Shiver me timbers

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by texangal81, Jul 7, 2008.

  1. texangal81

    texangal81 New Member

    This morning I found a "wink" in my Christian Cafe (henceforth to be known as CC) inbox from a gentleman whose screen name was Piratejjv. I was immediately intrigued as I pictured a dashing Johnny Depp leaping out of my computer to whisk me away to an exotic island. I surfed to his profile where I opened the first picture and was promptly greeted by his mug shot. He had cropped out the little black sign with the numbers that they hold up in front, but I KNOW it was his mug shot. There he was in all his incarcerated glory with a black patch over his right eye. Pirate.....uh huh. Please understand I'm not discriminating against one-eyed men (although I am a bit more discriminating about one-eyed worms), I was more concerned about the mug shot. I wonder if he lost his eye in the joint. And then I had a horrifying thought, I hope he wasn't doing anything dangerous when he winked at me, he could be missing a hand now too.

    I don't understand what drives me to continue this ridiculous charade. Perhaps it feeds my daily need for humor. However, sometimes men can be cruel when protected by the facade of a website. I sent a simple message to a man whom I thought was sort of cute and his response to me was "I'm sorry, I don't date overweight women". I was appalled and terribly hurt at first, but then my anger took over and I shot back "hey, that's cool, I understand. I myself don't really care for men with receding hair lines" . I received this LONG email filled with apologies for being so insensitive. I obviously found HIS sore spot!

    I think I'm probably addicted to the internet. But that's ok, I've dealt with many addictions in the past. Right now I'm battling an addiction that has returned. They say that when you give up one addiction, you are merely trading it for another. They are so right. That ugly, evil addiction that I thought I had kicked years ago is returning. It is an overwhelming addiction that ruled my life back in those days. When I got divorced, I thought I had moved on and no longer needed that crutch. But out of the clear blue, it came back.

    What is this awful albatross around my neck???? Counted Cross Stitch. I spend hours searching for the perfect chart, then the perfect fabric, then the perfect floss. I can surf hours on the 'net looking for it (if the internet had been readily available in the early '90s, I would be a thread bum on skid row now). When I finally have the perfect combination, I then must have the perfect floss organization tool. I've been through punch cards, rings, binders, boxes, you name it. I have recently found the best system ever and like a true addict couldn't tell you the name of it if my life depended on me. I am once again obsessed with owning every color DMC makes.

    BUT in the 8 years since I've been stitch free, the world of cross stitch has changed. The fabric that I could only get mail order and paid a fortune for can be found at Wal-mart. There are local shops that stock such a variety of fabric and threads that I couldn't have even imagined it in my early days. Don't let anyone kid you - cotton embroidery floss IS a gateway thread to more expensive fibers. If silk thread could be snorted, it would be up my nose.

    Eight years has taken its toll on me, or should I say my eyes. I now need better lighting and perhaps magnification. I was consumed with finding the perfect lamp to assist me (still haven't found it). I must continue looking this week. I will set up the perfect location once I have found the perfect lamp. When I finally settle down with my tools, I will start my project. I cannot believe I have fallen again, after all these years. I pray that I get ahold of myself before I go bankrupt buying silk floss.

  2. Didoe

    Didoe New Member

    dear texangal

    it is fascinating that during marriage, you stitched; post marriage, no need. In the one sewing class we had in JHS, our final project was to make a dress, AND WEAR IT, in a fashion show.
    If you didnt wear your dress, you didnt get credit for the class. I dont know what I was doing earlier in the semester, but it wasn't sewing. In the last week of the class I bought 3-4 yds of a ghastly peach fabric on sale and eyeballed-traced out an A-line dress shape, hand sewed both sides together and tried it on. THere was no way I was wearing that in public.

    I never learned to knit except redundant rows and went thru a period of scarf making. Loved crewel but the slow tedious stitching to make every stitch exact set my nerves on edge.

    Then 2.5 yrs ago, preparing to file for divorce after being in a domestic violence situation, I needed something to focus on, something so consuming that conversation of any kind would not be possible. Embroidery seemed to be just the thing. eBay had sewing lots with thread, leftover canvas, needles, everything I needed to get started and keep my mouth shut.
    I was too busy doing embroidery to watch the WWE as men beat one another to a pulp, I couldnt stop stitching to enjoy the porn he found online and insisted on sharing, I was so caught up with embroidery that after cooking and serving him dinner and then as was my duty, sitting there as he ate, quickly took up my needle and thread again, rather than eat.

    Embroidery was great for losing those months of living in a silent void, so frightened I would speak and give away my plans to divorce, I could sit in the same room and be miles away, pushing a needle innocently in and out...usually caught up in his own bubble only once he asked when I started sewing...?

    Embroidery...hours of sitting in total silence, planning when to stuff which personal papers into what bag of garbage that was going out the next morning...he couldnt even be bothered taking out a bag of trash, it wound up being the means of getting everything I owned, out of my own apartment to safety.

    I embroidered an intricate tea cup with violets, designed and stitched a small cottage with a garden, a home I will never have, a catnip pillow for Cat who didnt live long enough to play with it and a birthday bookmark for my son.

    Once he was removed, the plastic bag of threads, needles canvas scraps was put away. I bought a frame and keep the tiny stitched tea cup on the wall over my bed. I dont care if I never sew a damned thing again.
  3. greygodess

    greygodess New Member

    Didoe: Glad the embroidery got you through.

    Gal: I used to embroider and last year bought a baby blanket to do. I started it but that is as far as it got. I crocheted for years and stopped for awhile and then picked it up about 12 years ago. I still do that and some knitting. Mostly scarves and shawls.

    I love to get the catalogues and look at all the things I would love to do but would never live long enough unless I did it 15 hours a day. So keep on embroidering. It's a good thang. Godbless

    ps: I know what you mean about sore spots. My brother would always mention my weight. One day I mentioned his bald spot. That stopped that. Funny he didn't notice when I lost 20 lbs.[This Message was Edited on 07/07/2008]
  4. therealmadscientist

    therealmadscientist New Member

    Is anyone doing something to protect our children and vulnerable adults? lol
  5. sisland

    sisland New Member

    A Question if i may,,,,,Reading through this post has been enlightening!,,,,,My Q. is Why do some people think it's necessary to point out our flaws? such as our wheight,,,our hair style our choice of clothing etc! My Oldest brother and his wife do this to me when i visit,,comments like "Whose Been choppin' on your hair"?,,,,Or "you need to walk more",,,,it gets worse!!

    This goes on and on!,,,,,,I wouldn't personaly think of asking them some of those questions,,,,but hey after reading about your comebacks to people who feel it necessary to insult you,,,,it's inspireing!,,,,

    Thanks in advance for your replies,,,,,Sis,,,,,,p.s. i love to sew and embroidery,,,,,was trying to teach myself how to Knit and crochet but havn't mastered yet!

    [This Message was Edited on 07/11/2008]