"The Secret"

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by shari1677, Apr 24, 2009.

  1. shari1677

    shari1677 New Member

    Has anyone here seen the DVD "The Secret" or read the book "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne? I am reading the book. It has made a significant difference in my life in just a short week.

    I borrowed it from the library, but, I love it so much I will buy it. I don't remember the last time I actually bought a book.
  2. outofstep

    outofstep Member

    very funny, and who knew that you could make a shiv out of a toothrush?
  3. TigerLilea

    TigerLilea Active Member

    I have both the book and the DVD. While I do believe in the "Law of Attraction", I thought there were some flaws with "The Secret". Several of the people who contributed to the DVD were upset that Rhonda Byrnes over-edited their taped pieces and in some cases totally changed the meanings of their messages.

    James Arthur Ray and Michael Beckwith were two people who complained about the finished product. They both state that it isn't as simple as wishing for something, and poof, you will have it. You must allign yourself towards making a goal happen. For instance, if you want the dream house, you have to do more than make a vision board. You have to have a source of income (ie a job) that will make purchasing the house possible, and being able to maintain the house once you've purchase it. If you want to win big on the lottery, you have to be investing in lottery tickets. If you want to enjoy good health and have an athletic looking body, you have to do more than visualize it. Sitting on your butt, eating ding-dongs, watching TV all day is not going to make you a healthy person.

    I do believe that if you are always negative, aren't open to possibilites, then yes, you do set yourself up for disappointment and failure. However, I found it very disturbing the notion that anyone who gets sick brought it upon themselves by their wrong thinking. That if a woman is raped in her home, she brought this on herself?? If you get hit by a drunk driver, you are somehow responsible because of your thinking?? This to me is absolute nonsense.

    Rhonda Byrnes had mentioned that "The Secret" was the first in a series of books that she planned on doing, however, I don't recall ever hearing of anymore books coming out.

  4. TigerLilea

    TigerLilea Active Member

    >>>But its not a straight line. The missing variable is action. You have to act in order for those things to happen."<<<

    That was the problem with "The Secret". Several of the people who contributed to the DVD were upset that their messages were edited to fit the authors point of view, thereby giving a very unrealistic sense of what the law of attraction is about.
  5. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the site, Broadcasting. This teaches us the value of good oral
    hygiene. Always keep your toothbrush handy.

    The topic of "The Secret" comes up every few months. Maybe the name of
    the book should be changed. Can it still be a secret if millions of copies have
    been sold?

    Anyway, we always have a couple people who think it's wonderful, and several
    posters who think it's nonsense. No doubt the issue will still be debated after
    most of us are gone.


  6. gapsych

    gapsych New Member

    So if we are ill, poor, have had misfortunes, we have caused it by our thoughts.

    Thanks but no thanks.

    Yeah, positive thinking may give you a boost or be motivational but it is not going to guarantee that you will get everything you want.

    Such is life!!

    [This Message was Edited on 04/25/2009]
  7. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    I only watched the beginning of the DVD so can't comment much on that specifically but...

    I wholeheartedly believe in the Laws of Attraction, positive thinking and positive attitude. I know it has changed my life.
    That does NOT mean that misfortune and other terrible, tragic things won't happen in your life.
    Life is made up of those things.

    I believe you do get back what you put out there. When you think of what you want in life (wishful thinking), you have to be broad in your thinking. Sort of like praying (if you pray) -
    I don't wish for 100,000 dollars, I wish for enough to support my family for example. If you wish for success....that changes throughout your life. For me, that would be being a wonderful Mom. -
    I believe that having positive thinking LEADS you to make decisions and take steps to get you to where you want to go - almost subconsciously. It's a process.

    There's also a trust that comes with it. You learn to trust yourself and almost know that you're gonna be okay. This is VERY hard to explain.

    There will always be set backs, challenges, hard times - that's when you're tested. As I said, life isn't a rosy journey with a few rough patches. Life is full of rough patches, that's why you hang onto and cherish the happy moments - and seek them out.

    Positive thinking in and of itself does not give you 'things'. It directs you.
    I have two boys. If one said "I'll never find a job" and the other said "it's gonna be tough, but I'm going to find a job" - I bet I know which one will get a job.

    I'm know I'm getting a bit off topic, but it hurts me so when I hear people say "I'll never be anything, have anything....." Nope, they wont. Not with that attitude or thinking because it will stifle their movement.

