Tormented mind in fibro?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by mrpain, May 25, 2006.

  1. mrpain

    mrpain New Member

    I notice for myself that there are times when I'm just real fatigued and hurting all over but my mind can be crystal clear. But some days, or even weeks, my mind will go into a deep dark hole where not only does brainfog enter the picture, but my mind will feel like it's in torment.

    I loose all perspective of things and become very unsocialble...It's those times I'm better off being in a room by myself so I won't get irritated or be an irritation to others. In those times I can't even explain to the ones I love why I don't want to talk.

    I'm not sure what causes it but it is completely different from a physical flare to have that mental part added to the mixture. And yes, depression usely accompanies those times but it is pure evil...A terrible feeling that words can't describe. But one day down the road, the mind clears up and will just leave the fatigue and pain.

    Of course the cycle will cause it to return and here we go again. Physical flares seem different to me but just as bad. And of course whether in a flare or not, there's always the presents of pain & fatigue with ibs and brainfog and sensory overload.. Have you ever experieced anything close to this??
    [This Message was Edited on 05/30/2006]
  2. jenni4736

    jenni4736 New Member

    I never thought of it that way before...but you are right. I find that the mental rounds are the worst. Pure evil...you are right!

    The sensory overload comes with this time for me...which is what makes it so overwhelming. I want to be alone in the quiet with my eye mask on blocking out ALL light. I walk around like that for days when it is the worst!

    When the senses calm down I get some mental clearing and I become mentally stronger and can handle everything (including the pain) better. That is a good day!

    I wish you loads of Great Days!

    jenni



  3. mwduffey

    mwduffey New Member

    I have always put this with BI Polar,

    But from what i am reading and how you expain it, it makes more sense to me. I am not crazy and it is real.

    I have tried for years to figure out what is causeing the depression when it would wash over me.

    I needed this one today.

  4. greatgran

    greatgran Member

    Gee, never thought of it this way but YES, this happens to me so often .Oh, how true the mental is so much worse than the physical flares...

    Its so hard to describe the horrible head feeling.. What is it and what causes it..Just to have the mind feel clear means a good day for me, no matter how I feel physically..

    Someone told me it was the xanax that I take that caused the crazy feeling but if it wasn't for the xanax I would probably me in the mental ward..

    Thanks for your post, I actually thought I was the only one with this...

    God Bless,
    greatgran
  5. carebelle

    carebelle New Member

    My first really bad experience was with the mental .I had dealt with the physical for so long I had gotten use to it. When I had my mental breakdown it caused my physical pain to get worse.Over time my mental has been getting back to normal, but now the physical pain gets unbearable at times.
    When I was in the breakdown I couldn't be with people very long I got to nervous needed a lot of just quite time by myself. Ever since then, I seem to want and need more alone time ,then I ever have.One is not worse, then the other ,its the build up of stress on either or both that causes us to retreat from even our loved ones.It's no ones fault, explain to them it's a defect in our body's and mind.

  6. LittleBluestem

    LittleBluestem New Member

    My physical and mental condition go up and down together. That is why I figured I must have a problem with my mitochondrial energy production cycle long before I figured out that I had CFS.
  7. mrpain

    mrpain New Member

    How ya doing tonight? A mental flare to me is about ten times worse than brainfog even though that is present also. It's when you are mentally in agony, and feel like your in a deep dark hole with no escape. It's pure evil and you don't want to be around anyone..

    I've just recently came out of one, and during that time, I mostly stayed in the back bedroom and watch television by myself. Normally I'm a fun loving dad and husband, who likes to be with his family and is always kidding around. Even when I'm hurting and tired, which is most of the time..

    But these mental flares, which sometimes go hand in hand with the physical flares, is just more than I can take. And it's hard to describe and put into words. Only people who go thru them, will understand it. You can't think, your depressed, your very unsocialble, and your personality changes.

    This is my feeble attempt to try to explain a very complicated matter.. That's why I was wondering if anyone else went thru this or am I on my own?
  8. mrpain

    mrpain New Member

    I don't even know how I get into them, much less, get out of them.... I just try to get out of everybody's way so I can get thru it. My wife somewhat understands because I've been able to talk to her when I'm not in that funk...

    What helps her to understand is that her dad is going thru the same thing as I am, only minus the pain. That's our only difference.. He also has sleep apnea like I do also...
  9. diva42597

    diva42597 New Member

    I get the same cycles...and you are right the mental flares for me are worse than the physical sometimes. I can deal with pain. I can take medication and put icy hot patches on (those are the best by the way!!!) etc., but the mental ones are truly dreadful. One way I've been able to regulate them is through physical activity. I know not all of us are in a position where we are physically able to exercise regularly, but I make it a point to do something to get my heart rate up every day. This does help with the pain and the violent mood swings. If I even miss one day, I get lower than low. This has actually been confirmed by my doctor. I had noticed the pattern and I asked him if it was the exercise that helped and he said that one of the few things that helps regulate the chemical imbalances that fibro sufferers experience is cardiovascular exercise. So, I figured I'd share. Just be aware that if you are starting an exercise regimen you will experience increased pain for about a week and then symptoms will decrease as long as you continue the regimen regularly.

