Too much stress......is making me............

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Cinlou, Apr 22, 2007.

  1. Cinlou

    Cinlou New Member

    feel unbalanced.........this is going to be a rant....but it will help me to release some anger and emotions.

    I believe all the stress in my life has caused alot of my FM symptoms. At eight years of age I was sexualy abused by a stepfather.....At that time he was my mother's boyfriend.....she was having an affair with him while being married to my father............

    I won't go into detail but, this has made me a very tense person.........the fear of this man, the anger at my mother for doing that to my father.....her not being aware of what this man was doing to me. (She did not know, and never will)

    I left home right out of high school to be with a man that was thirteen years older. He had three children, one being only eight years younger than me.( This was very stressful)
    We were together for 13 years and he became sick while I was pregnant with our son......long story short the many trips to the hospital for OB appointments, visiting hubby in hospital, stress, stress stress...

    Had a newborn to take care of, a hubby that I had to give IVs at home every four hours, day and night. Also catheter directly to his heart had to be changed.

    He died when my son was only 9 months old, very sad, stressful.....

    I was in an auto accident and had whiplash....which I am sure caused alot of the Degenerative Disc Disease in my spine and did not help the FM issues of to come....

    I remarried a man three years younger than me...........he had never been married..........at that time I had tied my tubes before I met him...........so we got married and had surgery to retie, ( Have a beautiful 18 year old daughter as a result)

    Well, this husband has an alcohol problem and I filed for divorce last September (married 18 years)..........during the year before all this happened my mom came down with brain cancer..............she passed away February 4th...

    Yesterday morning 4:00am my soon to be X called collect, he just got out of jail, he was in an accident in his new truck, he had been drinking (of course)and got a DUI which is his second. A family in a van hit him as he was making an illegal U-turn. Thank God no one was hurt or killed! Two babies in car seats were in the van. It just makes me sick.

    He is a firefighter at a good job with the government, he drives the engine............I am sick..... We don't know if he will lose his job. I work but I do not make much money....how will I keep my house? Alimony pays my house payment.....

    X tells me he will never drink again, I heard this before, it did not happen...........

    I pray he stops, this is such a wake up call for him......my heart aches for him...........addiction is such a horrible thing............................

    He is really not a bad man, but this problem has caused heartache to his family...................My son is now 21 and my daughter is 18..........I just turned 53. I am so ready for a new life that is filled with happiness........ I do go to therapy for this issues in my life........I am going to heal.............mind, body and soul.........thanks for reading if you did.

    Cindy







  2. LadyC

    LadyC New Member

    Cinlou your life has indeed been filled with lots of pain and stresses. The good thing is that you have survived. That says a lot about who you are. You will make it through this also. Try to stay encouraged and remember that the same strength you found to get you through the abuse, bad marriage, and everything else you have endured, will get you through this time also. I will remember you in prayer.
  3. Cinlou

    Cinlou New Member

    Prickles and Ladyc,
    Thank you for your replies.... they were very kind. We are all survivers of some sort. Bless you..........
    Cindy
  4. Ginner

    Ginner New Member

    I am thinking of you.
    Please take care of yourself first and all else will fall into place, you know that!
    Tomorrow is a new day..all we can do is do the best we can !

    Ginner