what is wrong with me?? depression or am i a nut case?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Debra49659, May 28, 2008.

  1. Debra49659

    Debra49659 New Member

    i have been so weepy lately, tears come to my eyes at a drop of a hat. i know i am suffering with depression but i think i am just feeling sorry for myself.

    i am going from tears to extreme anger in 2.3 seconds, i just don't know what my deal is!!

    just now i am in a relatively good mood, yet I can feel the tears on the horizon.

    has anyone else experienced this??
  2. CanBrit

    CanBrit Member

    Our conditions do terrible things to us. I see that you have both CFS and FM. I was diagnosed with FM but am quite suspicious that I have CFS too. Gland swelling and sometimes such fatigue, I could collapse.

    Are you on any medications. I know many on this board to the natural way for help, but I've found that for me I need my anti-depressant along with my pain medications. I get moments of weepiness and anger. It comes and goes.

    I think that between all the fatigue and pain we experience, it just gets too much and we kind've lose it. For me, I think, I go through moments of grieving for my past life. My husband and I have only been married for 10 years (second, and the absolute best). There's so many things I can't do anymore.

    I'm fortunate that I'm still working but even there the writing is on the wall. (See my other recent post) See your Dr. about reviewing your medications. 80% of the time, my meds help me through the day. There are always going to be bad moments, but I try to suck them up!

    I do hope you feel better soon. You're not alone in this.


  3. Ranigar

    Ranigar Member

    I just went through this myself.I knew I had some depression issues for a couple yrs. off and on but with chronic illness I figured who wouldn't be depressed right?Well I had a bad reaction to a new med and it pushed me over the edge.Like you the tears were right under the surface all the time.I cried my eyes out when I was alone and I was so irritable and angry.It all came to a head around after Christmas.Anxiety attacks were more frequent and I felt out of control.I sobbed to my DH to help me get a Dr. appt.Poor guy had no idea.I had covered it up so well.
    Please spare yourself anymore misery and see your doc.I felt guilty,embarrassed and like I let everyone down but once the meds started working within a few days I felt much more in control and got more and more like my old self.I wish I had seen it sooner and I can't get over how screwed up my reasoning had gotten.I wish you well and hope you get better.
  4. Debra49659

    Debra49659 New Member

    just the support has me in tears...lol!! i am taking 40mg of paxil. i wonder if i need more!! i will make an appointment with the doc, you are right. we have to keep our mental health in check we have to much more to deal with. i had a hysterectomy a couple of years ago, so i'm not sure i still would suffer from the pms?? i know the pain is pretty much gone from all that female mess (except for some weird right side pelvis pain).

    again thanks for the support i couldn't make it except for my extended family here....everyone here is a godsend.


  5. CanBrit

    CanBrit Member

    I also had a hysterectomy when I was 34 (I'm 52 now). If they left your ovaries in, you will still get hormonal symptoms until your body goes through natural menopause.

    I had severe endometriosis as well as large fibroids and my insides were an absolute mess. I still went through perimenopause, but am now well past it all. Even my estrogen level is almost no existent.

    I take Zoloft but my daughter takes Paxil. Do check with your Dr. It's amazing to get emotional relief, even if it does come in a pill.

  6. sjustic1

    sjustic1 New Member

    Hi, I'm new to this chat room as of this morning. I am having so much trouble dealing with the emotional side along with the pain that I feel like I'm freaking out. I know that I'm not normally like this and wonder how long it will last this time. I have had no one to really talk to about whats happening to me.
  7. brainfoggy

    brainfoggy New Member

    We have a debilitating illness and it's hard for me at least when I remember myself before. So different from now. I think few of us are clinically depressed just really sad at our level of health. Usually when I get really weepy I'm in a flare, dehydrated and sick. Flying off the handle is sometimes associated with low cortisol levels. Rhiodola root, ginseng, and B-vitamins help. I don't know what meds you are on, but trying some 5-HTP for mood is ok. I would get Dr. Teitelbaums book if you don't have it already. Hope you feel better!
  8. sascha

    sascha Member

    i imagine fm does, too. just the depletion of the body's forces causes a letdown on all levels. the physiological stresses definitely correlate with emotional stresses. our spirits can't help but respond to the low ebb of our physical being.