    Kristen
  10. mrpain

    mrpain New Member

    Exercise is something we all need for sure, but it sure is hard to find the motivation and energy. What kind of exercise do you do and how do you motivate yourself. Also, when your real exhausted, how do you overcome that in order to exercise? Thanks for the response!
  11. lenasvn

    lenasvn New Member

    Maybe an excercise bike, stationary will cut it. Promise yourself to ride it as long as the news cast is on, for example.

    Or make a routine out of evening walks with or without the family. Anything that gets your heart pump faster will get the job done to balance your system.

    I have those awful things hitting me too, it frustrated me so (since I am a single parent and can't hide, I always have to be in shape for my children,,,piew!) I had to ask my psychiatrist (treating my PTSD) if he thought I had any other screws loose, and he giggled and said-" don't worry, you are not insane, there is nothing wrong with you!".

    Anywho, after my vehicle was totaled from a "hit-and-run" while parked outside my house I was forced to walk alot. It was physically demanding, and if I've had a car I know I would had abandoned the walking right off the bat, I was hurting, and my legs wouldn't move!

    But as I continued, my body didn't really improve more than a millimeter, but my mental balance did. It was a pleasant surprise. (I bet, especially for my children,,,arf!)

    Just my 2 cents, I really do need a pot of coffee now,,,LOL!
  12. diva42597

    diva42597 New Member

    My biggest motivation personally is that I am young and I have a mother suffering with fibro also. She is in much worse shape than I am physically. She is in her fifties and is mobile, but barely. She handles it better than anyone I know, but it set on at a later age and it took longer for her to get a reliable diagnosis. In my case, my doctor told be because I'm only 28, I can circumvent many of the nasty effects with regular exercise. It is VERY difficult to motivate myself on the bad days. But I find it easier when I think of the struggles my mom has and that it might be possible to avert them...or stall them for a while. The other motivation is that I go through violent mood swings and severe depression because of the disease. Since I have no medical insurance and don't like to rely on medication anyway, I can't take anything prescription to help me. The best non-medicine I've found is exercise.

    As far as the type of exercises...I am not a doctor. I know what works for me. I'm going to seperate by good an bad days. Most of what I've found is by trial and error. Good Days...elliptical, roller blading (on a smooth surface..this is key...bumpy surfaces trigger episodes for me), light aerobics, tredmill, stationary bike, weights, swimming. Bad days...stick to stationary bike, certain weights, and walking on the treadmill. The key for me is to only do as much as my body can handle and to have access to a gym with a sauna. I will exercise until I feel the little twinges of my muscles that tell me it's too much and stop (even if I'm in the middle of an aerobics class...very embarassing, but I know that I need to leave). Then I go directly to the sauna. That normally stops any potential attacks. Also, incorporating weights is a very good idea. I find that weight training twice a week increases my stability and good days. When I'm working out every day I can go for a few weeks without experiencing a bad day. When I slip and don't exercise for a few days or even weeks for whatever reason I experience several bad days a week and have even gone weeks on end without a bad day. Even my mother has begun a senior fitness class and has found her mobility has improved greatly. It's definitely something to try, but you do have to continuously tell yourself that it as important as taking your pills in the morning to managing the disease. For me, I'd rather manage it than have it manage me as many end up doing. Good luck. I hope this helps.

    Kristen
  13. mrpain

    mrpain New Member

    Hey Kristen; It is interesting reading your reply about your mother in her fifties. When I was your age, I started having symptoms of fibro & cfs but had never heard of those names. I played softball and was still very active like you mentioned on your good days.

    On tournament days I would play from 7am in the morning til midnight that night. That was in Tampa fl. where the tournament was being played in the middle of July. We lost our first game which put us in the loser bracket, so we had to keep playing til we lost our second game. We finally lost in the championship that ended at midnight.

    How I made it is beyond my comprehension except I was a lot younger. Now I'm in my fifties like your mother, and getting on the treadmill is a chore although once I'm there, I can do it. You'll see in a couple of decades how your mindset will change.. But I do agree we need to exercise as much as possible..
    [This Message was Edited on 05/28/2006]
  14. Jordane

    Jordane New Member

    I dont think I can have a physical flare without a mental being included.

    Just the exertion of it wears one out,physically and mentally.

    Trying to keep up is almost impossible!!!

    hugzzzz
    Jordane
  15. fibrohugslife

    fibrohugslife New Member

    Mrpain,

    I go through so much of that all of the time. Especially when my pain has hit a very high point and my mind conks out and my body conks out and I go into this zone out process. There are other rimes when I become pretty irritated and maddening and just have the worst attitude. I pretty look like the Exorcist girl and all. I stay away from people when I am that way, because whoever is in my path will get a tongue lashing from me.

    However yes it does go in a vicious cycle and I cannot control it either, it just happens.
  16. kriket

    kriket New Member



    I am so glad that you shared this experience that you were having. I do this a lot. Sometimes, I just don't want to talk to anybody, I just want to be left alone, yet I can't explain it to other people especially when I don't want to talk. Some take it personal, but it's not that at all.


    My mind sometimes just feels like it is dealing with too much and it seems to torture me sometimes. I know exactly what you are trying to explain. I thought I was alone. So sorry for whoever has to experience this, but glad I'm not alone either.

    Kriket

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