefully) have a little energy again?? Wishing you all the best, Holly, and knowing God will be there for you each step of the way.............Jole
  14. soulight

    soulight New Member

    You have th gift of saying just the right thing at the right time. Thank you so much for the wonderful words of encouragement. In fact , everybody has had wonderful things to say. I didn't mean to write so much about myself on this prayerthread , but bless you all for responding. I am copying and pasting this. BTW , I will copy and paste each prayer thread into microsoft word if anyone would like to reference a past thread.

    God Bless you Jole. Isn't so wonderful that God knows where to put us and to tell us just the right words to say for our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ ? Thank you for being a willing vessel for Him. Love , Holly

    And thank you all for the precious words that have made me feel loved and cared for.

    Love, Holly
  15. soulight

    soulight New Member

    Thank you for lifting me up to the Lord. Thank you for your ideas about doing some work in a journal and dialogs too. I keep thinking about the journal , which I think is do-able for me , but the dialog idea really frightens me. What if I don't know what to say to those little 4 and 12 year old girls ? Will I be able to comfort them ?

    I hear of horrible things happening to children and I have to change the channel . I know that these things are not from God, but still I hate this fallen world and I get too anxious and terribly sad when I hear about children and animals being abused. They are so innocent and these monsters are in this world spreading evil.

    I can think of what I would do if I caught one of them with a child , but when it comes to the child in me , I start getting scared as that child and my adult self can hardly come out to help. I almost get frozen in that time and want someone to rescue me and I want it to be someone who should have rescued me then ! Why weren't they there ?

    As you see , I need a lot of work with a therapist and with prayer and reading appropriate materials. Please continue to pray and thank you sot much for being here for me.

    I do take xanax and the doctor has upped my dose until I can start therapy. The fall class will have to be canceled until January because some crucial steps in the process will be during and after my surgery.My social worker is trying to help me get a better insurance so that I can receive therapy.

    The surgery is going to be either gratis from the hospital , paid for by my church family , or reviewed by the Medicaid review team after the surgery . Why after ? Probably because I have to have the surgery either way . It is not elective. God knows how to find the funds though. He is in charge of all the world's riches after all.

    There I go , filling up the prayer thread again. Thank you so much for being here for me Judy ! Oh , I will not be praying about PTSD for others even though I want to so badly . God wants me to love me too.

    Love,
    Holly
  16. soulight

    soulight New Member

    Your idea about writing letters would be a good project for me, but I am too frightened at the moment. It is like I said to Judy about the little girl and the adult parts of me and not knowing who will write the letter and who will comfort the little girl. No , I am not a split personality, but the little girl is definitely in a different world and time and space in my mind. And she is very scared.I don't like to feel those feelings and I will have to go very very slowly with writing , journal sessions and other modes of letting these times come out. Very slowly.

    I do know without any doubt , that God will be here with me , but as I realize more and more of what happened those 2 different times , I also realize that I need someone safe to go back there with me.

    Thank you for praying and I will be praying that all goes well with you too.

    Holly