The economy... so bad, that:

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by victoria, Jan 27, 2010.

  1. victoria

    victoria New Member

    I don't know what late night TV show this came from:

    The economy is SO bad that ...

    -I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

    -I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the kid behind the counter asked,
    "Can you afford fries with that?"

    -CEO's are now playing miniature golf.

    -If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds,"
    you call them and ask if they meant YOU or THEM.

    -Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.

    -McDonald's is selling the "1/4 ouncer".

    -Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.

    -A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
    (No wonder I'm seeing more around here.... lolol)

    -Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.

    -Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.

    -The Mafia is laying off judges.

    -Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

    -Congress says they are looking into the Bernie Madoff scandal.
    Oh GREAT!!
    The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by
    the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!

    And, finally...

    -I was so depressed last night thinking about the
    economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security,
    retirement funds, etc...................
    I called the Suicide Lifeline.

    I got a call center in Pakistan. When I told them I was suicidal,
    they got all excited, and asked if I knew how to drive a truck.

  2. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Once again we see that in this life, tragedy and comedy are intertwined.
    I think it was on the Letterman show someone said, If the economy gets
    any worse, people will start calling the l930s the Good Old Days.

  3. butterflydream

    butterflydream New Member

    for the laugh. The economy is a mess, the laugh was well needed.
  4. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    economy is so bad the City of San Diego is laying off one-third of its
    police dogs.

    Sounds like a joke, but it's in the news today. All of the police
    horses are being sold too.

  5. victoria

    victoria New Member

    Georgia, that's too funny.... maybe we should relax the rule of no beans in our house, LOL!

    and Rock, that is sad... sure hope they all get good homes. I'm betting the dog handlers get to keep them, at least I hope so.

    The economy's so bad that the President has a great new economic plan:
    He's going to make all the cabinet members that he has selected pay their back taxes.

    The economy's so bad,
    a picture is now only worth 200 words.

    The economy's so bad,
    Donald Trump fired himself.

    "Economics is the only field in which two people can get a Nobel Prize for saying exactly the opposite thing." (ain't that the truth!)

    The economy's so bad,
    the highest-paying job in town is jury duty.

  6. rocky76

    rocky76 Member

  7. sisland

    sisland New Member

    Thanks Victoria and all for the lolol!
  8. JimB51

    JimB51 Member

    I finally "got" the Pakistan truck driving job. ( a new prospect for a suicide bomber truck driving job) Ha!
  9. karinaxx

    karinaxx New Member

    we all laugh tears.
    Thanks so much
  10. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    The game of Monopoly was invented during the Great Depression.
    In our current depression, Parker Brothers has marked the price of
    houses down 40%.

    Elton John has pawned his glasses. Jay Leno has pawned
    his motorcycles. Donald Trump has pawned 2 skyscrapers
    and a bale of bad wigs.

    The CEO of Starbucks was seen buying coffee at McDonalds.

    Rodeo Drive is now known as Tobacco Road.

    To save on labor costs, manufacturers are now selling jeans
    with holes in them without the holes. You have to make your own.

    And finally, the economy is so bad that people are reduced to
    telling bad economy jokes.

  11. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Call me Cassandra.

    Parker Brothers HAS changed Monopoly. I think it's because of
    the 75th anniversary.

    Anyhoo, the new game board is round. There's no paper money. Just
    an ATM. And when you pass go, you collect $2,000,000!

    I still remember the first game of Monoploy I played. Over 60 years ago.

    I wonder how much the first set cost. A buck? In those days you could buy
    a meal or a movie ticket for 35 cents. A new Chevy cost around $1600. A new
    Cadillac about $5000. An house: $5,000 to $10,000. A Hollywood mansion:
    $25,000 to $30,000.

    Of course, the other side of the coin is that there weren't many coins around.

    I get the race car.