prayers needed for my teenager and myself

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by griswoldgirl, May 27, 2002.

  1. griswoldgirl

    griswoldgirl New Member

    Sandra is making some bad choices as far as friends and experimenting with alcohol and cigarettes. At least she has felt comfortable to tell me about it and choked on the cigs and will not do that again-but yesterday she stole a beer out of the fridge and shared with her friends when I was at work yesterday and tried to lie and tell me it fell out of fridge-I think she thinks I feel off the turnup truck yesterday.

    Pray that she will make better choices in her frindships and in respecting our house rules and not head down a path of destruction.

    thanks

    cathy
  2. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    and Sandra, Cathy. I raised three, and they all survived the 'terrible' teens(I wonder if I did though)!

    People always say the 'terrible two's, but to me I was in total control of them when they were 'two', but the teen years are the worst!

    You are right with choosing friends, but who can convince most teenagers that character counts when it comes to their friends?

    You have a great start, Sandra is open with you, and you can talk with her. You have half the battle won!

    Try being friends with her friends (not on their level, but 'open' to them), you would be surprised that some of what you think are the bad kids, are simply just 'kids' looking for attention, recogniziation and someone to look up too, if you have the time and patience, be that 'Mom' that all the kids wish they had for a 'Mom'.

    I did that, and did it honestly, as I like teens, and young people and can relate to them. I can still remember when I was their age (I have a long memory!), and wanted to try everything and anything I could get away with. I was not raised in a Christian home, my family were good people, but not church going Christians.

    Of course I didn't do it all, but I sure gave it my best shot. The thoughts were there, as is the kids today.

    My kids tried the cigarettes, liquor, and drugs. Thankfully they survived it all. No, I did not have liquor or drugs in the house ever. But thats kids.

    I will keep you both in my prayers, and the Lord will lead her in the way He wants her to go.

    By the way, they all think, at that age, that we 'fell off a turnip truck'!

    God bless,

    Shalom, Shirl








    [This Message was Edited on 05/28/2002]
  3. Harmony

    Harmony New Member

    Hi Cathy,
    I can't believe I just went to edit what I wrote you this morning (and it was long)and I deleted instead.
    I want you to know I am praying for Sandra and you and your husband. I too know how hard it is to raise teenagers, but with God's help, we can make it. Hang in there! My husband just came home and I have to go now.

    Hugs, Harmony

  4. toni.m

    toni.m New Member

    wondering how you and your family are faring.
    i think Shirl has made a great point- at least she is talking to you.
    i cannot speak from experience, my son is 6, but alot of what i read here seems to hold true to myself, when i was her age and kind of ' lost'.
    i was lucky, as i had a great mom who loved to sit down after school and talk to me, i would give anything to have those great talks again.

    i just wanted to let you know that i am keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers, and please don't forget we are here for you.
    i am going through some very tough family stuff right now, and there are many time i wonder how i will make it through another trip to the hspital, to see my mother in law looking the same as my own mother did just before she passed away- but than i stop and think of the great people we have here, and their kind words and prayers, and i find the strength to carry on through this awlfull time.
    i did not mean to ramble on, i just wanted to try and make a point here, please do not hasitate to lean on us, we can carry the burden togather.

    take care, toni
    [This Message was Edited on 05/28/2002]
  5. Esoteric

    Esoteric New Member

    I hope that this is just an isolated incident for Sandra, one where she was showing off to her friends.

    I have two teens and I don't always like the choices they make, but it is important to keep the lines of communication open. Perhaps approach her when she is alone and in a loving manner, ask her to tell you what really happened. If done later and in a very non- confrontaional manner, I have found that to be helpful in having my children open up more with me.

    I do pray for you and Sandra. Is Sandra quite young? I had some problems with my daughter when she was in her younger teens. Hang in there mom!

    Esoteric

  6. griswoldgirl

    griswoldgirl New Member

    The only reason it was in the fridge was it was left over from the memorial day weekend party we went to, usually I keep my beer at my neighbor's house do to the fact that my hubby is a recovering alcoholic and I do it out of respect. We got home late on sunday night and just emptied cooler into the fridge. I do not drink much and really only on special occasions due to meds I take. Lesson learned-they will not find it at my house any more.

    we have talked and everything will be okay-kids will be kids and I did the same thing when I was young-just hard to see yourself in your child-it is scary.

    thanks for all your prayers and support

    cathy
  7. MarcRaim

    MarcRaim New Member

    Cathy,

    Sorry to hear your're having more problems with your daughter. I've been very lucky with my two boys---as far as I know they have never smoked, used alcohol, or took drugs.

    If I remember, your daughter has FMS. Maybe she feels so angry at having a chronic illness at such an early age she figures that smoking and drinking can't hurt her anymore.

    What I was thinking was that if you can emphasize to her that because she has FMS it is of the utmost importance for her to treat her body like a temple in order to maximize her future happiness in life as well as her ability to function in the least possible pain, she might respond better than if you take a more heavy-handed approach. I think that if you can balance her need to "fit in" with the reality that she has to take special care of herself in order to be as healthy and functional as possible, she might respond positively.

    GOOD LUCK!!!

    Marc