Sister hung up on me

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by NyroFan, Jan 9, 2007.

  1. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    Hello all:

    The symptoms are getting to me. I have to take two cabs to get my prescitions for cash (another post).

    My sister listened to me for about 15 minutes. I call her every night in Florida. i was really upset. Do you know what she did? She hung up on me.

    I was shocked. I feel so terrible. Usually I have more of an upbeat attitude, but feel that this disease will kill me.
    I just can not take it anymore. i know I have to, but my God, why will not people understand?

    I call my sister ever single night. We just chit-chat, but I told her of my problem and told her how upset I was and she hung up.

    I am shocked. Any advice?

    nyrofan
  2. Catseye

    Catseye Member

    Well, not too funny, ironic maybe. My friend Anna has FM and I have CFS. Since I've moved to the DR, I haven't given her my phone number. We used to talk alot but since she got really bad, all she talks about is misery and how she hates her dad and how screwed up her life is and how the chiro won't treat her because she won't pay and how she can't find a decent guy who'll call her back after sex . . ad infinitum.

    It was like a broken record and I literally couldn't stand it anymore. It would get ME stressed just listening to her. No matter what I suggested, she shot it down and wouldn't budge with her attitude. And it's sad because I was about the only one who would still talk to her. She's been married once and probably never will again. She's not ugly, just really airheaded. She's been in like 8 car accidents, most of which were her fault, and even when we were in high school together, she got straight D's.

    I guess the whole thing was that every single thing she said was "negative" and it just made this dark cloud hover over every conversation and it just made me not want to talk to her anymore. It's been a year, now, so maybe I'll call her and try again.

    Is there a chance the phone battery died or something or are you sure she hung up? I think maybe she was getting like me with Anna. Some people just don't want to hear it for whatever reason. My own husband will not discuss my disease with me. He will do anything for me, even feed me and carry me around when I needed it but I really got no comforting conversation with him about it, but that's okay. He has never once complained or tried to blame me.

    I guess all you can do is maybe try to talk about something else for awhile, or just not anything negative, and leave the ranting for us. After all, we can relate better than anybody else. I've noticed that I can't really talk about my disease related problems with anyone. They always change the subject.

    So get on here, let it all fly without holding back, cuss like this &^%$#@!! if necessary, and THEN call your sister after you've gotten it out of your system!We like to hear other's ridiculous things we have to put up with. It makes us know we aren't the only one and gives us something to muse over while we're waiting on a post!

    Just call her back tomorrow and pretend it didn't happen.

    best wishes for you,

    karen
  3. Lynna62

    Lynna62 New Member

    I'm sorry you are feeling so bad and that your sister hurt your feelings. I wish I had some advice for you. Maybe she was having a bad day also and just didn't feel like she could cope? Maybe she feels frustrated because she can't "fix things for you" ? Just a thought....

    Hope you feel better soon.

    ((hugs))
    Lynna
  4. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    karen;

    Good story, good advice.I will try to call her tomorrow,but I really do not want to. She never calls me because of $$$.

    I am really down today and do not usually complain, but thought of coming her and letting it all out.

    Thanks, hon.

    nyrofan
  5. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    karen;

    Good story, good advice.I will try to call her tomorrow,but I really do not want to. She never calls me because of $$$.

    I am really down today and do not usually complain, but thought of coming her and letting it all out.

    Thanks, hon.

    nyrofan
  6. musikmaker

    musikmaker New Member

    Really sorry to hear you got your feelings hurt so badly. It seems family are the ones that can hurt us the most. There really is no good answer to this.

    You can do as others suggested and call her acting like nothing happened.

    You can call her and ask her why she hung up on you.

    You can call her and tell her off

    You can never call her again.

    If you love your sister, and it seems you do, all of the options kind of stink huh? I would have to ask her why she hung up so that we could move on. Though I would need to be mentally ready to hear soemthing that might hurt me even more.

    I went through several years not really talking with family as they hurt me so bad over a break up. I found I missed them and it was much harded to rebuild our relationships after all that time. As I got older I decided that sharing time with my syblings was more important than not forgiving for the times they have hurt me.

    Think about it and follow your heart. You will do what is right for you. Take care.
  7. Dara

    Dara New Member

    I have two daughters and they hang up on each other all the time. Sometimes I think they do it just so they can hang up before the other one does.

    Also, I have a sister, and yes I've hung up on her before too.

    Do you think maybe your sister really loves you and maybe when you started telling her about your illness it could have scared her?

    Nobody wants to see a loved one hurt and suffering, and maybe this was the only think she knew of to do.

    Just a suggestion, good luck.

    Dara
  8. PVLady

    PVLady New Member

    I don't know the problem or reason, I would also be upset she did not have the courtesy to say she did not want to talk about it.

    Perhaps she felt too overwhelmed to deal with it for some reason - even so, she could have signed off.

    Because of the hang up, I would not call her until she calls. That was not right and guess what? You do not owe her or anyone a apology for "venting".

    You have serious problems and anyone would want to let it out once in a while, especially to a family member. Too bad you did not know she could not handle it.

    It was cruel to do that to you. Not knowing your sister I cannot judge but if my brother did that to me, forget it.

    Try very hard not to let this upset you. I know it is hard but try. You did not do anything wrong here. If it is a crime to want emotional support or a little sympathy once in a while - we would all be in trouble.