    Whew...sorry that was a long thought. =)
  8. bigmama2

    bigmama2 New Member

    broadcasting-- that was sooo funny!!!! i loved it!

    aboout the secret- i agree with kamina, and gap, and somewhat with tigerlilea.


    positive thinking and positive actions are very good/important/helpful/necessary for us.

    however the "blame the victim" mentality of "the secret" is atrocious!!!! i was sexually abused by a neighbor when i was 13. so according to the secret- i attracted that. right.

    at age 20, i was held at gunpoint in an armed robbery by violent gang members at a jewelery store where i worked. i had PTSD for a year or so afterwards. so, that was quite a bit of fun. i am so glad i attracted that whole mess to myself. really, it was great!!! i recommend it.



    [This Message was Edited on 04/25/2009]
  9. greatgran

    greatgran Member

    Bought the book after hearing so much about it from the Oprah Show. I didn't like it. Yes, I am all for thinking good thoughts etc. but bad things happen no matter what. I thought the book was too deep for me to go there and I didn't care for it. I am glad it has helped some as we are all different.

    God Bless,
  10. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    In no way do I believe that terrible things that happen to us (beyond our control )are caused by "sending a message out there". I never got that from what I read about the Secret. Maybe I missed that.
    We can't control what others do to us, nor can we control what ailments we get or if a tornado is going to wipe out of town.
    We can only control our own attitudes and thoughts.

    You can't change your feelings, however you can change your thoughts - which are what determines your feelings about things.

    If there is one thing that I've told my kids since an early age it's that they can do anything, be anything, deal with anything. Their thoughts will determine how they get through it.
    It makes a huge difference in self-esteem.
    I was a miserable teenager - kind of let my life be guided by the direction of the wind.

    At 20 I moved and vowed I would change myself. Believe me, I've faced many obstacles, challenges etc. but if you deal with it in a certain way, it is much easier to get through.
    I would never have hung around the same people that I did as a younger age. They were absolutely no good for me - but I had a sense of belonging - what many of our children get caught up in today.

    I "attracted" a different group of people because of what I believed in myself. Now it's natural and it doesn't take any effort. Don't get me wrong, I try to see good in everyone. I don't want to come across any other way.

    If "the Secret" or anything else, says you are to blame if something horrible has happened to you, I agree that is absolutely ridiculous - absolutely absurd.
    I am saddened to hear some of the things that some of you have endured. My gosh, my heart goes out to you. You are obviously SURVIVORS!!

    Now...when I go through the death of my parents or anyone else like that....I'm gonna come back here and hope you'll all help me through it. It's the thing I dread the most.

    Rainbow...you do feel "wealthy" when you have a healthy state of mind. I think you're incredibly grateful for simple things - at least thats how I feel.

    (why do I always post these long things!)

    I hope everyone has a wonderful day!
  11. TigerLilea

    TigerLilea Active Member

    >>>I've told my kids since an early age it's that they can do anything, be anything, deal with anything.<<<

    I think this is what a lot of parents and adults tell kids today, and personally I think it is a mistake. You CAN'T "do anything and be anything" just because someone has told you all of your life that you can. Not everyone has the gift to be a great painter, musician, or swimmer. Telling a girl that comes from a family that lean towards being short and over-weight, that she can be a super model when she grows up is absurd. Not everyone has the smarts to be a brain surgeon. You have to be born into the family to be the Queen of England. A boy who dreams of being a professional basketball player doesn't stand much of a chance if he only grows to be 5' 6".

    I totally understand that we want to build a child's self-esteem, however, there also has to be a measure of truth in what we teach kids. Teaching them that they can have it all isn't realistic, because at the end of the day, they can't have it all.

    Just my 2 cents worth :)
  12. TigerLilea

    TigerLilea Active Member

    A lot of people have the mistaken belief that The Secret/Law of Attraction is all about positive thinking. It has nothing to do with positive thinking. You can think as positively as you want, however, if you aren't living a positive lifestyle, then nothing is going to change.

    The LOA teaches us that what we think about is what we will manifest. If you are always negative, you will attract more negativity into your life. If you always think of yourself as financially poor, you will tend to stay poor. If you think of yourself as having enough, you are more likely to attain more. If you see yourself as always fat, you will not lose weight. If you see yourself as healthy, getting healthier all the time, then you will tend to live a lifestyle that will support that view.

