Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by doxygirl, Jul 26, 2006.

  1. doxygirl

    doxygirl New Member

    First of all I want to say " thank you" so much for always being right here when I need you!

    It means so much to me to come on here and look up my posts and see so many of you have written to me giving me your support and showing me you care!

    Honestly I just can't thank you all enough!

    So..............here is my "update".............last night was extremely hard for me........I was mentally, and emotionally exhausted from the three page letter that insecure and deranged girl wrote defaming my entire family!

    I woke up this morning feeling stronger and not so sad...in fact I feel angry now.......so Iam going to put to good use my anger...........Iam going to fight back!

    I started fighting back by making an office visit to my counselor that has known me for over 8 years now...

    this man is my mentor in life.............he has helped direct me through some of the worst situations in my life...

    I took the "three page" defaming letter with me and asked him to read it..........I also asked him if he would write me a letter elaborating the character he knows in me.

    He said that we should indeed seek legal counsel.....but went on to say that he is no lawyer , but that he could take that letter and tear them apart bit by bit........in other words he thinks that letter is self damaging to them! "The ones who wrote it"!

    I also called every single one of my friends, family, and colleagues that know me well, and asked each one to write a letter of my character as they see me.....I did NOT tell anyone of them what to write I only asked them to tell the truth about what kind of person they see me as!

    I already have 7 letters! "YES" I do have many people that love me and Iam so fortunate for that...........thankfully they are all the kind of people that are willing to speak up and speak up truthfully about the "real" Doxy!

    "Ok" I also called the lawyer that I had initially went to for a consultation......... ( the one we wanted to retain in the first place )and she was laughing at the letter!

    Not in a bad way.............. but in a way where she says "You have NOTHING to worry about!

    So..............Iam now trying to get ahold of all of my sons friends and see if we can pull together all of the money for the lawyers retainer fees.........I may even have a car wash with my sons friends so we can provide the funds for him!

    My son is devastated and confused............and my heart aches to see him sad like this.........he seems so lost! I can see just how much he truly loves his baby.......!

    He even told me some people were telling him to just give up and let the mom and other grandmother have their way!

    But I told him "NO" Cohen needs his Daddy and we need to fight for him to show him we care and love him ! If we give up Cohen will grow up thinking we didn't love him or care enough to fight for him!

    I just hope that when the mom and other grandmother defame us to Cohen that he can see through it because no matter what a child will always love their mother,,,,,,,,,I just don't want him to believe their lies and turn on us...........

    I just wanted to let you all know that Iam going to do everything I can to help my son...........I will keep you posted on how things are progressing and please keep all of this "mess" in your prayers!

    Thank you again for caring.......

    [This Message was Edited on 07/26/2006]
  2. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    way! i am glad you are thinking and acting in a mature manner and w/class....

    hopefully the mother will be smart enough to end the ugly situation....

    the most influenecial person in a childs life is the same sex parent......

    i am sure the family judge will be talking to both of the parents on the issue of not talking badly about the other parent....in front of the child....

    well sending good thougts to your family

  3. PVLady

    PVLady New Member

    I am impressed.... good for you!!! You are not going to let anyone do this to you and I am glad. I wish you the best of luck...
  4. doxygirl

    doxygirl New Member

    thank you!

    I feel so much better!

    When my bosses wife made a special trip to my work to drop off the "character" letter she wrote for me......it really just made my day..............although I know that I truly am a good person...........seeing those things written on paper and coming from someone who truly is honest and cares..........was overwhelming in a good way!

    I sometimes find myself doubting that "I try hard enough in life situations" like maybe I should have done this or that or tried harder.............it is always so easy to doubt ourselves.............

    But I know right now I need to focus on my strengths and my goodness...............and let that prevail.........Iam going to "SHINE" in that court room...Iam going to hold my head up HIGH and Iam going to be the proud person I truly am.............

    I have done NOTHING to deserve these nasty defamations so Iam not going to be ashamed!

    THEY should be ashamed of themselves..........if they are not then that is their problem and NOT mine...

    somehow I just know in their heart they have to know that they behave and say things like this because they are insecure and feel very badly about themselves............they create their own misery and deny that they indeed do it at all!

    I feel sorry for them!

