Therapist- need suggestions (Sorry~~Long!)

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by FM58, Oct 14, 2005.

  1. FM58

    FM58 New Member

    I finally found a therapist on my own - since my PCP clearly did NOT want to help me with this issue.

    Now this therapist has told me she understands & believes in fibro/CFIDS, has other patients w/ fibro and others w/ chronic pain issues.

    She initially was pushing me to look into the Mayo Clinic's & recommended a particular book that was published in 1987. It was actually by a doc that ran the Scripps Pain Clinic-but this is the same philosophy as Mayo.

    I read the book- it was awful!! I brought it w/ me to my next appt & told her so. Told her it had dated information & I did NOT agree w/ the philosophy- told her it was very one sided, never even mentioned Fibro, IC or CFIDS(Did the doc even believe in Fibro?!?)I explained this philosophy on pain management is not for me. She could read the book, if she wanted.~~~~~~She backed way off and took me for what I said- she said- OK, if you say this method is not for you, I believe you. She just didn't understand why it was on this recommended reading list she had(?)

    Alright, things were going well. I gave her Devin Starlanyl's "What Your Mental Health Provider Needs to Know" & "What Everyone on Your Health Team Needs to Know" - she read them & thanked me for providing them to her. She admitted she did not understand all of it. OK, now this week - she wants me to COLOR!!! To use as a meditating, relaxing devise. She even gave me the name of an adult coloring book, they have small, complicated pictures- Mandala's Coloring Book (anybody ever use these?)

    I reminded her that I have problems with my hands. I can't even write for very long without being uncomfortable! My hands get really shakey, it's embarrassing~I usually try to hide it.

    So she went on- well then don't color for too long. If you feel like you are going out of the lines, it's making your frustrated- then stop. Well, I can't be bothered to color at all- I know it is NOT going to be meditating or relaxing for me, just annoying & painful- ugh! I need to get this point accross to her again-gggggrrrrr!

    I was soooooo annoyed! However, I brought to this appointment a book a friend lent me. "The Chronic Illness Workbook~Strategies and Solutions for Taking Back Your Life" by Patricia Fennell, MSW, CSW-R My therapist was thrilled w/ this book! She thumbed through it & was delighted- she said - oh this is exactly what we are trying to do!! Right now this book is out of print, however the author is currently working on a second edition.

    So, it looks like my therapist is open to information I bring her~but I'm not sure she "get's it". On previous visits, she has tried to have me register with Vocational Rehab & work. I explained (again & AGAIN!) I can NOT work at all- because I am still waiting for a hearing before a judge for my SSD. I have to prove that I am unable to work at all, I really had to get adamant with her on this point! Besides the fact that my body truly is unable to work, really.

    We have had some good sessions - but then she comes up with some of the above mentioned situations. I am at a loss. I feel like I am educationg her-geez!

    It was soooo difficult just finding a therapist at all, in the first place. I had NO help from my PCP!! I did not like the man my fibro doc sent me to. I just could not hunt on my own again, it is waaaay too frustrating. $$$ is sooooo tight, I am almost tempted to give it all up & request counseling from my Church. Hey, I could just provide a Church counselor with the same info I did my therapist.

    Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much!

    Gentle Hugs,
    Patty
    [This Message was Edited on 10/14/2005]
  2. LollieBoo

    LollieBoo New Member

    She really listens, and yet really doesn't!

    I have seen the mandala coloring books... they are neat, supposed to help create a calm, centered focus. BUT not if it hurts and causes stress! My therapist sent me home to "draw my illness". I did it, but got nothing new out of it. Maybe it just helped her understand.

    Anyway, she sounds like she's trying. Maybe if you were more direct (that almost sounds silly with as obviously direct as you have already been!), but tell her what you want from her. What role she is to play in your illness. You know, like, "I need you here to help me establish boundaries for myself or with other people"; statements like that.

    I don't know... my therapist says her daughter has FM, yet everything I tell her is new to her!

    Good Luck. Sorry I don't have any really good advice- but I do relate!

    Lollie
  3. acesk

    acesk New Member

    I have tried several therapist without much luck - finally found a great one - he is in with a pain doctor and has a ph.d. in psychology. He understands fibro and pain and is extremely helpful. So check with the pain clinics around town. Also, my insurance picks it up because is it a pain clinic!

    Sue in Florida
  4. cjsmommy

    cjsmommy New Member

    I have to say that I went to a therapist, initally for PPD, and one of the things that she had me do was draw out (not in a coloring book) how I was feeling and how my nightmares FELT (I suffered from severe nightmares for years). She taught me how to meditate and I can't even begin to tell you how much doing these things helped. I've only had two bad dreams, not even nightmares, in the past 2 years where before I'd have a nightmare almost nightly.

    Having said that, the therapist seems open to learning but doesn't sound like she's really understanding what you're saying. Discuss it with her. Put it out there..you have to establish a good "working" relationship with your therapist in order to get the most out of it. Don't give up on it just yet...but you may need to find someone else. You'll know when you've found the right therapist because it will feel right.

    ((HUGS)))
  5. LittleBluestem

    LittleBluestem New Member

    When I was in college, my church's student center had coloring books and crayons for us during finals week. The Sunday night student fellowship was a coloring session and the materials were available for use anytime during the rest of the week. We thought it was neat.

    The coloring books were the kind with large, simple pictures of animals, flowers and such that are meant for very young children. The crayons may have been the big fat ones, too, I don't remember for sure. There are now large square crayons that are easier for small children, or anyone with difficulty with their hands, to hold. If you are not totally opposed to coloring, you might give large crayons and simple pictures a try.