Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by shari1677, Oct 7, 2009.

  1. shari1677

    shari1677 New Member

    I finally ventured out of my home today. I dont go out much, maybe once every 2 or 3 weeks for groceries or a doc appt. I try to combine errands as much as possible, or have family or friends pick things up for me while they are out.

    Anyway, it occurred to me while I was out - I feel like I've put MYSELF in prison. I dont go out. I stay in my PJs. I sleep alot. I watch TV ALOT.

    I stood there and made a pact to myself- to try to get out more. I dont think it is healthy for me to stay home for 2 weeks in a row, without seeing other human beings.

    Its like you forget there is a world going on outside, living and breathing, going on without you. Its kinda sad.

    A self-inflicted prison.
  2. mafusula

    mafusula New Member

    Hi Shari, I can relate with your could be talking about me!!!Take care!
  3. misskoji

    misskoji Member

    I too can relate in a big way. I'm hardly ever in 'real' clothes and the laptop and tv are my life lately.

    I have promised myself this too, but have overdone it time and again.

    Just do what you can, when you can and enjoy all you can when you can.

  4. pacotaco

    pacotaco New Member

    I can say the very same thing Shari!! all of us have the same story,I know that my days are the same as yours an as it just so happens,I had a Dr.s appt.tuesday,then found the energy to buy groceries (my husband with me),and it felt so good,an I felt as if I had just released from a tomb!My goodnes,I was amazed on how I felt! No one forces me to stay in my room,in my bed,in my house clothes,but then again,I necer know when I am going to have a good day so I can do something so I stay in the ,but I tell him that I would rather feel happy with my self about same mode each day. we cant always help it. But I do feel happy when I do get out an I so taked advatage an totally enjoy it! My hubby gets upset n wants me to go home n rest because he hates when the pain hits me so badfrom walking becaus of my spinal trouble,but i say that i am happy that even though that I will suffer later,atleast i am in pain from doing something rather than in pain from doing nothing!.but anyweay,Shari,when you can't get out,dont feel bad,if you cant,you cant,but when you do,ENJOY IT PAINPAL!!!
  5. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    There are many of us can relate to you here. Yes, it is a self imposed prison sometimes.

    Like someone else said, when you feel well enough, then by all means go out! anywhere, even just a drive will help you feel better sometimes.

    You are right, its not healthy to just stay home, believe me I know. I do this all the time. I never know how I am going to feel the next day, so its very hard to make plans for anything, or with anyone, most people do not understand how we feel anyway.

    Sooo keep an outfit for dressing handy, and when you feel good, its ready and you can just put your street clothes on and go!

    Sometimes I do not see another human for weeks, yes, I know that is very unhealthy. But its easier to just give up and go with the pain rather than put up a fight and go anyway.

    Most of the time if it was not for my big dog, I would have no one to talk too. She is my best buddy, and constant companion. She even knows when I am in a lot of pain, or feel really bad.

    YOu take the bull by the horns, and get yourself out as much as possible!

    Shalom, Shirl
  6. TeaBisqit

    TeaBisqit Member

    I rarely get to go out anymore, but it's not by my choice. I'm only well enough to go out to the store about twice a month. Maybe one occasional errand in between or a doctor's appointment. And once in a while, I have a friend that will take me out about once a month to a fast food place. But everytime I go out, I pay in spades with severe flareups. It's never, ever worth it to me.

    I would love to be out having a life, but I can't. I haven't even been able to get my mail in days. Yesterday I was too lightheaded and right now, I'm flaring up with pain and fatigue. I'm not even well enough to volunteer anywhere because I'm never okay on a daily basis. And on a day where I'm not as sick, I have to use that day to do the foodshopping or whatever errand.

    In my case, this is not self imposed. I'm simply too sick to do anything other the very basics and I can barely even do that most of the time.
  7. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    You and I have been on this board a long time now. Seems we are very close to the same way of living. Yes, my mailbox is about 300ft from the house, and there are times I can't get up that driveway to get it. I truly know how you feel. When I do go, I take the phone with me.

    When I do get out, I also pay for days afterwards, or if I do just a little too much around the house, I am in bed for days afterwards.

    I also just manage to get the basics done in the house, had to quit the gardening completely, which is ashame, as I love to grow things.

    You are so right, this illness is a prison in itself.

    There are so many things I need to do here, but I can't do them. They are things others simply can't do for you, like clean out files, etc.

    I am lucky I get the bills payed, keep myself up, and do only what needs to be done. It is horrible, especially for someone who never stopped doing things, and was always on the go. Now I have two speeds, slow and stop :)

    I had this house so in order, now its anything but, I rarely go upstairs here anymore, the stairs wear me out! If anyone asked me to do something, I almost go into a panic. Before I was always helping others, now I can't help myself with the simpless things.

    I need to clean out my closets, but if I fill up the boxes then they have to stay put till someone comes to take them off, I can't lift them.

    Grocery shopping has gotten to be out of the question, unless someone else pushes the cart, and carrys the bags, then there is the problem of putting the food away. Can't do either, my daughter is doing the shopping for me, and I just stay home, easier that way for me.

    Am afraid of driving anymore (the car just sits in the yard), worried that I will feel really bad and hurt some innocent people, plus if I did go to the store I could only buy what I could carry.

    Yes, I would like my 'life back too', but it sure does not look good these days........

    You are right its not selfimposed, its the illnesses.

    I used to have as many as six dogs at a time, I was always one for picking up strays and giving them homes, I love animals. Well all but one just lived their long lives out, and I am down to two now. I do not pick up anymore, I could not take care of them like I did before. I try to find homes for the ones I run into.

    I just have one old little girl I found in a supermarket thats 10lbs, and is about 9 years old now, and I bought a large American Bulldog 110lbs for protection as well as a companion. She is 6 years old . She is my best buddy and keeps me company, and won't let anyone come near me, and knows when I am not well. She won't leave the bed if I am sick. My grandson gives her baths for me, way too much for me to handle for that :).. She is a good girl and understands my every mood.

    She is never two feet away from me, right now she has her big self under my desk :), if I go back to bed, she is right on the side of me. I bought her to replace my Pit Bull who lived 16 years, and my White Boxer who lived 14 years. I almost grieved to death myself when I lost those two dogs. I truly miss them like they were my children....

    I so pray we all get better, at least enough to do somethings without having to pay so dearly for just a day out now and then.

    You take care of yourself, its no help, but you are not alone!

    Shalom, Shirl

  8. FibroFay

    FibroFay New Member

    I don't feel like it's my choice to be isolated. I'm in the same boat as the rest of you. My body just won't allow me to go out into the world very much. It's been this way for years and I've gotten sort of used to being alone.

    I find lately that I sort of fear people. I think I've lost my ability to be social and I'm very nervous and fearful when I do venture out. It's very uncomfortable.

    Can anyone relate to this fear?

  9. shelby11

    shelby11 New Member

    Hi, I'm Meme I did the same thing, we had moved as I was going through this and it was to me in no where land. I wouldn't go out except for mail and No phone either. I had gained 52 lbs. after 7 foot surgeries and cortisone predisone. I was ashamed also. I was going to pain management and I had to see a psycologists to help deal with pain. Long story short. He said go outside and plant a flower. Yea right i said. I had been a hairdresser since i was 16 and I didn't do yard. But, I did and 15 yrs later at my home, you should see my yard, almost 2 acres and I have turned it into a beautiful yard, with the help of my husband, it worked I shopped for gardening items and went to town, now I stay in no more. Try it/ lol meme