sex drive

Discussion in 'General Health & Wellness' started by kat36, Jan 3, 2004.

  1. kat36

    kat36 New Member

    does anyone with FM seem to suffer from decreased sex drive or am I the only one? help me figure this out, it sucks.
    [This Message was Edited on 01/03/2004]
  2. maineweezie

    maineweezie New Member

    You are far from alone on this lack of libido,sex drive ,etc. how ever you want to call it.I am very glad my marraige isn't based on sex or we would have been divorced quite some time back.Was talking with my doctor about this issue last week as it is a problem for me too and he tells me many of his FMS patients have the same problem.Part of it is the constant pain and depression we live with.He has upped my antidepressant med and hopes this will help.Not sure if that will but worth a try. Weezie
  3. BonnieR

    BonnieR New Member

    I know, if you are on antidepressants, they cause a lack of sex drive. I am on effexor and it has killed my desire. My doctor did add Wellbutrin, but that really hasn't helped the sex drive. I don't know what the answer is, because I can't go off of the antidepressent, because of depression. So it is a matter of choice for me.
    Which do I want depression or sex. I agree with you it is a good thing my marriage is not based on sex. I think it is so sad though.
    If anyone has an answer I would appreciate knowing also.
    [This Message was Edited on 01/05/2004]
  4. funnygirl1960

    funnygirl1960 New Member

    Dear Kat.
    Well this is certainly a treat! To be able to help someone with an issue that has been a problem for years with no help in site.

    What you have is called WCFB. What ”MOST” women experience with no real answers in site?
    A gentleman named Mr. Adam is where this problem originated.
    WCFB (in terms) means Women Cursed From Birth!
    With no thanks to Mr. Adam for causing all this mess we women are now stuck!
    We go through minstrel cycles, child bearing, losing any or most form our beautiful body, huge breast we couldn’t keep, then left with only a possibility of being a cover model for national geographic. Stretch marks that would make any two-piece suit a real eye catcher. Nurturing to all and hoping it rubs off when you “might” need it years down the road, loss of calcium and the promise of Ostio down the road. Then we move on into Menopause, Ohhhh yippie, yes the party is not over just yet! Menopause has just kicked in. for some the mood swings are like becoming Linda Blare all over again in her infamous movie The Exorcist, Then we all get to sweat like pigs, and for no apparent reason (at any given moment) go through a hot flash. Oh the fun just doesn’t end. We then (in some cases) are expected to or really would LIKE to have some sort of sexual drive! But our little bodies have been pushed to the limit by now, But!! There is hope, Of course not without paying a price as we are women, we can take estrogen and risk, Blood clots as Estrogens may worsen blood clots or cause new clots to form, or even more exciting than that Breast cancer (active or suspected) Estrogens may cause growth of the tumor, then we can have such things as vaginal bleeding of unknown causes, cancer of the uterus lining as (once again) estrogens may make these conditions worse. Then there’s Diabetes mellitus (sugar diabetes) or Edema (swelling of feet or lower legs caused by retaining [keeping] too much body water) or Heart or circulation disease or Kidney disease, Liver disease, as Androgens can worsen these conditions, Gallbladder disease or gallstones, Liver disease Toxic, Jaundice, and who really wants to hear more? By then we’ve made up our minds to not risk estrogen and what do we do? We hope for a miracle or an answer, one’s that haven’t come without a price!
    Well the answer is here now!! It has crossed the minds of many women already, as we are women and we have always looked for the answers first ?
    Here is a short list of what most women feel would benefit them
    Go have more fun: Play on the freeway blindfolded!
    Go on long drives: Blindfolded through the Grand Canyon!
    Bungee jump: With knitting thread!
    Have a drink: Several with maybe some sleeping pills!
    Or simply do what makes you feel better about this whole situation: Slit your wrist!!

    Sweetie all we can do is humor ourselves, so far there are no real answers without paying a price. I have tried them all, heck! Trust me, and all the other women in our situation. If there were a cure for this, grocery store clerks would be a lot nicer, women wouldn’t steal your parking places, I Hopp would actually have waitresses with a smile, Department stores would be fun to shop again. And we as women could express our love again to the man we love so very much, we could enjoy sex again and get excited, we would be happy and stress no more.
    To anyone who may have a hand in the research Viagra or any upcoming research of giving women back their sex drives. We all have a news flash for you!!!
    YOUR GOING TO BE FILTHLY RICH $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
    God Bless you Kat
    I hope you did take this all as humor as this is really all you can do for right now. Please do let me know if you get any interesting info on this Curse!

