Update on me (Tigger)

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Tigger57, Jul 8, 2006.

  1. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    I know I've been gone for awhle again, but things here have NOT been good at all. I'm just starting to come out of what I call my "fatigue flares". I've been sleeping about 12-16 hours a day and barely feel rested when I wake up. It's a combination of fibro and depression, I'm sure. It's been so bad that I was even afraid to drive. Yesterday was the first day I felt well enough to drive without falling asleep at the wheel.

    The employment agency I was working for decided that I didn't finish my assignment and are trying to block me from collecting Unemployment. A woman called from the unemployment office and wanted to know "my side" of what happened. I told her it was the second time I was jerked around by this agency and I couldn't afford it any more financially or emotionally. I left because they were interviewing people and I wasn't included, and I left on Friday and they planned on placing someone in the spot in a week or maybe earlier and I had my heart set on this job even though I know it would have been difficult to keep it. What did she want, for me to wait until they kicked my butt out the door? I also told the woman from unemployment that I did not feel this was a very reputable agency and I will not allow them to place me anywhere. Enough is enough.

    I think since I last posted I fell and ended up bruised all over. It was another one of those falls that getting up was very difficult and I seemed to do more damage trying to get up. I had two of the blackest eyes I have ever seen and I managed to brake a small bone in my nose. It was so bad that when I woke up the next morning and looked at my face I just cried. I had bruises all over me. Doc just figured it had to do with my meds. He wants me to use a cane if I go downstairs... I told him I'd bring my phone.

    So, I'm battered and bruised, no income, feel very sick, going to have to sell my house, have no insurance on my car right now and pretty much everything else is going to shut off soon. As for my brother? I guess he takes that old saying to heart... "When the going gets tough, the tough get going." I think he's gone. I haven't heard from him in at least 2 weeks and he only lives 10 miles from me. He's never been very good for support for any length of time.

    I'm in a very scary place right now between the depression and the fibro. I'm hoping this passes soon.

    Thank you all for your support. I really appreciate it.
    Hugs,
    Tigger
  2. lovethesun

    lovethesun New Member

    Have you filed for disability yet.We went through having to sell our house but since we both have health problems we couldn't keep up anyway.Some times the utilities will work with you if you explain the situation

    I would use a cane if I were you.I've had several times when i seemed to be walking fine and a knee would go out or I'd suddenly lose my balance.
    It may not seem it now but there will be an end to this awful time

    I'm praying for you to heal from your fall and you find the support that you desperately need
    Meanwhile we are here...(((((((((((HUGS)))))))))Linda
    [This Message was Edited on 07/09/2006]
  3. Scapper

    Scapper New Member

    I am so sorry to hear that you're suffering so. Those falls you have sound very scary and dangerous. I hope you can get some help with a cane to prevent further damage.

    It certainly does seem like things can just keep getting worse. I'm suffering greatly and am also going through a dark time right now.

    Try to hang on and grab support wherever you can!!!

    scapper
  4. JLH

    JLH New Member

    It really saddens me to hear how things are for you. I really wish there was something that we all could do to help you--I know I would try, even though I'm not able to do much either.

    If they try to beat you out of your unemployment, like what they appear to be doing, can you get a Legal Aid lawyer to help you fight it?

    Do you have the strength to begin writing all of your politicians asking for their help in obtaining your social security asap? I have a sample letter if you need one. I know lawyers will advise you not to do that ... because the sooner you get it, the less percentages of backpay goes to them! I think they get 25% of your backpay--I may be wrong, I can't remember squat!--so the longer they draw it out, the more money they make.

    I'm sorry to hear about your fall. I fell out of my computer chair and, as a result, just had to have knee surgery. But I didn't end up with 2 black eyes like you did, though! I think your doc made a good suggestion about using a cane. I have always used one when I went outside, but now I am even using one in the house.

    I hope you can work something out so you don't have to sell your house. That would be awful.

    I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

    Love and Hugs,
    Janet
  5. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    i hope your unemployment comes thru...if not does your state have short term disability to apply for instead?

    file for ssi/and or ssdi....

    file for general assistance and anything else the state will give you...now is not the time to be proud...

    call salovation army and churches to help you out..


    jodie
  6. PVLady

    PVLady New Member

    I am so sorry things have been so bad. Do you ever use the "chat"? I would like you to email me but I can only give you my email in the chat room. I believe it is ok for us to give our email in the chat room. If someone thinks that is wrong let me know. (I don't want to get banned).

    I have a close friend who lives in your state who may be able to help you. I don't want to post her info on the website.

    Hang in there.....you are in my prayers..
  7. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    Thank you all for your support. That's all I need right now is support.

    It sure has been tough, and I pray and talk to my parents (who both have passed away), just to try and stay "motivated" to keep going on.

    I thought applying for SSDI was a big "ouch" to my ego, but the cane... I'm not ready for that yet. I'd only have a cat or dog thinking its a toy.

    Thank everyone. I'm just so overwhelmed by everything that I don't know what to do.
    Hugs,
    Tigger
  8. IntuneJune

    IntuneJune New Member

    Awh Tigger, I am so sorry.

    June
  9. CockatooMom

    CockatooMom New Member

    Gosh, and I thought WE were going through some rough stuff!
    I am SO SORRY you are having to go through all of this!

