solitary life

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by LindaW, Oct 15, 2003.

  1. LindaW

    LindaW New Member

    Does anyone else feel like having this illness fm resigns you to a solitary life. The pain lately has been awful(I think the cold weather has started a terrible flare) I no longer work we have moved across the country and I now realize the friends I have made in the past were all at my workplace. i am in my mid-fifties now and I just can't beleive my life has stopped like it has. I know God will never leave me and I do feel his presence- but it sure would be nice to have a friend to just have a cup of tea with. We live in one of the most beautiful seaside vacation spots on the New England coast but have not been able to find a church. (it is not like we are church hoppers, the last church we stayed in for 5 years- but it was just basically Sunday service , bible studies and that it is . Our pastor when we finally said the reason that we were leaving said we have to understand that people today are really busy. Maybe that is so, but what doesa person do for friends when their world has stopped because of chronic pain. I'm sorry that this is so long, but I am glad s that I have a place to go to expressm how I feel. Needles s to say my husband and I have given up on church but not God
  2. Takesha

    Takesha New Member

    Someone on the FMS board made the statement that to have friends we must work at it too, and with out energy levels such as they are etc, we probably don't reach out as much as we used to. Also, people are very busy, and don't just drop in for a cup of tea like they used to. My bestest ever friend moved back to Newfoundland two years ago. Thinking of her at times brings tears to my eyes, because I miss her and her husband so. They were the type to drop by, bring a box of crackers and cheese, plop down on the sofa and turn on my TV. to watch a favorite show of theirs. Not a day passed that I wasn't at their apartment or they were at mine. They have been irreplacable. I know other people and am a friendly person, but I don't have the energy to do "outings" or plan dinners etc.
    About the Church issue. When I first moved here, I got out the yellow pages, looked for listings of the church of my preferecne and called each one. I explained I was new in the area, and asked questions about their doctrines, the size of the church etc. They were all pretty nice about answering my questions, some even sent pamplets about there services and activities. I think I visited maybe two before I decided on a favorite. You might try that approach, and sometimes they might ask if you'd like a home visit, at least one of the ones I called did.
    I pray now that in the name of Jesus, a special person will cross your path with whom you can build a lasting a full friendship not just for yourself but for your husband also. The Father see's our needs and is faithful, and he will meet you at your point of need.
    Hugs to you.
  3. ValleyGirl89

    ValleyGirl89 New Member

    I will be praying for you! Hope that God will send you someone to be a true friend soon! I am still searching for a church to go to in my little area of the world too and sometimes, it can be such a let down when you can't seem to find one that you feel will accept you. I will pray that you will soon find a church too.
  4. Adl123

    Adl123 New Member

    I can hear your sadness. It is a great loss, that of a religious community. My mom's church was closed when she ws already 87. A lot of older people were left without a church to go to. She tried the one recommended, but they were not welcoming. I tried to find one for her,too, to no avail. Then she was dying and was in a skilled nursing facility, because I was too sick to lift her. I tried and tried to get a minister to go talk to her, but no one would go. I even phoned the head of the presbytery, but he would not go, either. The only person who would go see her was the chaplain of the medical facility, an ex Catholic priest. So, when she died, this wonderful lady, who had always participated in her church community, had a stranger at her funeral. This has made me very angry. Times really have changed, and money seems to be more important than people, even to those who should care. I will keep you in my prayers. Perhaps some good will come out of this, and you will discover God anew, in your own way. Hugs, Terry