Trout has Clout (Per Shelby the cat)

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by TwoCatDoctors, Oct 10, 2011.

  1. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    I forgot to tell you about this. A while ago I fed the cats and went out for an hour and 20 minutes and returned. My place smelled terrible and the smell permeated all throughout my place and I was really worried. I checked the cats and they were okay, nobody had gotten sick or had loose bowels and it wasn't the smell of a natural gas leak that the gas company sends those brochures to remind you of the smell --but I couldn't figure out that horrible smell.

    I began to put myself in the place of a cat and tried to "track the smell by my nose." I finally tracked it to being Shelby cat's food that I had gotten that was being closed out and it was Fancy Feast canned Trout. Now I knew why it was being closed out and was glad I only bought one can.

    I thought it was the worst air DE-freshner ever--but Shelby thought it tasted great, was so wonderful and had that fantastic smell of hanging dead trout in every room and that's just the way cats love it. Shelby wanted to dip a paw in that smelly canned trout and put it behind her ears, on her wrist, on her cleavage and behind her knees, then head out to the nightclub. She knew some cute male cat would come up to her and say "I was going to walk home and spray shrubs along the way, but wow, you smell of dead trout so I'm staying-- would you like a drink of distilled water?"

    As Trout has clout with Shelby, I later saw that Fancy Feast reissued Trout again in what looked like a new can. I got one can and sure enough it is new and is minus that dead trout smell. So if your cat wants to "shout for trout," it's safe and no longer has that smell that permeates your entire place.

  2. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    There once was an old race track tout.
    Who loved to go fishing for trout.
    His cats said, "That's fine.
    We just love to dine."
    On cuisine that we think is tres haute.

  3. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Yes, some of cats' favorite food smells the worst. I found that the smellier the food, the smellier the litter box. It's the "gift" that just keeps on giving. Men love their steaks. I wonder whether I should dab a bit of steak juice behind my ears and go clubbing.

    Love, Mikie
  4. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Cesar says steak juice sounds good to him. Shelby says she has heard the best
    way to attract a human male is to carry a six pack.

    2Cat, I guess if your entertainment center is ever sans power, you can turn to
    your fur babies for fun and gamers.

  5. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Perhaps some steak juice behind one ear and a dab of beer behind the other.

    Love, Mikie
  6. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    Shelby the cat says that the way for a human to get into another human male's heart (without surgery) is giving him the remote controls for the TV and the DVR.

    Cesar said the way for a human to get into another human female's heart is to lightly purr (women seem to like purring), keep your hair or fur clean and smelling good (Cesar has a rocking mane that the human ladies love and kitten shampoo gives his mane that yummy smell that the human ladies can't resist) and don't eat that yucky trout that Shelby likes (yes breath is important and you don't want to bring emergency squads when you have your own personal natural gas leak).

    Ah, the words of love from two feline americans trying to help the world.
  7. paulac7

    paulac7 Member

    I always enjoy reading about your cat 'tales'!! You have such a way with words.....

    What is it about the stinky cat food?? My elderly Siamese gets canned food once in a while as a treat (he's 16, so teeth issues from soft foods are not that big of a deal at his age), but I have noticed, the more 'fragrant' the food, the more he tries to climb my leg to get at it once it's open until I put it in his dish on top of the aquarium. I have to keep his dish 'up' so the dogs don't get at it. But I rarely have to wash his little stainless dish, as when he thinks it requires cleaning, he will swat it onto the floor, as only a Siamese can do!

    Have a great day!!

    Paula >^.^<
  8. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    The stinky food really hits their highly refined sense of smell.

    When my boy Cesar was not feeling well with a cystitis attack a few years ago and he was released from the vet but would not eat, I went into mama mode.

    I took his special canned food and put in some distilled water (to avoid chemicals that might annoy cystisis attack) into it to make it soupy, then nuked it in the microwave to make it nice and warm. That warming increased and brings out the stink (cats think it is a most fabulous smell) and it can help a cat that is sick or has a cold to smell that increased stink and potentially stimulate their appetite to get them to eat. Cesar went for the soupy food like it was the best thing ever.

    It's a two-fold positive with soupy food because not only does the cat get the food in his system, but he also gets water in his system at the same time. So "soupy food" rules around here.
  9. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Found out that Mr. Big only drank filtered or bottled water, he called him the Yuppie Cat. I had to explain the kidney and bladder problem old cats can get. This neighbor never liked cats until he met Mr. Big. Addison would stop by the condo to talk about the assn. and sit on the sofa. Mr. Big would sit next to him. I told him to open his hand on the couch and Mr. Big put his paw in his hand, just like he did with me.

    No one could resist such charm. Mr. Big was a diplomat for cats everywhere.

    Love, Mikie
  10. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Well-Known Member

    about the stinkiest cat food that the kitties just love. MMMMM- nice warm stinking cat foot sounds really something else. I'm sure that Cesar, and Shelby loved it.

    TwoCats, Mikie and Paula 7 =

    Hope the new trout cat food is not as stinkiy but hope that the kitties love stlll love it. I love these cat stories too. I just had to pop in to find out about the stinky trout :)!!.

