I know we all go thru this...the ups and downs of a chronic illness. I haven't been feeling well at all for several weeks now, I know in part it is seasonal. We also have some family stress, a MIL in end stage emphysema. But, for me, I am having a heck of a time staying positive. Most of the time I can manage this illness of mine. Of course I do have days where I am barely moving because I feel so darn lousy...but all in all I have managed to keep a pretty good outlook for the 3 years since dx. But lately...boy, I am tired of it all. I am tired of everything being an effort. I am tired of not being able to make plans ...because I am always cancelling them. I am tired of every single darn chore I do being an effort. I am tired of being no fun. I am just worn out by it all. I don't think I am depressed...even though I KNOW how this sounds when you read it. I still find things to make my self happy...I paint, I sew, I have people I stay in touch with on a regular basis. I just seem to be in a place where I have a hard time finding the energy of life. I am not sure anyone has any brillian words of wisdom about this ...but I would sure be glad to read anything that you can offer. I am expecting that most of us feel like this at times...It is just hard to be sick every day...and I have had 2 whole days since LAST summer where I would say I felt really good. TWO DAYS IS NOT ENOUGH!!!! I don't mean to sound like a child about this...but I guess in a way that is how I feel right now. I want to go pout. I want to get my way. I want someone to just feel sorry for me and work hard to cheer me up. I want something DIFFERENT than what I am getting every day. I want to be fixed...and yet I know there is no fixing this...there may be improvement from time to time..and breaks in the cycle..but at this point, no real fix. So..thanks for taking the time to read this...I just had to go somewhere will all this stuff. I tried to talk to my husband this morning..but he really wasn't quite getting it..and ended up just saying..if you need a break...you just can take one. But , it isn't just a break from chores...or participating that I want...I want a break from FMS!