ssdi mental health exam and very depressed

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by courtney5771, Aug 19, 2003.

  1. courtney5771

    courtney5771 New Member

    He asked me question's that were stupid and stupid math and memory stuff. Going there made me even more depressed he told me I needed to be in weekly or bi-weekly psychotherapy I was so bad. I am pretty sure I will get benefits. He also told me that I don't take care of myself in any aspect of my life. That hit me really hard. He asked why I hadn't been in therapy in 1 year and I said I thought I was doing ok- depression is normal to me. The visit shook me up some and hit reality buttons. At least he was through. I'm really depressed now.

    Hugs,
    Courtney

  2. kimkane

    kimkane New Member

    i to was very depressed after the so-called shrink talked to me, it was the same as yours. did you have to see him because of fibro/cfs or depression, or all of them??
    i was denied 2 weeks ago andf am going to a lawyer this thrusday. i suffer from such horrible pain i cannot think alot of the time, and i am always very worn out. this has been going on for three years now. hopefully you will get your claim approved, god bless kim
  3. courtney5771

    courtney5771 New Member

    I had to see the shrink b/c of fms and depression and anxiety. Thank you for responding. I hope my claim will be approved, too. Why was yours denied?

    C
  4. Ahorsesoul

    Ahorsesoul New Member

    Courtney, Congratulations on your health exam. I see this as a good step. I always told my doctor I was not depressed, after all I had reason to feel so rotten. Now that I am feeling better I can look back and see I was depressed by the pain. Give yourself 15 minutes daily to be upset over the findings of this exam (cry, kick, scream, throw something (an egg is good). Set a timer. Then be done for the day. Then celebrate the fact that someone has figured out how rotten you really feel. If you had been told there was nothing wrong with you, wouldn't that be more depressing? I think you did very well with this health exam. Remember you will always be an Angel in the eyes of someone. Warm wishes to you.
  5. barbaradh

    barbaradh New Member

    I had my SSDI psych exam the end of July. He spent almost an hour doing stupid tests on me. I needed to take a break, but he kept telling me he was almost finished. He finally let me go to the bathroom after the stupid testing, then spent all of 30 minutes talking to me. I've had psych exams before, and know what is traditionally asked. But this guy got stuck on my childhood abuse (something I had years of therapy for and doesn't pertain to my current condition). He didn't ask about my current state of mind. After 30 minutes, he said "well, we're all done." I about lost it. I had to interject, while he was standing holding the door knob, that I think about death every day, pray every night that God will take me, and wish an 18-wheeler would plow into me. He didn't write any of this down, and it took SSA all of three days to make my determination - I was denied. The prospect of having to appeal (I have a lawyer, but know that there is much more paperwork ahead to fill out again), after the reasons they gave me for the denial, is about the last thing that I can handle right now emotionally. I have suicidal thoughts daily now, and have given up hope.

    I really hope you get approved.

    Barbara
  6. shazz

    shazz New Member

    Please take stock of those suicidal thoughts NOW.
    I too have death thoughts, but not to the point of doing anything about it. There is a difference. I "fantasize" about death all the time. I wish for it, I want it, I even have visions of my own funeral, because I think if this fm kills me "they" will be sorry for not believing me when I said I was very will.
    Weird huh?
    Please though if you are thinking of harming yourself, get some help now, you can't do it, not to yourself or others in your life who care. I have dealt with a suicide and it never ever goes away for those left behind.
    I know the feelings of going through this, the feeling like total sh*t every day, and thinking nobody believes you. I too am going through the SSI bullcrap, I am sick of filling out the forms that ask the same damned questions over and over. I have not been denied yet, but I know it's coming so have somewhat prepared myself for that.
    I guess that is all I have to say, so take care of yourself, and please if that urge overwhelms you get help right away.

    Hugs,

    Shazz
  7. barbaradh

    barbaradh New Member

    I just mainly fantisize all the time about it - it's my happy thought, actually. Because I believe that when we die, all of our pain goes away and we are in a much better place. I don't want to do it to get back at anyone - I think about doing it because I don't know how much longer I can stand this pain and fatigue, not to mention all of the other crap I'm going thru (SSA denying my claim, doctors not listening to me or not believing me, etc.). We're all going thru pretty much the same thing. I just don't understand why this disease is not taken seriously. Is it because it mainly strikes women? My only thoughts of revenge are for a lot of these doctors, and especially the people at SSA (God, that would be great) to actually GET fibromyalgia themselves, and for them to get jerked around about it like we are. There have been 4 suicides in my family, so I know what it does to a family and I wouldn't want to do that to my husband or kids. But there is a limit to what people can take. Dr. Kavorkian (sp?) is my hero. But yes, I am going to get help. I'm thinking of checking myself into a psych ward, although I think the only thing that is going to really pull me out of this depression is for my pain and fatigue to get under control. I'm averaging 20 hours per day laying down or in bed because of the pain and/or fatigue. This can't be 'fixed' by talk therapy, and I'm already on antidepressants.

    Barbara
  8. Seagull

    Seagull New Member

    I am going to have a tape recorder in my pocket! My attorney's secretary should be able to transcribe the conversation for the case file, if needed. And, I am not going into that exam alone -- I will take my hubby or mother along.

    seagull
  9. lisa_isnt_home

    lisa_isnt_home New Member

    hi this is my first time here but, yeah suicide was there thinking about it all the time angry at god for either not curing me or killing me. lost all my friends job 25yr marriage none of the family understood thought it was in my head always had been sick since a child yeah and had sexual and physical abuse from both parents growing up endometriosis two c sections and hysterectomy at 30 etc etc in constant pain no one wants to know me because I look like death warmed over most of the time, family just thinks i am lazy and want attention even tho this has been going on forever you dont get attention you get the opposite people dont want to know you at least that is my case and i dont blame them i wasnt very pleasant angry all the time any way i did attempt suicide year before last and had no problems getting ssd
  10. lisa_isnt_home

    lisa_isnt_home New Member

    I didnt get ssd for my fibromyalgia, I am getting it for being chronically depressed... lol go figure good luck
    lisa
  11. tnnanatx

    tnnanatx New Member

    I know how hard it is (the pain). Have you been given any pain meds? I felt like you until I finally told my DR I can't take anymore pain. I told her she had to help me or I'd fix it myself. I'm now on pain meds and it helps most of the time. I haven't yet filed for SS partly because of all the horror stories I read about.