    It may not help much, only because we cannot be there in the flesh, but you know we are all here for you and you travel down this path. Too bad your brother isn't. Maybe he'll come around.

    I agree with Dncnfngrs, I'd try a walker, but maybe a quad cane would be better for the steps.

    This message comes to you with lots of love, hugs, and support.

    Love,
    CockatooMom
  10. Cromwell

    Cromwell New Member

    I thought you were going on Disability? You are so ill I really think you should.

    I am so sorry you are going through this. Try and sit out in fresh air, being indoors all the time does not help, even if you are just outdoors sleeping it is going to help.

    I pray things will get better for you.

    Love Anne Cromwell
  11. springrose22

    springrose22 New Member

    I also thought you were applying for disability. You most certainly qualify. And, as someone else said, a walker would be much better than a cane. Thinking of you and hoping you get disability so that you can stay home and rest and heal. Marie
  12. keke466

    keke466 New Member

    Hi,it seems we're just about in the same boat. I was fired from my job on 6-20 after 8yrs. I'm single and no kids. Filed for unemployment and talked to them last th and I just got thru filing my weekly claim and they told me I was denied on an issue. When I was talking to the man he sounded positive cause he seemed to be telling me I was but couldn't come right out and say it. He told me I needed to get a medical release ASAP and fax it to him. I'm hoping that's all they're waiting on. My money will run out before the end of next month. I'm probably going to end up losing my house too. It's awful we have to suffer after working our whole lives. I'm thinking bout filing for SSD and get it started.

    Good Luck to you and if you come across anything that might help me also let me know. Keke
  13. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    My rheumy wants me to apply for General Assistance, but he assumes these are things everyone knows... I don't. I don't even know where to begin.

    I know I can no longer pay $450 for my duragesic patch each month. Any money I get I would much rather put it toward the house payment.

    SSDI is calling tomorrow and then the ball will be rolling... of course I'll probably be pushing it up hill, but I've got to do everything in my power.

    As for the cane... to be completely honest... I'm afraid my brother and sister-in-law will think I'm being overly dramatic. I don't think they have a clue how bad off I am. They live in a completely different world. After all they just got all new (very expensive) living room furniture. All I have right now is plenty of dog food, cat food, toilet paper and protein for the shakes I have to drink to supplement my gastric by-pass surgery.

    Janet, some days I have the strength to write to my politicians, but my cognitive functions have gone way down hill. My brain has just pooped out.

    Thanks though.
    Tigger
  14. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    I'm filing for disability. As everyone knows it takes time and I sure would like to know how one survives in the meantime.

    I mean my house is small... only one bedroom, but I'm fighting like crazy to keep it. If it was just me, I probably wouldn't care, but I have four fur-kids who have saved me over the past few years and they deserve to have the best home possible.

    Tigger
  15. lovethesun

    lovethesun New Member

    If you need a cane ,you need it,whatever anybody else says.I have one with purple flowers on it.The straight handle is best for balance.They even have clear lucite canes and colored ones too.Linda
  16. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    I really don't think I need it. Yes, I have these falls, but not that often. Granted when I do fall, I manage to do a good amount of damage.

    I don't think my fall is what hurts, it's the attempt to get up. It seems like when I try to get up, my body just won't let me.

    I'm so confused.
    Tigger
  17. Cromwell

    Cromwell New Member

    It is ridiculous leaving you like this-what a system.

    Can you get SSI or some other help? You surely have to get help whilst you are waiting. Things have changed, when I filed for DD for Dan we had it within five weeks and backdated.

    I am sorry, and you are right the furbabies are important. Can you do a reverse mortgage? I think Mayline did a while back.

    Can you use the local food pantry to help get some foodstuffs(they also have cat food at some)

    Love Anne Cromwell
  18. Cromwell

    Cromwell New Member

    It is ridiculous leaving you like this-what a system.

    Can you get SSI or some other help? You surely have to get help whilst you are waiting. Things have changed, when I filed for DD for Dan we had it within five weeks and backdated.

    I am sorry, and you are right the furbabies are important. Can you do a reverse mortgage? I think Mayline did a while back.

    Can you use the local food pantry to help get some foodstuffs(they also have cat food at some)

    Love Anne Cromwell
  19. PITATOO

    PITATOO Member

    So sorry. It is not fair I know. But things do get better. I have been in the same place. I'm not a religious person and won't say pray and things will get better. It is something you have to work at and it all starts in your head. I was ready at one time in my life to check out. But did not and things did change and although I am divorced, single, take care of my father who has alzheimers etc....and on....I love every moment of life now. Yes I still hurt a lot but got over the depression. I think mine was some of the pills I was on. What are you taking a lot of them can cause depression. One I was taking caused me to totally withdraw from everything and that is not like me. I was always the life of the party and the "trouble maker" at work. I loved to laugh. It also caused parkinson's like syndrome. So a lot of drugs that are suppose to help can actually cause depression. Not saying that it is not the fibro that casuses the depression but some drugs make it worse. And I do believe that Fibro comes first then depression not the other way around like some Doc's try to make you believe.

    It is scary and it will pass. I run a support group and have helped numerous with the same situations. WIsh you were closer so I could help.

    Gentle Fibrohugs - Bobby
  20. Line

    Line New Member

    I am so sorry for what you are going through, I will be praying that things turn around for you.

    Hugs, Linda