    it's not just me saying this. i've seen it in articles by professionals on the nature of cfids. i believe there's a physiological explanation for depression in PWC's.

    i read your bio- wow- you have a lot going on! i hope you can manage to make your life as streamlined and easy as possible, so that you can concentrate on enjoying your family and not expend energy on routine, repetitive tasks. get help!! as much as possible!!

    and don't beat yourself up about getting depressed/being emotionally volatile. know that a certain amount of that comes with the territory. maybe check out anti-depressant- it might make all the difference. i'm on one, and i know it helps.

    very best wishes to you~~~ Sascha
  9. mujuer

    mujuer New Member

    Maybe you are starting peri-menopause. Mine started in my late 30's and I am 50 now and starting menopause. That is what it sounds like to me. Talk it over with your doctor. There are alot of good books out there now about peri-menopause. It's just a guess but that is how I knew I was in it by everything you said that you were going thru. P
  10. poets

    poets Member

    I was wondering.....You described the mixed feelings of being up and down. True, it could be peri-menopause related, or hormone shifts, but since I'm Bi-Polar myself, I was wondering if perhaps that could be your problem. It sounds like the symptoms I used to get before I was put on something for the mania as well as the depression.

    It seems like depression is often mentioned, and mania is never considered. Mania can make you pretty miserable. It doesn't always happen to be the happy euphoric type. Mania often manifests itself in ways such as irritability and anger. You can go from depression to anger in a matter of minutes.
    Only your doctor could know for sure. I hope whatever the case may be, that you'll soon start to feel better.

  11. Debra49659

    Debra49659 New Member

    i think you all make so much sense. jammin, i also have a low thyroid and am being treated for that (throws some wicked curve balls that one, eh?) sjudtic1, welcome to the group and I hope you can find the support you need here.

    sounds like the thing to do is get all the bases checked. i have an appointment with my internist next month and can discuss the hormonal changes. I will also discuss a bi-polar cause. or, maybe i should check with a mental health professional. though i can't afford that:) i know i need one!! oh, and i also see my fm/cfs doc next month too!!

    once again, thanks so much for all the help...i appreciate it more that you know.

  12. Catseye

    Catseye Member

    You are probably just low on amino acids. See my post called neurotransmitter precursors from Jan 18 of last year. It talks about the different neurotransmitters and which aminos your body uses to make them. It is easier and safer to give your body what it needs to make the neurotransmitters than to take an antidepressant and force your body into not reabsorbing them. 5htp is the most common, it builds serotonin, but there are some others.

    Your body breaks proteins down into individual amino acids, so they are safe in reasonable doses.

    good luck

  13. Debra49659

    Debra49659 New Member

    my PCP put me on a vegetarian diet which i have strictly followed for the last 2 months, do you think this could be having an effect on my body chemistry?? oh, and take for the fyi on the posting i will check that out right now:)

    i am feeling much better today:) yeah!!, thanks again everyone for all the support.


  14. Catseye

    Catseye Member

    Absolutely! One of our main problems is digestion and putting someone on a veggie diet with CFS is not a good idea. You need concentrated protein. A vegetarian diet attempted by someone like us will most likely make you worse. That diet is for healthy people.

    We have to give the body easy to digest things and trying to count on vegetarian food, like legumes, for protein is not easy. There are too many things about grains and legumes which make them hard to digest. Google for "grains legumes hard to digest" and you'll see what I mean. Chicken and eggs I believe are the easiest foods to digest. And you should probably be taking betaine hcl and digestive enzymes with your protein and fat meals. If you eat veggies by themselves, you won't need the betaine hcl. It is a beet derived form of stomach acid - you are probably low in stomach acid.

    Have you seen my post about comprehensive stool analysis?

