I have been sick with flu-like symptoms for days after cleaning up mold with bleach water. My husband has been asked so many times to help with the housework and never any action. I got tired of griping and feeling stressed out about it and decided I was going to take care of my needs period. I sleep when I want, eat and drink when and what I want, watch tv when I want, read when I want, answer the phone when I want log on the computer when I want, freshen up when I want and sleep in another bedroom. It is so calming. I figured my husband would complain but since he doesn't see messes that are in front of his nose why would he. If he asks if I've fixed a meal I say no, I don't feel stong enough to cook -- this is what is available. After the ninth day of this he is beginning to be a little kinder but still no help with the house. I will take care of it when I feel better. Stressing over what he thinks is not going to help me get better so I won't. Took me 15 years to learn that. If I lifted my head he thought I was well and ready to fix supper and babysit the grandkids and so I tried. Of course this only works for empty nesters or those with older children. It took my kids years to learn that yes, mother was really in that much pain. Why did I stress over this for so long?