RESENTMENT!

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by desperation, May 15, 2003.

  1. desperation

    desperation New Member

    At times I can deal with this illness but all the time I feel resentful about how my life has been robbed by this DD.
    I cringe when people at work say how tired or ill they feel because I wonder how they would cope with CF. I want to yell ' shut up you have no idea!'
    I am forever trying to prove how ill I feel. Other people get more understanding when they have a poxy cold!I'm bitter and I don't want to be. I always thought I'd be more understanding to those who feel unwell but apart from CFS sufferers I think 'stop your moaning'.
    I'm most definitely not talking about seriously ill people but those who have 'bad' days ie: colds, late nights, hangoverss etc.
    Anyway, I've finished ranting. I'm not a heartless women just so bitter. WHY?
    Lots of love to you all
    lu x
  2. fibrorebel

    fibrorebel New Member

    I really don't believe that any of us are bitter...just utterly frustrated. To live with a chronic illness we go through so....many stages and back through many stages! I can only speak for myself, but when I begin that cycle of resentment, I know it is time for me to research some topic to do w/ my illness, as knowledge is power, and as I feel more powerful I tend to feel more powerful over my health. Hence I am not so resentful and I feel less hopeless as well. As for others, as human beings we tend to not understand things we haven't had to contend with. I try to take myself back to before Fibro and look at the way I viewed chronic illness, I then tend to have more patience with others around me. Much peace to you, hang in there!
    love, Rebel
  3. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Anger is a natural part of the grieving process at all we are losing or have lost. I always recommend grief counseling to help move beyond the anger to acceptance where we can turn our energies toward healing. Anger takes way too much energy and is self-defeating.

    Love, Mikie
  4. kerrymygirl

    kerrymygirl New Member

    I feel if a person harbors anger it can harm you. Then again if you get angry at the illness, truly angry it can help. People think anger is bad, but it is a true emotion and has shown to give off, like endorphins, healing properties. When my mom got cancer she was fighting mad, not normally an angry person. She was so angry because she was such a proud woman,sort of prima dona type, they removed her breast yrs. ago. I truly believe her anger saved her. She yelled at the doc right into surgery. The doc gave her 3 mo. to live said cancer was fast and had feelers everywhere. She is sitll around 40 yrs. later and 1 of the only people left who started( Reach for Recovery). She used the same thing again with her recent heart problems& surgery. It is hard to live with her then but, I think the anger thing can work. People I know who calmly accepted their fate,they are now dead. My mom now at 82 doe`s 10 times more than I can now.
  5. bakron

    bakron New Member

    I find myself feeling the same feelings towards those who complain with minor complaints when I am many times dragging myself to work and just trying to "get through the day." I don't think that “resentment” is necessarily an “anger” in the sense that you may mean it or how I feel. I think that the feeling is one of “irritation” when people seem to be making excuses get off work, or when they “prep” others to more or less warn the others that they may be requesting to be off work. The excuses or reasons / symptoms seem so trite to those who are really feeling badly.
  6. Princessraye

    Princessraye New Member

    I used to say I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy, now I wish almost everyone had it.
    After 16 years I am very bitter ..................I used to be a wonderful and caring person.
  7. kar1953

    kar1953 New Member

    I tend to agree with Mikie that it is a grieving process that we all have to go through. Maybe some just can't get through it alone & need someone to counsel them. I believe I have made it through the anger - for the most part. I still have my moments tho. I truly believe the healing cannot begin until the anger ends.

    Just my thoughts & hope I haven't offended anyone.

    Take care.......Kathi
  8. Smokeymar

    Smokeymar New Member

    Hi,
    I've often thought that if this disease had something visible, like open wounds, or horrible disfigurement, that the world would be easier on us. As it is, we look like healthy people, except for the limping, groaning, cane using, humans we really are. I've gotten some really nasty looks and comments when I take up a handicap parking place. Those people don't know just how much morphine, roxicodone,neurotin,lodine,trazodone, and other meds it takes to enable me to walk into a store. Sometimes I wish they did!!
    Smokey