Tears of Exhaustion

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by MsE, Jun 17, 2012.

  1. MsE

    MsE New Member

    I am seventy-seven and have been battling CFIDS for over fifteen years. I'm so tired I find myself fighting tears periodically. I want to go to bed and just stay there, but I made the mistake of adopting a little three-year-old Shih Tzu from the Humane Society.

    Yes, it was a mistake because he has turned into a very lively little pooch. Loving, intelligent, but lively. I have thought about re-homing him, but I just can't. First, because I do not approve of getting rid of a pet once it has bonded with you. Second, because I love the little mutt!

    Ever since getting the dog, daily walks have become a necessity as he refuses to poop in his own little yard. My children will come next weekend and enlarge his fenced area for him. That may help. However, the damage has been done. I'm in an exacerbation that makes me want to curl up and die.

    What do you do when CFIDS or FIBRO exhaustion reduces you to tears that come on unexpectedly and embarrassingly? MsE
  2. MsE

    MsE New Member

    I should have added that another part of the scene is that I have developed neuropathy from last year's mastectomy, and also have developed peripheral neuropathy in my right hand. It makes life painful and difficult to manage some daily tasks--like buttoning my shirts. Sounds silly, but it is just another darned thing to deal with and I don't have any reserves.

    Just need support and understanding. Someone? Anyone?
  3. MsE

    MsE New Member

    Okay. Good reminder that we are all hurting in one way or another. I guess my real concern is why the tears? They sneak up on me for no good reason. I've been putting it down to exhaustion, but I'm not sure if that's reasonable. They show up without provocation and I find it embarrassing.

    Oh--and giving away my dog would probably be the sensible thing to do, but I just can't. At least, not now. I live alone and he is company--though a heck of a lot of work.

    But, back to my main question: why the tears? Does anyone else deal with unexpected, unexplainable tears?
  4. MsE

    MsE New Member

    What hormones? Just joking, but at 77 I think mine have all dried up and turned into dust. :) Thyroid is good, though.
  5. MsE

    MsE New Member

    My GP would never prescribe anything like DHEA or Pregnenalone. If it isn't something on the Medicare approved list, he won't deal with it. By the way, what the heck is Pegnenalone? Never heard of it.
  6. jole

    jole Member

    Leah described the feeling so well....the total exhaustion. Sweetie, when those tears come, there's nothing you can do but let them go. Sometimes it's good for us to let go of that stress! Docs call it depression....I call it frustration. The need to feel productive and useful is a very human element, and suddenly we feel we no longer are because our illness won't allow us to do the things we once did.

    I miss the sense of accomplishment, of starting something and being able to finish it...and find most of my tears come because that's no longer a reality, even though every night I have my list of things I want to do the next day (and know it's impossible). Heck, sometimes the exhaustion is so bad it's hard to remember to breathe, much less DO anything!

    Your little doggy....it's very lucky to have such a caring person as you, and that has to be hard. I can see it in my mind, and know how cute it is! :) Maybe someone in your family could take it? Or a friend? I'm thinking once it's a little older it may not be so much work for you, and will make a better companion. Pets sure have a special place in our lives, but they can also be overwhelming when there's no energy.

    Wishing you all the best.....hugs...Jole
  7. MsE

    MsE New Member

    Thank you so much for the support you offer. This has been a difficult day, and returning to this site is all I could think of to do. I have found solace here in the past; today I found it again. Thank you! MsE
  8. joanierav

    joanierav Member

    i cant give you much advice about the dog, sorry. but i can tell you about the tears. in fact you reminded me about them. i havent gotten them in a long long while. but i used to get them whenever i was in a cfs relapse. and like you they were beyond my control. it was very embarrassing. because ppl thought i was in a depression or having a nervous breakdown.

    i knew differently, i was just plain utterly exhausted. to the breaking point. in a completely weakened state. and then the tears would come. no control over them. they are kinda like a crying jag. mostly when ppl were around me, or someone would call me up on the phone, and ask how i was feeling, then it would start.

    maybe the dog exascerbated your illness . you didnt say if you had cfs. he may be the cause . did you have uncontrollable crying before you had him.

    it is a hard call . but like jam. my kids are always after me to get a pet , because i live alone and am lonely. but i say , i can hardly take care of myself without worry ing about a pet.

    i remember yrs ago when i was well and being out of cat and/or dog food and having to run to the store for the food at midnite. but i was young and well then. i dont want to take any chances now. i will leave well enough alone.

    i dont think i was very helpful , but i did want you to know that you are not alone and am thinking of you tonight.

    love, and hugs. joanierav
  9. MsE

    MsE New Member

    Yes, getting the dog did aggravate a cfs exacerbation. But the crying jags were going on before that. This has been a difficult few months. One of my brothers and my only sister died. I've gone downhill since my sister's death in February.My kids don't know about all the tears.

