Sending words of hope and love to you all...

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Thistledown, Mar 20, 2006.

  1. Thistledown

    Thistledown New Member

    I haven't been here in a while, but I was diagnosed with FM in Febrary 2004. I had been so bad I nearly had to crawl to get from my car to the house after work. I tried antidepressants and magnesium infusion. I took supplements suggested by the holistic naturopath, and I had tests for parasites and all sorts of conditions. I don't know that any of these things helped.

    I began taking Welbutrin XL (extended release formula) in June 2004 and started therapy for anxiety and depression. The Welbutrin improved my moods and the therapy gave me a chance to explore what was going on in my life.

    I still had some soreness but not as much, and I hadn't had a flare in quite some time. By October 2004 I had started exercising some. In April 2005 my life changed.

    I met someone who helped me find myself and set me on the path to freedom. This person helped me challenge the cage I had placed around myself and I have broken the chains that held me. I no longer suffer from physical pain (except when I work out really hard!) and my tender points are gone. I have had one mild cold in the last year. I have lost 50 pounds, I am learning and advancing through martial arts, I run an 11 minute mile (soon to be 10).

    I have been on a spiritual journey into myself and I found that my FM was a manifestation of the pain my spirit was enduring because I caged it. I buried my true self so deep that I couldn't find her. This dear person walked into my life and helped me find the key to unlocking my self-imposed prison. I have not taken any antidepressants in over 3 months.

    Please understand that I do not mean that I found religion. What I have is a path, a way of life. There is no prayer or place of worship, just a self-realization. I have a long way to go and so much more to learn, but I am living a thousand time better than before. It is not an easy path, nor can I promise that it will work for everyone, but I ask you to examine your hearts and see if there is an aspect of your psyche that you have trapped away becaus it didn't fit into the expected rules. Set it free, love it, nourish it.

    I send a message of hope; it is possible to recover, to live an incredible life. I don't have the key, but I can share with you my experiences. I warn you now, I don't fit societal norms, so if you cannot accept what you hear, then this path may not be for you. It is your choice. Blessings to all of you.
  2. tandy

    tandy New Member

    Less pain!? I can deal with that :)

    Sounds as if your on the right path for sure~
    whatever it is your doing,..keep it up!
    Possitive energy aids us in more ways then ever imagined!

    I myself would be interested in exactly what gave you back 'you'. Meditation?
    (which I'm learning/trying.)
    I do believe our thoughts,be them good ones or bad,do manifest according. Can make a huge impact on our health!
    But how do we reverse the damage?

    Please share~
  3. Cromwell

    Cromwell New Member

    To have recovered and be doing so well.Congratulations!

    I have read that for some, FM is a short term illness, that does have a recovery, rather like EBV, in some it lays one up for 3 or 4 months in others years or more.

    For me, I was totally happy person, gregarious and outgoing,successful, very contented, when I was hit with this illness. My spirit was already soaring. I was super fit, a runner, the whole scene.

    I have had flares of this illness for years, where I may feel terribly handicapped with it for several months, then it lifts, then, unfortunately, it reappears.

    I thank you for your blessings and message of hope, and pray that for you the flares will not return.

    Love and peace Anne C

    [This Message was Edited on 03/21/2006]
  4. Pianowoman

    Pianowoman New Member

    That's wonderful! I do believe that some inner work can help us on this road. I have been on a spiritual journey myself. It has helped me cope but hasn't so far, given me the same hope of recovery as it has for you.

    I am glad for you and wish you well.


  5. Thistledown

    Thistledown New Member

    Well, here goes...

    A long time ago I was a spirited little girl that gave my mother many gray hairs. I did everything with open enthusiasm and curiosity, and I never felt the need to apologize for who I was. I was also a very sensitive empathic person who disliked seeing anyone in physical or emotional pain. Somehow along the way I tricked myself into thinking that I was better off trying to please everyone, and I lost the little girl I had been. While I found some fulfillment in pleasing others, I did it at the expense of my inner self.

    In college (more than ten years ago) I was on a spritual quest. I took a course called Psychology and the Mystic Experience, and the teacher had explored many different spiritual paths. I went to her outside class to try and get some guidance, she said she was not the one. I sent a plea to the Universe to give me a spiritual guide.
    Three years ago a number of economic depression and lay-offs sent my husband, kids and me from one side of the country to the other.

    When I got here, I was in my worst health ever. I had just had a baby, I was 280 pounds, and my FM (which I had for years but never realized) began to take over. Then, last spring, I met my spritual guide. I began to talking with him, then I began to explore various Eastern and Western Paths (my guide was born Christian and converted to Buddhism). I began to study martial arts, Buddhism, read other Eastern and Western spiritual paths, and through the physical and mental training I rediscovered the girl I had been.