    Thank you for your encourgagement

  5. onlythestrong

    onlythestrong New Member

    Good for you,I know you will kick A**!
    And we'll all be on the side lines.......
    Good luck and hugs,
  6. carebelle

    carebelle New Member

    Doxy any letters you have for court get them noterised .your bank can do this with each person there to sign .The courts will not take them unless they are sign dated and by a notery.
    I would also just offer them for witness of your charactor donot make a big deal .Also they need to remark about you love and careing of children in your care.
    good luck we are thinking of you
  7. lurkernomore

    lurkernomore New Member

    I have been reading of your problems with the baby's mother and grandmother and if they show up in court, acting the only way they seem to know how to act, I don't think you have a worry. Man, was that ever a run-on sentence!

    What I am trying to say is from what I have observed, you are a class act. You are a woman of your word and you only want what is best for your grandson.As for your son, even with the initial doubts, regarding the paternity, once it was proven that he was the father, he did his part too.

    So these judges see and pick up on soooo much more than we give them credit for, most of the time. Just keep on keeping on and being yourself. I really believe this will all come out to your favor, simply because you are the way that you are. (Did that make any sense at all? :)
  8. tata1580

    tata1580 New Member

    Nothing like the will of a grandma...

    prayer and best wishes for you and your family...

    Now Git R Done!!!
  9. doxygirl

    doxygirl New Member

    I wanted to let all of you know that last night I was going through my papers ..............I found the card that the other grandmother wrote and gave to me on mothers day of this year:

    My husband and I had taken them ( Mom of cohen, Cohen, and the other grandmother ) to Red lobster for mothers day dinner....after dinner she gave me a card that says:

    "I just wanted to take this opportunity to say thank you for being so supportive to my daughter.

    It means so much to us.

    Your a wonderful person and a wonderful grandma........I will do everything I can to make sure you and your husband will be in Cohens life as much as possible.

    Iam grateful to have found a new friend through all this mess.

    We share such a beautiful grandson and hopefully a beautiful friendship too.

    Thanks for everything you have done for my daughter and Cohen.

    Hopefully things calm down soon.( meaning when the paternity test results came back)

    Signs her name

    "Ok guys what do you think about this"? I am giving a copy of this to our attorney..........and Iam bringing the homemade photo frames she made ( mom of cohen) for easter, fathers day, and mothers day, saying "I love you Grandma and Grandpa" on all of them................why would she do this is if she hated me, and thinks I was "unfit"?

    I believe this PROVES that there was NO problem between us at all until my son filed for joint custody the day he got his paternity test results back!

    it also shows that I have been good to them and helped them, ( buying diapers, formula, clothes etc for Cohen)

    I'd like to know what you all think?

    [This Message was Edited on 07/27/2006]
  10. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    whenit comes to child custody and divorces it can get all too nasty...the truth will all come out...three sides to every story.

    and i am sure your son will come out swinging a homerun...all for the name of cohen!!!!!

    i am glad you have found the card and pics...the judge is going to give the mother and grandmother a nice firm spanking i believe....


  11. petsrme

    petsrme Member

    Doxy, I have GOT to catch up on what has been happening with you. I am so sorry for not being here for you. I have been having probs with hands and arm and not posting much. I cannot believe these people! Your counselor is right. They will hang themselves with their lies and stupidity. I don't know how someone could say bad things about you. You are so nice and caring. Their card to you proves that even more than any words I can say. If you need another letter I will be glad to write one. I feel as if I know you and I know I know your character. I know a friend online is not as convincing, but I don't even have to mention that. If you need me to let me know. Keep fighting! You will win. Love you.
  12. doxygirl

    doxygirl New Member

    Thank you so much for caring........I would love it if you could write me a letter.......if you want you can fax it to my work! The more letters I have the more it will show Iam nothing close to what they claim Iam!

    I can email you the fax # ok!

    But........if your wrists are giving you problems please don't do it ok!

    Honeslty, I appreciate you love and willingness.........but I feel so bad for you that your wrists are giving you so many problems and I truly don't want you to make it worse!

    I feel so much better with all the love and support everyone is giving to me................I have had so many people write the most beautiful letters for me!

    I honestly know I have a sincere and loving heart .....but it makes me cry.........to see how so many people in my life truly see this in me......it makes me feel like my efforts in life have all been validated when I read the letters I have from supporters.

    Thank GOD for the GOOD people in this world and for the fact that so many of them have touched my life!

    I love you too.....................thank you again.........let me know if there is anything I can do for you ....I know i live far......but really if there is anything I can do let me know!


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