What does forgiving mean?

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by annab, Aug 27, 2003.

  1. annab

    annab Guest

    Just a question I've been asking a lot lately. I've been hurt by plenty of health care professionals because I have CFS. I've been struggling to figure out how to forgive one in particular. Here are a few of my thoughts.

    What Does Forgiving Mean?

    What does forgiving mean?
    Surely not to say it never happened,
    Or to say you were right.
    So what does forgiving mean?
    I still carry around the wounds of your actions,
    I still fear your labels might be right.
    So what does forgiving mean?
    Does it mean letting you harm others as you harmed me?
    Does it mean never telling you that what you did was wrong?
    So what does forgiving mean?
    Does it mean I should teach you what is right?
    Does it mean I no longer have to bear the agony of your labels?
    So what does forgiving mean?
    It means removing your labels from my heart
    And shifting responsibility for your actions back to you.
    Forgiving means I’m now free
    I can follow truth and knowledge now,
    I am not what you tried to force upon me.
    Forgiving means only God and I choose what labels I wear.
  2. tambourinekid77

    tambourinekid77 New Member

    forgiving means to let your feeling about somthing that may have happen go both from your mind ,heart,& soul too ok.never bringing it back up ever again ever ok.that is what
    forgivness means ok.jesus forgave 7x70 that is true forgivness ok.
  3. Takesha

    Takesha New Member

    I am so sorry that you have been hurt and others have failed you. This I am afraid is part of being human that is sometimes painful. I like your post however because it talks about making choices and yes forgiveness is a choice.
    Some do think that forgiveness is like letting the offending party off of the hook with out suffering any consequences, but with God, we always reap what we sow, so their is a consequence for God and Bad, and that is a spiritual rule that is at work even if we don't see it.
    To me, forgiveness is a two sided coin, my forgiving others allows them the room to be human and fail without my being angry. Forgiveness also frees me from anger,bitterness, seeking revenge and in short using energy for negative things that I'd be better off using for the positive.
    There is also another factor to forgiveness, and that is if we don't forgive, God cannot forgive us. The bible says in Luk 6:37 Judge not: and you shall not be judged. Condemn not: and you shall not be condemned. Forgive: and you shall be forgiven.

    It is a hard step to take some times but I have gone thru being raped, had 2 attempts on my life (once by my own mother at age 3) and I was abandoned by my whole family. Still, I learned that forgiving was necessary for me to be able to face life with open arms.
    I hope this helps, just remember, that we as humans fall very short of perfection, and in forgiving others, you will find that if you ever do something that hurts someone else, that forgiveness will find its way to you also.
    I am sending you hugs.
    [This Message was Edited on 08/27/2003]
  4. Takesha

    Takesha New Member

    Isn't Your Bag Heavy Enough?

    One day, a teacher had each one of his students bring a clear plastic Bag and a sack of potatoes. For every person they refused to forgive in their life experience, they were told to choose a potato, write on it the names and date, and put it in the plastic bag. Some of the students' bags, as you can imagine, were quite heavy.

    They were then told to carry these bags with them everywhere for one month, putting it beside their beds at night, on the car seat when driving, next to their desk at school. The hassle of lugging this around with them made it clear what a weight they were carrying spiritually, and how they had to pay attention to it all the time to not forget, and keep leaving it in embarrassing places.

    Naturally, the condition of the potatoes deteriorated to a nasty slime. This was a great metaphor for the price we pay for keeping our pain and heavy negativity! Too often we think of forgiveness as a gift to the other person and it clearly is for us!

    So the next time you decide you can't forgive someone, ask yourself : ... "Isn't my bag heavy enough?"

    "Since God chose you to be the holy people whom he loves, you must clothed yourselves with tender hearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. You must make allowance for each other's faults and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. And the most important piece of clothing you must wear is love.

    Love is what binds us all together in perfect harmony." Colossians 3:12-14 NLT

    "If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6:14-15 NLT

  5. annab

    annab Guest

    Hi again,
    I tried to just hand it over to Jesus two years ago. But that didn't automatically erase it all. I have struggled to find a way to forgive truly. I appreciate your input. Now, Matt. 5:44 says, "love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you."
    These verbs all indicate DOing something. I try to help others who are struggling too. But it is so hard to do good to those who are powerful and have the ability to cause harm. Does anyone else struggle with this to? Jesus forgave everyone. But in day-to-day situations, he did a variety of things. Sometimes he remained silent. Sometimes he told parables to get them to think. Sometimes he taught. Sometimes he bluntly told people what he thought of their actions. But he worked always with love, and with helping these people in mind. He did not pretend that what people were doing was all right. He obviously knew how to handle each situation. I want to follow His example. I guess I'm struggling to understand when different actions are appropriate. I know love has to be my motive.
  6. annab

    annab Guest

    I read what you said about never bringing it up again. This has been nagging at my mind. I'm no expert on this, but we know that Jesus forgave all the trespasses against him. If those trespasses can't ever be brought up again, then why are the scriptures filled with so many stories about the awful things that were done? Obviously Jesus forgave them. So He wouldn't be holding these things over their heads anymore. Yet we still have those stories as examples to help us know what to do in the same situations. Is it appropriate to bring those things up to teach and to learn from?
  7. Takesha

    Takesha New Member

    that forgiving is something personal, one knows if they have forgiven or not. But I don't think using our experiences is a bad thing. I just don't use names or anything that would point the finger.
    I think that we have to follow what the Holy Spirit puts on our hearts to do. Pray and ask the Lord what you should do or if you should do anything other than forgive. If there is a person who is breaking the law for instance (lets just say an abuser) and this person has abused you and you know they are also abusing others, then yes we have to forgive, but we also have a moral responsibility to try to stop that person by reporting it. These would be two differnt actions.
    If it is a friend or family member, you may be led to go to them and ask their forgiveness, for your unforgiveness, and then try to straighten the situation out. Everyone is differnt and some are more easily offended than others, and I think sometimes if we are that way, we just need to ask God to heal us, and help us not to be so sensitive.
    I think that one just really has to ask the Lord to guide them in each incidence. The most important thing we can do for ourselves and others is to walk a walk of love. That does not include making ourselves victims, but our actions and words should be loving. I have been corrected various times, but it was done in a loving way, and the conviction that came with it, was what produced the change in me. Does this make any sense?
    I hope that it helps.
  8. lcskaya

    lcskaya New Member

    I just came from my thurs bible study and our book was on the love of God.We must forgive as Christ forgave us ,but only with the help of God can we do this .He said love one another as I have loved you. I know this is hard and a post I just read of a little girls statement is so right on, being a christian is hard. BUT that is why Jesus said on his nite of betrayel that He must go but He is sending another comforter to us. BY the Holy Spirits help we CAN do it. CAROLINE
  9. annab

    annab Guest

    Your answers have helped. I guess for some of us, the journey just takes longer. Like it says in Isaiah 28:10 precept upon precept, line upon line.
    I am committed to seeing this journey to forgiveness to the end, and I'm learning a lot along the way. You're right, only the Holy Ghost can help after all we can do.