There have been some pretty hopeless-feeling sufferers on the board and I was just thinking back over the years and remembering some of the good stuff. I know there are some that get well and overcome this thing completely. There are some that have months and months of recovery and then are hit hard again. But for me, I believe i have been in some 'mini remission' moments in the past years and that gives me hope that maybe tomorrow or next week or next month will be better....maybe not perfect or cured, but better. Just wanted to share some of my "good stuff". First, I believe that I have been living with this disease for 25 years, even though dx for only 8. I remember being told in my 20's that I had depression, but those several bouts of "depression" seems a lot like I feel now and never wnt completely away, only it is now compounded greatly. I remember having to leave stores to go to the car and rest. I remember the pain and the brain fog. Headaches. Ringing in ears. and all the rest. I believed in my dx of depression at the time becasue that's what they gave me. And I got better...and then worse. Better...and then worse. Inbetween, I have had the chance to: have children, go back to school, help build a home, remarry, work, help raise my kids, work in my garden, do home projects, read and read and read, go on a few trips, learn new cooking skills, go camping, go fishing, watch my kids play sports...... The past 8 years with this disease has been tough. Brutal. Sometimes hopeless. Most of my last years I have spent in bed, on the couch, and not able to do more than tiny little interrupted chores at home. But sometimes you get a little mini remission and during those times (I have looked back last night and today and realized that) I have been able to: Go on 3 vacations with friends or family. Help raise my children. Work in my yard or garden. Watch my kids at their sports. Go camping. Go fishing. read and read and read. Have more time to snuggle with my kids. Have tea parties in bed with my girls. Learn new cooking skills that are revised sometimes. Rake a few leaves. Plant some bulbs. Get the mail. Drive a little. Go to a Halloween party. Get to some of my family holiday get-togethers. Walk almost a half block. Shop for special gifts. Walk in the woods. Have picnics. Spend time watching tv and holding my husbands hand more. Spend a week at a cabin with my family. Get through my Dad's funeral and help with meaningful parts of this. Go to a few movies. Watch some of my kids graduate and be able to help some with festivities. Try to sell products at home when i could.Put full make up on. Play cards or board games with family. Slumber party with my sisters. Slow dance with my little ones.Go see my new grandkids when they were born. Pet and cuddle our dog.WAtch my son's first touchdown. Hug a lot more.Make decorated cakes. Smile and laugh. Long phone calls to old friends I dont see often. And many more. The important thing is that I have still been able to experience some GREAT things in the past 8 years. Many of them had to be improvised to accomodate my illness. But they happened!!! If only an hour or half day "mini remission" or a week or 2 that made me able to accomplish something important or be able to visit someone, or vacation somewhere. That to me is Hope. Life looks bad for us for so much of the time...but we do have our little moments and chances to do some things that make us happy or productive. Even LITTLE things count! What proud, happy, or productive things have you done during your "mini remissions".