Tigger Update

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Tigger57, Nov 17, 2005.

  1. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    I don't know where to begin...

    I'm still in a lot of pain and I can't tell if it is fibro flare or car accident (probably a combination of both).

    I'm having a very difficult time I got my check for last week and I didn't even get paid for the holiday (because I was out sick anyway). My check was a whopping $116 and change. I wanted to cry right then and there. My previous check, with overtime, was less than I was getting on unemployment.

    The way things are going, I figure I'm losing money by going to work. If I wasn't so dead inside, I might cry. It is just awful. I'm serious about losing the money... between the cost of gas, the new clothes I had to get, what it is going to cost to get my car fixed. I have a $500 deductible and I believe they are going to say it was my fault. I'm in constant pain too, but I don't want anyone to know about the fibro.

    Now my dog Eddy has a growth on his eyelid that the vet feels should be removed, but it will cost between $300 and $500... and I don't have it. I'm not sure we will even be able to pay the mortgage.

    It's one thing to not be able to afford things because you aren't working, but it's a real low blow when you are working and fighting horrible traffic to go to a job that you hate, to get paid a pittance.

    If it sounds like I've slid into a depression, I have. I just don't know what to do at this point. I keep sending out resumes. The other thing is working at the "executive search firm" that I'm working for, it kills me to hear that they found a job for someone working $80k a year and their qualifications aren't much different than mine... but even though I've been an Office Manager for 30 years, have my Associate's degree and my Bechelor's degree in Business Administration/Business Management... I'm only worth $12 an hour. I understand for some that seems good, but since I am working for this firm, I have access to certain things to find out what I should get... lets just say that $12 was on the WAY low end (actually, it didn't exist).

    I'm babbling. Sorry, but I hurt physically, mentally and emotionally right now so much. I have no idea what to do other than keep sending out resumes.

    Thank you all who have been so kind through this horrible year (or two). I truly hope and pray that black cloud over me just goes away soon.
  2. lovethesun

    lovethesun New Member

    Hugs Linda
  3. MamaR

    MamaR New Member

    I was on earlier and posted a message to you just after you posted it. I don't know where it went! I don't think that i said anything for it to be deleted. It was only concern. I possibly hit wrong key....it has been a long night.

    Anyway, I will try again. I was just saying how sad that I am that you have gone through so much for so long. I know that the job situation is just awful, and then the pain that is always there. I just wanted you to know that I care and hope that things turn around soon!

    With Love...Mari
  4. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    Here I am sitting on the couch, procrastinating going to work. I know I have to, and I know that I have to be on time, but I'm sure glad it's Friday.

    I'm going to try to use this weekend to get myself together and send out a bunch more letters.

    Thanks again.
  5. Rosiebud

    Rosiebud New Member

    You were so excited about your job.

    People forget that it costs to work and you need to get a decent salary to cover those costs and give you a decent standard of living.

    Would you not be as well claiming disability?? I'm not sure of the process in the States or what you would get paid but if you are in such pain then maybe you shouldnt be working at all.

    I hope something else comes up for you soon.

  6. fivesue

    fivesue New Member

    I'm so sad because of all these troubles. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

  7. chopindog

    chopindog New Member

    Just a hug, to let you know I am thinking of you and am so sorry things are so hard for you right now! Joy
  8. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    I may have deleted you message. I hit the post button before I had finished. So, it may have been me.

    It has been a very difficult 2 years, but still I keep plugging along. That must account for something, doesn't it?

  9. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    I have been reading some of your posts and the similarities scare me sometimes.

    We've got to find a way to work this out. I don't know about you, but I don't have any choice other than to work and just keep going forward (even though it feels like backwards most days.
  10. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    I'm dealing with the pain to teh best of my ability, but right now it's the job. I should not be working as a receptionist, for one thing (they called it Administrative Assistant-- they don't have a clue). And the fact that I'm working 40 hours a week and making less than when I'm on unemployment.

    Something is wrong withi system

  11. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    Yes, I do have to work. There is no way I can live on what I would get on SSD. I would be homeless.

    I'm working as an "Admnistrative Assistant"... the job is actually that of a receptionist. It kills me that people put a good name on something and then make it lesser than it is.

    I send out resumes every day and just keep praying. Thanks for the support.
  12. darude

    darude New Member

    My heart goes out to you!!!!!! With all your problems you would probably get disability even thos its a fight. At least apply and see what happens.

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