So What Do You Think About 'Therapists'?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by NyroFan, Nov 17, 2006.

  1. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    Hello all:

    I do not know about this. I have tried'therapists' in the past and they seem nutier than me.

    Others are know-it-alls.

    I went to psychiatirist the other day, told her my problems with FM/CFS and she told me it was 'all in my head' and that she would prescribe something for 'paranoia' and thatIwas a hypochondria.

    I left.

    Can you imagine?

    I was so hurt. So.... now my pain was from hypochondria from pain.

    I was ready to spit tacks.

    When I got ready to go I told her I would not see her again.

    She asked me 'why' and I told her I needed time to talk.

    Well....there went another therapist.


    nyrofan
  2. lenasvn

    lenasvn New Member

    Throw her some educational documents and report her. I have had a wonderful (not therapist,but counselor for 2 yrs. She believes in our DD's, and she never voiced her opinion without me asking,and without researching the subject first.

    I have a new counselor now, I don't feel connected with her,I don't even think I like her. She is alittle more opinionated than the former. Kepp looking until you find someone humble and wise that fits you better.

    On a personal note, this woman sure p*** me off!
  3. b~kay~b

    b~kay~b New Member

    The first one i saw made me mad i mean how is someone going to challenge me in my anser? Okay he asked abut what my husband does.. i didnt tell him the truth...but he doesnt know that! anyway my husband did not want me to share with this doc (first visit) about my husbands sickness he has pshizoaffective disorder and ptsd (post traumatic stress disorder)and a massive depressive, he was in the army saw and did stuff that triggered it, 100% service connceted disabled vet. my husband refers to it as "early retirement" so i honored his wishes, i answered the doc and said early retirement (they did at one time offer that not sure if they still do though)anyway he said that doesnt make sense and you all own your own home and dont worry about bills neither one of you working now, he sat there calculated his age and time, i said "look i told you my answer, no we dont worry about bills, what can man do to us? report us? oooo scary! my husband worked hard, he went to honduras saw things did things and they offered him an early out" which is true, he didnt accept it but the doc didnt knwo that either. my husband finished his term. but i told him they offered him an amount of money and he invested well. "i cant go into details, i have to honor my husband but you can look things up, i think a segment was on 60 minutes about some thinsg not all thigns but some if you are that concerned about my answer". i left it at that- ticked me off, i shouldnt even have to go that far, mr know it all. but anyway,then i go to my second appointment and someone else is there i dont know, to take his place,i actually liked this guy it ws short and sweet. he asked me the questions, listened to the ansers and then said you need some sleep why havent anyone helped yu with this pain and your sleep you need to work on this especially since this is a major symptom of fm i prescribe certain meds to my fm patients lets try this, in which i saw a respone on elavil im a little worried about, sounds like me on nortripiline but at least he acknowledge the symptoms were real and i wasnt the only one he has dealt with. he said everyone is different jsut gotta figure out what can help you i cant tell you how long that will take though. in which i've come to realize this. but if the doc acts like youre crazy time to move on i hope he is there from here on out i forgot to ask darn memory.
  4. Callum

    Callum New Member

    I'm sorry you had such a bad experience. Therapists, doctors, ministers, husbands/wives - there are a lot of options out there, and some are going to be a good fit, some a bad fit.

    My therapist is wonderful. She does believe in both CFS and FM, and when I say "believe", I mean she thinks that it is an autoimmune disorder that causes sever physical symptoms.

    She does think that there is a correlation between the mental and physical, and creating the best possible mental environment is a top priority in getting well.

    I have found that, for me, the cognitive behavioral therapy has helped most with dealing with the DD in the following ways:

    -How I respond when I have a flare. How do I maintain a positive attitude without beating myself up, and feeling like it is some personal failure on my part. I have noticed quite a difference in the recovery time since I've integrated this into my health maintenance plan.

    -How I deal with stress. Stress, as we know, can be a trigger. I don't know if it is the same with everyone who has CFS & FM, but it's like my body doesn't know the difference between emotional stress and physical stress, and it doesn't know the difference between good and bad stress. It treats all stress the same, and it attacks it!
    So, learning coping mechanisms of how to deal with that stress when it comes along has helped me hold the illness at bay.

    Now, some therapists would say "See, you weren't suffering from an illness, you were suffering from stress!" But many don't. To them, stress is just a contributing factor in how well or poorly we handle the illness.

    -Tools to ask for what I need from others and myself. If my partner wants to go two-stepping, and I don't have the energy, I have to learn that it is okay to say "no", and to do it in such a way that he won't feel bad asking the next time.

    I also have to be "mentally healthy" enough to look at a stack of work that needs to get done by ___ time, and be honest and say, "It is not that I am incapable of doing this work. It is that I am not capable of doing it under the time constraint I'm under. I need to ask for help. This is not a failure." The failure, of course, would be to force myself to do it all, and then suffer through the next week of flare.