    [This Message was Edited on 01/07/2004]
  5. funnygirl1960

    funnygirl1960 New Member

    I know this really is not a laughing matter for anyone, but there are simply no easy answers. I am luck just as Weezie had stated, I am so glad my relationship is not based on sex, and I’m getting married the 29th of this month, a double ceremony with my older sister, hell this should be the greatest experience for my hubby to be and I, but here I am, just like many others, stuck with the sex drive of wall paper! My gosh what I’d give to have that drive back, the men have got to feel terrible. As I said I’m so lucky, but still they do wonder if it’s them? I have FMS to top this all off, and that sure doesn’t help.
    All we can do sweetie is pray for an answer and pray for one another, that one day an answer will be found for the women, but OBVIOUSLY it hasn’t been as easy as Viagra was for the men!

    God Bless you Kat
  6. tilla

    tilla New Member

    Same thing here for me. I have FM and take Effexor. I am now trying testorone cream to see if it helps. Results don't show up for two weeks, so will let you know. If you don't hear from me, it did not work.


  7. tilla

    tilla New Member

    Does help some what, not wonder answer though.

  8. maineweezie

    maineweezie New Member

    I haven't heard from anyone of you so I am guessing none have found much for answers on this lack of sexual drive issue.I am rather lucky to know a few other local woman who also have the same types of health problems as we do and we often get together for tea party type gab fests.It helps alot to be able to talk things over with friends you can trust and believe me this is an issue that most folks with chronic pain deal with at some time or another.We had made a vow to each other to try to talk more to our mates and see if we could find some answers that might help us.

    I also had a long talk with My wonderful mate and I found out that as much as anything he is very much afraid to inadvertently(SP)cause me more pain.So if I am having a good spell and try to set the mood for abit of romance he at times decides to take me shopping or out for the day rather than tell me why he avoids me.It never occured to me that he felt like this but it does make sense in ways.Have any of you thought to try talking more to your own mates to find out more about how they feel on this issue?? It might help some. Later, Weezie
  9. Xausted01

    Xausted01 New Member

    I think mine has more to do with the pain that I am going to go through during and after.

    I have spinal problems along with fm, and my lower back and hips just can't take it anymore. I usually cry after. I try not to let my hubby see, but he has before. I know he feels awful about it. I do still have the feelings to do it, so I don't want to stop. Plus, my hubby and I are only 32. I'm not sure he would be very happy if I had to stop either.

    My doc told me that if I ever had a lower drive to have my hormones checked. Pain meds can lower your testosterone. Maybe you should have your gyn or gp check it out. The bloodwork is testosterone, progesterone & estrogen : free & clear. (That's what the doc writes on the lab order.)

    Good luck!
  10. zoya19

    zoya19 Guest


    I have basically no sex drive at all and have been married for two years now. I am also glad my marriage is not based on sex.

    My family doctor thinks I am crazy but my specialist thinks it is quite normal for people with fibro. and people taking lots of medications to have any libido at all.

    I have been taking Gingko and it seems to be helping a little bit. I found out about Gingko by doing research myself on the internet. Looking for stuff to help woman with low sex drives. It has also been helping my mental alertness a bit so it is worth trying.

    Good Luck and it is not only you.

  11. missmagnolia

    missmagnolia New Member

    I have lost all interest in sex. I am 62 and my husband and I always had a wonderful (daily..sometimes more) sex life. That is until he had an affair with a young dope addict ! When I got sick I just lost all interest, I suppose from the anti-depressants and other meds. I have even resorted to taking that stuff on television..Avilimil or whatever and I think its starting to work.. My husband's affair has been over for 2 or 3 years and he is now in a retirement home with Multiple Sclerosis and paralyzed from the waist down....except for one thing. Yep, you guessed it. He loves my visits and still enjoys sex, but I have put on so much weight from all my meds, and I have peripheral neuropathy (damaged nerve endings) and for me to get on him puts pressure on my knees and any pressure on any part of my body leaves me in unbearable pain. At least I don't find it as repulsive as I did. Its not 100% for sure, but at least its there. As you can see, I know exactly how you feel! Feel free to contact me any time you want
    miss magnolia