    They do know the dog has been a trial for me, but they believe that the enlarged yard will make a big difference. We'll see. It's just all so overwhelming. If only the neuropathy would ease, that would help a lot. If I could sleep well at night....if, if, if. Oh well. Such is life, huh?

    Again, my thanks to all of you. MsE
  10. Beadlady

    Beadlady Member

    Could you afford to hire a dog walker? Maybe even a teen ager in your neighborhood would walk the dog once a day for a small fee or maybe for free. Lots of Junior and High schools have mandatory volunteer projects for students.

    I have a medium size dog that I can no longer take for walks due to problems in my lower back and hip. It has been very hard to let that go--as walking the pooch has always been a special time for me & the pooch.

    Now I just try to take myself for a walk every day and I stop to visit with the dogs on my way.

    I felt quilty for a long time not walking my dog, but I know overall he has a good home with us. We give him lots of attention and we play with him alot too.
  11. MsE

    MsE New Member

    Just this past week I found a teen-ager who is going to help me with yard work and cleaning a couple of sheds. He is a possibility for dog walks on the days I can't make it. I'll see if the enlarged play area helps (that will be finished next weekend) and if it doesn't, I may talk to him about doggy walks. At least some of the time.
  12. MsE

    MsE New Member

    Ody is very good about not doing his business in the house. It is just that he doesn't want to mess up his own section of the back yard. I think he had been an apartment dog before he started running the streets in town and was eventually given to the Humane Society. He was used to waiting until he was taken for a walk, and since he is approximately three-years-old, that was drilled into him.

    He hadn't been microchipped or neutered. Was a wild child in some ways, but I hadn't known quite what a wild child he was. Now he is having to learn new rules. Fortunately he is very smart. However, he is also very stubborn. I am just hoping that having a larger penned area will get him over his fastidiousness regarding pottying in his own place even if he isn't walked. Let's hope.

    I think I'm going to start carrying my cell phone with me when I do walk him, however, as there are times I feel quite out of breath. That good old CFIDS!!!
  13. joanierav

    joanierav Member

    ok now my brain fog is clearer. and your story is clearer to me. your brother and sister dying is heavy duty exhaustion/weakness = relapse please accept my deep sincere condolences. ((mse))

    this is the important part , for me anyway. all my relapses are different. some are very very severe. and those are the ones that bring on the uncontrollable crying jags. some of my relapses, when i overdo, etc they are not as severe as losing a loved one, divorce , loss of a job. some of the minor relapses , i can sometimes get over in one or two wks. but the severe ones, last for much longer. months, years. etc.

    let me tell you for me , the long periods of lack of sleep , will bring on the tears, quicker than anything. please try to get as good as sleep as you can. my thoughts and prayers are with you.

    youve got good advice about the dog walker , and you enlarging the pen. lets keep fingers crossed.

    love, joanierav
  14. MsE

    MsE New Member

    Thank you, joanierav, and everyone, for answering my post. This afternoon I'm so exhausted I feel as though I'm one step from death. Yup. An exaggeration. It's because I took the dog for a walk. Shouldn't have done that. Really shouldn't have done that! I get so short of breath and wobbly.

    Oh well. I made it. Now I'm going to crash on the sofa and watch TV and that's it for the day. I hate these sensations because I always start wondering if my heart is going out on me. Yup. I've had it checked. It's all CFIDS. Soooo tired. No more messages from me today. Thank you again, all of you! MsE
  15. MsE

    MsE New Member

    I answered generally to all of the posts, but I didn't mention that yes, I did trying the old trick of moving the dog's BM to the proper spot. In fact, did it several times as per advice I had read on a Shih Tzu doggy site. How did Ody respond? He thought I was nuts! Didn't do a bit of good. :-(