Single, how to cope

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by tjo, Feb 16, 2013.

  1. tjo

    tjo Member

    I'd like people to share with me how they cope with their Fibro. being single. I get so lonesome sometimes and just need a hug and validation.
  2. luigi21

    luigi21 Member

    Hi, ive been on my own for a number of years with fibro, my family never really bothered to understand. As soon as i became imperfect they weren't interested. They can be so nasty sometimes i just wish it on one of them as bad as that sounds you havent met them. My non immediate family are more interested but they live in london. So i buy in bulk, use a shopping trolley to move most things, still can get backlash of really bad fatigue and tight muscle spasms. I make the most of the days i have about two hours of energy in my tank. I go to the library and out to the local parks especially if its sunny out love the woodland. I talk to almost anyone this type of conversation i do well when theres no commitment. But with regards to the fibro the only people who understand are those who have it. Do i either go to a support group or come here. There are some really nice people here sometimes ive got things going on and havent been here for a while but they never leave a post unanswered. So yeah its stocking up for the bad days which are many i buy long life milk just incase i cant get out. And making the most of the few days you have energy. You have to learn to parent yourself with this condition. Hugs x
  3. neoplus1

    neoplus1 Member

    Up until last May I was in an 8 year relationship but she couldn't handle me being ill anymore and the relationship fell apart. I was so devastated.

    I am the type of person who likes being in a serious, committed relationship. I don't like dating around and having flings or anything like that. I have always been that way.

    I am not saying I would be in a relationship just for its own sake, it would have to be with a partner that is meant for me, but I don't like being single much either.

    My family is ignorantly understanding.

    They don't know really anything about CFS and Fibro, but aren't mean to me or anything about it. They at least recognize that I have both of these illnesses and can be very disabling. They can be careless sometimes, but not intentionally.

    Perhaps someone should start a Fibro/CFS/Chronic Illness dating site! I think that would be cool.

  4. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Fatigue is the biggest barrier to our getting out and socializing. Also, many of us have sensory overload and can't stand confusion, noise, harsh lighting, etc. Over the years, I have gotten closer to my neighbors both single and married. Just to get out for a simple meal can restore one and help diminish lonliness. If one reads, it's usually easy to find another who would enjoy the same book and discuss it. Before long, it can turn into a book club.

    We will hug each other if we sense one of us needs it. We call ourselves, Our Florida Family just as those of us over on the Chit Chat Board consider ourselves Our Online Family. We keep up with each other's kids, grandkids, pets, etc. We send virtual warm and healing hugs. These things may not take the place of a "real" family or significant other but they bind us together and ensure that we aren't alone.

    I've been single 26 years and love it. I was lonely in my marriage. After my divorce, I sowed my wild oats so I now have no regrets. I'm lucky in that I didn't get sick til later in life.

    My advice is to get involved at whatever capacity possible. If nothing more, join us on the Chit Chat Board. We have a Porch group and a Lounge group. Y'all are invited to either or both. They are like friends getting together over a cup of coffee or tea. Friendship is as close as one's computer.

    Love, Mikie