    And forgive me, but anyone who puts a person with CFS on a vegetarian diet doesn't know BEANS about CFS. That is a big mistake unless there is something really weird and oddball about your condition requiring that you have no concentrated protein, like maybe cirrhosis or something. I don't know, I'd have to look. If you have CFS, then you don't want to restrict yourself of proteins. And you want to avoid hard to digest foods like grains and legumes. Also see my thread about "stomach acid one key to CFS".

    also, if you google for Paleo diet, it will explain about food digestion

    good luck

  15. Debra49659

    Debra49659 New Member

    jamin...i do take synthyroid or the generic form of synthyroid. is armour a supplement over the counter kind of thing or should i talk to my fm/cfs specialist about it?

    karen...i had no idea, i thought the increase in pain and all the other mental issue were brought about by all the funky weather. I am going to google "easiest food to digest" and print it up. Wonder if a big mac is on that menu...lol!!

  16. dollinitup

    dollinitup New Member

    My Dear if you were not weepy and depressed I'd have to ask WHY?

    I have been dealing with this stuff over 30 yrs. I live on the verge of tears 24/7.

    Rest assure you are not alone but it is always a good idea to address this problem completely to rule out any other problem. In other words Don't ever leave a stone unturned when you are dealing with fm/cfs.

    Hope you feel better.
    (((comforting HUGS)))
  17. mbofov

    mbofov Active Member

    The paxil may be causing your severe mood swings. Read about its side effects, including worsening depressiong, anxiety, agitation etc. You're already on a high dose.

    DON'T add 5-htp while taking paxil as someone else suggested because 5-htp helps your brain produce serotonin, and you might develop serotonin syndrome (too much serotonin), which can be dangerous.

    However, I think 5-htp by itself WITHOUT an SSRI is a very good substitute for prescription AD's. It's an amino acid which naturally helps the brain produce serotonin without the sometimes dangerous side effects of AD's.

    You should talk to your doctor - really, the paxil may be causing the way you're feeling.

  18. btrekker

    btrekker New Member

    I truly understand, as I do the same thing. Unfortunately depression and anxiety go hand in hand with this dd. I also found out a couple of interesting things; My son is a Doctor of Optometry and tearing and/or dry eyes are common with Fibro. I also had a pastor tell me that with the disease and all that it has taken and with my story I lost a lot more, but especially myself. Is that I shouldn't be too hard on myself because I am in mourning. It's like a death. I have lost all my family members plus a horrible divorce from my one and only love and it's a lot like going through those things. I would out of the blue just start crying and crying. I think we should allow ourselves to mourn, as we have lost something very dear. I hope this helps in some way.
  19. Juloo

    Juloo Member

    I cannot say for certain that it is the vegetarian diet which is changing your moods, but I can say that it was DEFINITELY the case for my husband.

    About three years ago, he went from his normal diet to the Atkins Diet -- and true to form, he really kept himself on the low end of even that.

    His mood changed so much -- from my big teddy bear, to this person whose anger was just boiling right below the surface, ready to snap at any tiny provocation. I called the Atkins people to ask about this, because I had never seen my husband act this way before, but *supposedly* they'd "never heard of such a thing happening".


    My husband went off the diet one day and was himself by the next.

    I will NEVER let him do that again!
  20. Didoe

    Didoe New Member

    you mentioned you had a hysterectomy, was it a full or partial? if the surgery left one or both ovaries you may continue to experience monthly mood swings and other PMS symptoms as ovaries begin shutting down.

    and, if you have retained your ovaries, its possible the occasional right side sharp pain is an ovarian cyst; these are NOT cancer 99.9% of the time, but fluid filled benign cysts that form on the ovaries.

    if you retained your ovaries, please have a pelvic CAT scan, a sonagram in the doctors office is not enough; the usual treatment is no treatment because the ovaries normally dry up by themselves, but you need to be sure this is part of a normal process.

    I know only the best intentions are in place with recommending meds, supplements but in this case I would not consider anything until the ovary question is resolved, if you dont have them, clearly the options are wide open:)