    This has all helped me on my road to managing the illness. It is not a cure, and the therapist never promised me one. That's why I trusted her.

    Best to you!

    Callum
  5. Catseye

    Catseye Member

    Because of the ones I went to for disability, I think they are just like regular doctors: not much more than drug salesmen. I only went because I was told to explore every avenue possible to treat my cfs. But when I tell them my symptoms, they try to convince me I'm depressed and I need antidepressants! I'm not depressed at all! I'm perfectly happy and optimistic! It's just sometimes I can't move from sheer exhaustion.

    I actually started arguing with one idiot one time and asker her why she thought I was depressed. It was because of her questionnaire: I checked the box that said: I have lost interest in talking to my friends. Granted, I guess I shouldn't have checked it but for brain fog and when I explained it's not because I don't want to talk to my friends but more like I get too tired from talking and don't realize it 'til I crash and therefore I usually avoid it she still tried to convince me how depressed I was.

    I told her I was on them during the antiviral chemo for hep c only because my dumb, butt of a doc insisted I'd need them and I was naive enough to believe him. That zoloft made me into a zombie and one day I forgot to take it and the next day was a new level of hell I never thought existed. I weaned myself off them AMA over a couple of weeks. I guess they work for some people but I can't imagine how. For an hour, she tried to convince me I was depressed, she was the expert and how all my problems may just disappear if I try a few antidepressants until I find the right one! I wonder how much incentives in the forms of bonuses and convention trips she gets from these psycho pills!
    Now I had a real problem: I had been diagnosed with depression but was refusing treatment!! That's no way to win disbability!

    I'll only need therapy if I have to go see another therapist. I guess I unlucked out and got the dummies, it's a good thing I didn't really need one. I ended up winning my case anyway, karen
  6. yellowbird

    yellowbird New Member

    I think therapy is largely a self-esteem-building exercise for the therapists...
  7. Clay2

    Clay2 New Member

    My wife sent me to hers. She'd been helped with self esteem issues. I had PTSD. The 'therapist' insisted my hallucinations were fantasies and that I just daydreaming. Hello, I have such nightmares that I haven't slept in 10 days and I'm having hallucinations, dear. Even I can tell the difference. I also had to walk away.

    Years later I found the courage to go to a PhD in psychology. He coached me through cognitive behavioral therapy, and like Callum above, it worked well. My PTSD is almost resolved. I'd follow this therapist over a cliff if he asked.
  8. PVLady

    PVLady New Member

    I am laughing at your post remembering my last experience.

    My regular therapist referred my to a psychiatrist to evaluate if my medications were okay.

    He was very brash, rushed, and would not allow me to answer his questions. I thought immediately he was the one with the problem. He acted like a weirdo and treated me like I was a bother.

    I don't need any of that, I grew up with it, had enough for a lifetime.

    He concluded our meeting by announcing I was either Bi Polar, or had Adult Attention Deficit.

    How could he determine anything when I was never allowed to answer his questions. What a jerk he was!!!

    I left fast and never looked back. I called to tell his assistant they would not see me again.

    He left a few messages wanting to know who else I was seeing, which was none of his business. I was not seeing anyone else. Based on my experience with him, I would never voluntarily see a psychiatrist again.

    A regular therapist, yes... but not someone like him.
  9. netnut

    netnut New Member

    I have managed to find a gem of a therapist.

    She is my biggest ally right now. She doesnt claim to understand all my pain but she worries about me and cares about me and is there for me to talk to when I need to vent.

    I also have bipolar, ptsd and borderline personality traits/disorder...not sure if I fall completely into the disorder.

    My psychiatrist is a total moron but we just use him to get the meds filled. The therapist and the shrink work in the same office and she runs interference for me.

    My biggest problem with this agency is that it is a county mental health and they see so many sub abuse patients so the psychiatrist just assumes everyone is a drug abuser. He doesnt take the time to get to know his patients like me who came to him from private practice because we lost insurance and werent sub abusers. I have to go in monday and fight with him to get my klonopin back. Ive tried it his way for a year and it isnt working.
  10. julieisfree05

    julieisfree05 New Member

    ..can be your most passionate advocate, but a bad one can hurt more than just about anything..

    I've been lucky to have had two amazing therapists who basically helped me deal with having a chronic illness, offered practical advice, and gave me a place to vent.

    One had no experience with FM/CFS, but was willing to learn, and extremely compassionate.

    The second (and current) actually HAS CFS/Lupus! She knows first-hand how difficult it can be to live with these illnesses and my goal upon meeting her was to get to be as functional as she was.

    Thanks to the Xyrem, I've passed her in the health area - although I still aspire to be as grounded as she is... :)

    - julie (is free!)