    I am now 230 pounds, running three days a week, biking three days a week, I go to martial arts class twice a week, do yoga, and so much more. I have picked up old hobbies and I am reading numerous books that are helping me on my path. I have an indoor garden in my bedroom (flats of herbs, many hot pepper plants, aloe, ivy, philodendron, spider). I have so much more energy and joy.

    I found my animal spirit guide (don't worry if you don't believe in them) and I am getting stronger and healthier every day. I still care about/for others, but I no longer hide who I am. I do a great deal many things that are unusual, both hobbies and lifestyle, but I no longer care what others think. I thought I had a good life and was relatively happy. Now I can see with clearer eyes how unhappy I was, even with the gifts of my husband and children. Now I find happiness from within.
  6. Thistledown

    Thistledown New Member

    Many of you have other triggers/causes, I am just contributing my story. FM is a valid physical illness, I BELIEVE that! I have just found that mine responded well to the changes I have made, and should I relapse, maybe I have gained some coping methods that will carry me through.

    I also have an IgM deficiency, which my doctor says "has no known associated disease", but because of it I have had to be vaccinated for measles every time I started a new job. My antibody titer goes below radar. And I have orthostatic hypotension.

    For those of you that are trying to find answers, I did not mean for this to be a cure, only a reflection of my life and what has helped me. I feel for all of you who have had chronic Lyme, Candida overgrowth, tumors, thyroid, etc. But I also believe in the somatopsychosomatic theory: what affect the body affects the mind affects the body.

    For example, you are in physical pain and are unsure why. You begin to fear the pain, which causes tension and upset throughout the balance of body systems, and your physical pain intensifies. If you learn to control the fear, and maybe, learn meditaion that calms and relaxes you, you can lower the amount of physical pain and some of the underlying tension that aggravates the pain.

    I have utmost respect for you all..

  7. RockiAZ

    RockiAZ New Member

    Thistledown, your message this morning spoke to me loud and clear. I felt my spirit become more relaxed reading all your posts, and the other ones as well.

    I used to practice Yoga daily. Now it's mild Yoga whenever I am able to using a DVD designed for FM, but still do some sort of form of it or meditation daily. I have to be careful though because I also have CFIDS, so my Yoga is very mild.

    I thoroughly enjoy the peacefulness that you receive with this practice. I'm more of a spiritual person and always look for ways to improve my health in that nature physically, emotionally and of course, spiritually. I also check in with my Chakras and learning more about them.

    Thank you for the reality check this morning. I desperately needed that!

    Live, Laugh, Love,
  8. Thistledown

    Thistledown New Member

    I send warm thoughts of peace, hope, love, and relief to you all...even if you are at peace with your inner self, may my sendings still help you. For those who are out of balance, may you find your center. I hold all of you who are suffering within the light of my heart.

    I will keep my eyes and ears open, and I will post anything I glean on the appropriate threads. Best to all of you!

  9. JLH

    JLH New Member

    I am so happy for you that you have found want helps you and what is your key to recovery.

  10. matthewson

    matthewson New Member

    I am glad you posted about your journey through this DD. I had been having a lot of anxiety attacks lately and one night, I was in such an anxious state that I decided to just sit in my comfy chair, turn off all noise and just sit for an hour and clear my mind of any thought. I really was kind of meditating and I found that my muscle pain became less pronounced, my anxiety eased up and I just felt so much better!

    I now meditate everyday from 5-6 pm. My husband and son are usually gone at this time cleaning offices (small business on the side) and I have the whole house to myself. My dog curls up on my lap and I clear my head of all thoughts. This has brought my pain levels down significantly.

    I would like to start adding more exercise to my everyday life now. I am going to start with some simple yoga and go from there.

    Thank you again for posting. I for one, think there is SOME psychological components to this DD (FMS) and even though we have physical manifestations, any reduction in the stress level of our lives can certainly help us with the physical problems. There definately is a mind/body connection for me anyway.

    Take care, Sally

    PS. I am a med tech too! Nice to meet another tech!
    [This Message was Edited on 03/22/2006]
  11. Thistledown

    Thistledown New Member

    I forget the name of the program, but Christiane Northrup and Mona Lisa Schulz practice intuitive medicine and they did a whole interview-style tape set on how the stresses in your life (job, family issues, etc) can build up in the body and manifest as cancer, heart disease, IBS, FM, and more. The key is recognizing that these physical illness cannot be truly treated until the underlying environmental stresses are dealt with. For those of you who have had physically/emotionally trying times in your lives, these will continue to cause imbalances in the physical body if they are not completely resolved in the mental.

    All of you are strong, capable, determined people, otherwise you would have succumbed to the illnesses by now, so please understand that none of this points to weakness, just that as our lives/society gets more complicated, so do the stresses that we "swallow". We need to recognize and release these stresses before we can get our bodies to heal.

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