    As far as CFS goes, if you see yourself as having an illness that has no chance of getting cured, then you will probably live a lifestyle to support that belief. If on the other hand, you have the belief that CFS, if maybe not 100% curable, can at least get symptom relief, then you will live a lifestyle that will support that belief. That is living the "Law of Attraction" or "The Secret".

  13. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    I have also read and watched other sources about how our thinking affects our lives. Nothing in any of these sources blames the victim for what he or she has suffered in life. It isn't about that. It isn't about always thinking positive thoughts and nothing bad will happen. That is a distorted explanation of the message.

    If one has a basic grasp of quantum physics, and how human observation changes the outcome of experiments, it can help one to see the possibility that our thoughts can affect the world around us and our lives. The experiment of photographs of water molecules, as seen in the DVD, "What The BLEEP Do We Know?" is strong evidence of just how much our thoughts can affect the world.

    In a practical sense, it just makes sense to try to see the good in everything. Yes, there are times we have to turn toxic people or situations away in order to survive, but in doing that, there is always a silver lining. The trick is to remain open to seeing the good which comes out of most everything.

    In my work with the public, I see all kinds of people with all kinds of attitudes. Those who have lived long and survived many hard times are some of the most centered and peaceful people I know. Most of them look for the good and learn positive lessons from their ordeals.

    One of the best lessons I have received came from a funny little Tim Allen movie, "The Santa Clause." He said, "Seeing isn't believing; believing is seeing."

    Each day, I thank God for the enlightenment, healing, love, and abundance I enjoy in my life. I tell Him I am eternally thankful and very excited because I know what I have asked for, or something even better, is on the way. It sure beats facing each day thinking about my problems. Each day, I also ask God that I may be a blessing in someone else's life, even a very small blessing.

    People can be very afraid of positive messages. If they dare to try to think positive thoughts and something bad happens, they fear "failure," or worse, that they are to blame for their own problems. In reality, we have to accept that we can't control everything. All we can control is how we react to events and interact with others. Some of the most miserable people live fear-based lives.

    When we accept that we are in control of how we react to life, it empowers us, even in the worst of times.

    Love, Mikie
  14. Sacajawea2

    Sacajawea2 Member

    your words are so beautiful...I will especially keep in mind that last line as I go through some of my "worst of times right now"...it's hard to see it all the time when one is in the middle but there is enough support to keep pulling me out of my fears...and for that I still manage to find joy and feel blessed. Life is still good!

  15. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    Sorry, I totally disagree. Kids learn their own limitations.

    You don't need to tell me about being realistic - my children actually have a 'limitation', but my point is that I've taught them not to let it get in the way of how they live their lives. Maybe my statement was taken too literally. There are certain things my kids won't be able to do, but I don't have to tell them that, they know it themselves. The point is to never let your own negative thinking be your biggest obstacle - the "I can't do it".

    If my son was short and wanted to be a basketball player, I would, for example, lead him to another sport that he could excel in and have a better chance as opposed to saying 'oh forget it'.

    Please don't misunderstand my point. I've seen way too much negative thinking and ways of living and I find it quite sad.
  16. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    You so beautiful articulated everything I was trying to say!
  17. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    For the feedback. I really appreciate it. It has taken me a lifetime to get to the point where I feel empowered and unafraid of what life may bring. It is only in retrospect that I can see the good side of some heartbreaking events. The sources I cited, and many others, have been a huge help in my ongoing journey toward enlightenment. Traditional therapy has helped as well. I try to take learning from many different sources and apply them to my journey. BTW, I'm just learning that life is about the journey itself and not some big outcome.

    Again, thank you to everyone who so kindly responded to my response. It is my hope that everyone will be open to finding the path to empowerment and enlightenment. It is also my hope that we all find peace and healing along the way.

    Love, Mikie
  18. equanimous

    equanimous New Member

    Not to be rude, but I think it would be a stretch to categorize "The Secret" as a book. It's all pictures, fluff and nonsense. Not to mention the fact that it just repackages an idea that has been around for ages. I think you'd be getting something closer to a "book" by thumbing through People magazine in line at the grocery store. This is just my two cents. I hate to admit that I ever even opened "The Secret," but I was working at a bookstore when it came out, so I had to be informed enough to warn my customers about it.

    All that being said, if you find it to be helpful, that's great. I'm a big fan of self-fulfilling prophecy and the placebo effect. Just my two cents.

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