    [This Message was Edited on 10/11/2011]
  11. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    Granni, yes, nice warm stinking cat food may get your cat to eat and Cesar the cat is stretched across part of the computer keyboard and he said it's so yum [Human Warning: stinking cat food may stink up your kitchen when you warm it, so hold your nose and figure that your cat is so worth it.]

    And it's the truth that "Trout has Clout" and it certainly does with Shelby the cat. I will go further to say that Shelby will "shout for Trout" because she really likes that stuff. But for me, one whiff of her breath after eating and it's like anesthia to me--but cats really love it.

    And when I put on my cologne when I am getting ready to go out, Shelby looks at me and says "oh no, what did YOU roll in." It's me against two cats in my household and I'm outnumbered and outwitted.
  12. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    When it's us vs. cats. We are just lucky to be owned by such a superior specise.

    I'll bet the kitties dream of us humans fishing for trout in a nice mtn. stream, leaving it out in the sun until it reaches maximum stench and serving it up warm and reeking. Mmmm!

    I used to fish for trout when I lived in CO and was younger. I would clean my own fish, and everyone else's, and I knew how to fry them up just right. When I moved to FL, people were catching and releasing. I thought, "What's up with that?" I wanna eat what I catch.

    My daughter dated a guy named, Trout. No jokes please.

    Thanks for continuing the Cat Chronicles. It's better than medicne.

    Love, Mikie
  13. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    Shelby read that Mikie used to catch Trout and she's ready to visit "Auntie Mikie" for some good fresh trout. Shelby is taking her brother, wants my credit card, my car keys, is taking my scooter (because she says "why walk if you can ride") and will load the scooter on the back of my car and her and her brother will drive my car to visit. Shelby will handle the steering wheel and "bark" orders of "brake", "gas" to her brother below operating the pedals. And as always there is the problem of her brother mistaking "gas" for meaning he can finally release his pent up natural gas, but that's Shelby's problem.

    But we have hit a pothole on this planned trip to Mikie--I do not have enough special food for Shelby's brother stocked in for the trip. Ah, a CATastrophe for the trout lover.
  14. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    I no longer live in CO. They could visit me here in FL and play with Sylvester and Tweety Pie next door. They love to play with the otters in our pond out back and with he possum who comes around after dark.

    Love, Mikie
  15. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    Shelby was in shock that you had no "Trout Clout" (I guess that means you have no trout) and so she was unpacking her Hello Kitty luggage. I tried to make it better by feeding her the Trout canned cat food today.

    Later I was sitting on the sofa and was presented with her tail to pet (this is equal to the Queen letting you hold her multi-million dollar jewelry).

    I also told Shelby that today and the next two weeks will be tight with apppointments and things I need to do, so we'll hold off on she and I going to the big craft/hobby place so she can be my muse/mews and we gather what strikes us for me to create her in art as the ancient Egyptian Sphinx. She has that stink face so she may feel her artistic beauty is being put on hold. Maybe I better go run my errands now before I end up buried at the bottom of the litter box, never to be seen again.

  16. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Thinks she should be Cleopatra. Instead of milk, she could bathe in trout juice.

    Love, Mikie
  17. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    I think Shelby bathing in trout juice would be the equivilent of a love potion. Then I would have suitors lined up and down the street and Shelby would have me interview them with questions similar to below:

    --Would you obey the Cat Mafia?

    --Do you know how to operate the brake and gas pedals on a car?

    --Would you feign being a sweet, loveable kitty to accomplish a mission?

    --Would you obey an order to pound somebody with litter box cookies?

    --Do you have any problems taking orders from a female cat (if so step to the next room and Shelby will be "discussing" this with you; uh, do you want a last meal?)

    [This Message was Edited on 10/15/2011]
  18. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    This reminds me of a feline version of the old "Dating Game."

    The bachelor cat with the most trout wins the date. Trout clout wins every time.

    Love, Mikie
  19. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    Today I received an e-mail addressed to Shelby. It was from the art teacher telling Shelby that the teacher was back from an extended vacation so art class would begin soon so definitely sign up, she's looking forward to seeing Shelby in class and her mother (which means me and usually people don't remember my name, but they remember the name of the cat).

    Yes, Shelby has trout clout--I, on the other hand, have no clout. I did take Shelby to get her nails clipped today because they had grown into talons. Tomorrow I will sign up for the art class and Miss Trout Clout with her clipped nails is ready to go with me to the art class. Did I mention (or need I mention) that Miss Trout Clout manipulates people with her eyes and that face she gives people, and they tell me "oh isn't she so cute, she was so easy to clip her nails." And I look at them and they have no idea how many times we did CCW (Claw Cutting Wrestling) in the past and I lost each time, which is why I bring her to them.
  20. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Puss in the "Shrek" movies dialates his eyes and everyone just melts. When I was a cashier at the supermarket (my little part-time retirement job--is that an oxymoron :) they made us push bags of food for the food pantry, bags of school supplies, and donations to a different charity about every other month. A lot of cashiers didn't like it but my background is sales so I took it on as a challenge. I decided that if I looked people right in the eye and got really interested in them, my eyes would dialate and they would contribute. It worked! I outsold everyone in the store, including those who worked full time. I learned that from a cat and a cartoon cat at that! I actually liked beging able to do some good while working.

    We can learn a lot from cats.

    Love, Mikie