Scared and hurting...

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by mib, Sep 1, 2006.

  1. mib

    mib New Member

    Hello, I am new here. I have been told by several people that I should have myself checked for FMS. I have been diagnosed as having Torticollis along with other severe muscle spasms. Over the past 4 or 5 years my condition has worsened drastically. I have days and weeks of severe pain in my joints and muscles - especially in my back and neck muscles and in all the joints in my arms and hands. Some of the pain never goes away and in fact gets worse every day. I also have numbness in my hands, arms, and fingers, sometimes even in my feet and lower legs. I have episodes of unexplainable dizziness. I can never get a good nights rest because my legs twitch, spasm and never feel comfortable. One of the worst things though is the chronic fatigue. I may feel rested one minute then all of a sudden its as though something sucked every ounce of energy out of my body. I go through weeks at a time at work where I feel as though I may fall over asleep from a total lack of energy.

    Today I sit here scared, asking myself why. I was not able to go to work today, I wanted to but I just physically could not do it. I have muscle spasms today in my neck, back and chest (it hurts to take a deep breath). I could not even pick up my 1 1/2 year old son this morning. I don't really have anyone to talk to about this, my wife loves me, but I know she doesn't understand and I feel constantly like I'm letting her down.

    Where do I go, I know something is wrong? I've been to my doctor for some of these symptoms and he has never suggested that I may have FM. I'm a 34 year old man with a family to support. I'm a chef at a restaurant that offers no insurance... where do I turn to first?
  2. JewelRA

    JewelRA New Member

    First of all, I am so sorry that you are going through this. It sounds like you have been dealt a heavy blow in the past year. I can really relate and empathize with you. I am a 34YO woman, and a little over a year ago my world came crashing down with this disease.

    Your symptoms certainly sound familiar and may very well be FM. I wonder if doctors are less quick to diagnose it in a man as opposed to a woman? What kind of doctor(s) have you been to? Your story is a powerful reminder that this disease does not just affect women!

    I am so sorry that you are having a horrible time right now. You have come to a great board where you will find lots of information and support. Of course, getting a proper diagnosis and finding a good doctor who will work with you are of utmost importance (and not necessarily easy to do, as you'll read here).

    Welcome, and God bless.
  3. StephieBee

    StephieBee New Member

    You sound an alot like me. It definatly isnt a good thing Ill tell ya. It is very hard having all of these problems, and I was struck by this disease when i was 18...but wasnt dx'd until I was 20 in 2001.

    The leg problem definatly sounds like RLS (Restless Leg Syndrome). There are many medications to treat that.

    You may indeed have fibro. Most, if not all, of your symptoms are typical of fibro. The best kind of doctor to go to is a rheumetologist. I was diagnosed by one after an ER doctor suggested that I may have it.

    I too, work a full time job. Everyday I think of quitting. I was on disability for 3 years, and I pushed myself to get a job seeing as I am young.

    Make an appointment with a rheumetologist ASAP so you can find some relief from the relentless pain.

    Take care of yourself


  4. Bruinz

    Bruinz New Member

    I know exactly how you feel and what you are going threw.
    I went threw the same thing you are going threw now.

    The most important thing is to find a good doctor. One that will do all the testing needed to at least give you a diagnosis. The doctor you have now may not be the best at FM/CFS. Talk to him about FM and ask for a refferal if he is not well versed in FM.

    I would suggest sharing all info you learn with your wife, that way she will in time learn and understand what you are going threw.

  5. mib

    mib New Member

    Thankyou for understanding. I won't say that I'm glad that so many others have similar problems as me, because it's awful. But it does feel better not to be alone. I feel so guilty when I'm not able to take care of everyday things around the house, or to help my wife take care of my son more. Every ounce of my energy is used up for work and lately I have nothing left at all when I get home.