When Someone Dies

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by chopperdoctor206, Aug 28, 2005.

  1. chopperdoctor206

    chopperdoctor206 New Member

    When Someone Dies

    When someone dies, you can’t talk together on the phone anymore, but you can still remember what the two of you used to say. It’s like you’re away from each other on a long vacation, and you have to keep remembering that this time, one of you can’t come back. When someone you love a lot dies, you get sad empty feelings. You don’t even know why are feeling so ..bad…Until you remember all over again. Sometimes you feel mad inside…mad that you are alone, unable to see that special face, hear the voice, or share thoughts, feelings, and times together. People don’t go away like this on purpose, or even set out to make you sad. That just happens….when someone dies.

    If the person who died was very important to you, you get to worrying that all the other important people might leave too. I’ve never hear of it happening that way, but it is hard not to think about it anyway. When people die, the can’t come to your house anymore. You wonder what they’d look like now, and you do all you can to make a picture of them in your mind. Oftentimes you go to sleep at night and dream about the person still being with you. You feel so happy. Then you wake up and the dream isn’t true, and the sad feeling almost bigger than it felt in the beginning.

    After someone dies, lots of people hang around together, people coming and going, crying- even laughing. It can be confusing, especially if you ’re a kid. It seems grownups don’t think about talking to you, or maybe they just don’t know what to say. Nothing in life seems like it used to be. At times like this, nothing in life is like it used to be. Even if you’re all grown up, you still don’t’ always understand, or know what to do or say to help yourself, or someone else

    So, whether you’re a kid or a tall person, there area a few thing you can do, when someone dies, that might help a little bit.. Find the person you love and trust the most and - go ahead and cry. You will feel better afterward, even if you cry so hard your nose plugs up and it’s hardly to get your breath. Don’t worry if the other person cries too. Something good happens when you cry together with someone you love.. You’ll both feel better , even if it doesn’t seem like it at the time. Sometimes it helps to write a letter to the person who died. Share you special feeling. Remember the fun or silly times you had together-laugh with the memories; cry if you need to. And if you want to say you’re sorry for something you didn’t get to say in person, say it in you letter. Even if you can’t write it all down by yourself, ask some one you trust to write it as you tell about it

    Remember that, we just have to go though those times of feeling bad, when some dies, and so do the people around us. But then we take time to think our thoughts and listen to our feelings, parts of each day seem to get better. Even thought there will be times when we’ll need to cry all over again. It’s the hardest times. Yet, it seems easier when we hold tight to the happy memories. When we talk about those memories and smile thinking of times we had with each other, it’s almost like keeping a special part of the person- right beside us…in our hearts. And when this happens, a beautiful secret of life reveals itself-- All those experiences we shared lovingly on earth are gracefully woven, over time, into a wonderful cape of comfort that fits all who love the one who went away.

    [This Message was Edited on 08/28/2005]
  2. jaltair

    jaltair New Member

    How very touching and true. A very beautiful piece of prose. Thank you for sharing with us.
  3. hdbubblehead

    hdbubblehead New Member

    YOU EXPRESSED MY THOUGHTS CHOPPER. ONLY A HEART WHO CAN EXPRESS THE LOSS OF LIFE IN THE DEPTH OF YOUR WORDS, COULD KNOW EXACTLY HOW TO TOUCH THE HAND OF GOD.
    YOUR WORD'S ARE PERFECTION!
    YOUR THOUGHTS ARE SO DEEP AND SINCERE, I FELT IT ALL THE WAY HERE. IS IT DIFFICULT TO KEEP YOUR WINGS UNDERCOVER?
    :) THANK YOU, I REALLY NEEDED TO KNOW THERE WAS SOMEONE "OUT THERE" WHO KNOWS HOW IT FEELS TO CONTINUE TO LIVE WHEN "SOMEONE YOU LOVE DIES". GOD HAS BLESSED YOU, KEEP WRITING.
    UNDER HIS WINGS, HD BUBBLE
    YOUR'E AWSOME!!!!
  4. virgo_karen

    virgo_karen New Member

    Thank you for posting your poeme. This past New Years Eve, I lost my best friend, soon to married to cancer. I really relate very much on what was said. It's so true, but life does go on, even though you are by yourself now. It's getting alittle better, I think of him so often. Today I had dinner with his family, they are great. They also have helped me so much and it means so much that they still think of me.
    Thank you again,
    Karen
  5. shep

    shep New Member

    Thank you so much for writing these heart felt words. I felt the meaning of them in my heart from yours.

    When my mom passed away as we stood by her bed and heard the words "she is gone" spoken...in my heart I could hear a host of angels and her Lord Jesus say very loudly "here she comes."

    When people we love die, they only get smaller to our eyes, but they get larger in our hearts. When we close our eyes in death; even death as final as it is can't keep out memories. And the more we think of them the larger and more precious they become.

    Isn't it wonderufl to know that even though we cannot understand exactly how it will be; we know that someday we will all be together again. As David said in the Bible at the death of his son, "He cannot come to me, but I can go to him."

    You have come to be a friend to me, one that I rejoice to see your name appear in the chat room. When I see your name listed I know I have made a connection with a friend I just haven't seen face to face yet. But, one I know understands me and will listen and have compassion for all of us that are trying to get to the day when we hear some people say, "Here she comes."

    Shep
  6. Starbright

    Starbright New Member

    Your words have come to me at the most perfect time. Both my parents passed within nine months of each other. It has been so hard to handle. Just when you have a time you think you might be able to cope....it all comes rushing back. Thank you so much for sharing.....Tricia
  7. heartinheaven

    heartinheaven New Member

    thank you for the post. I have lost several family members and this is very touching...

    Blessings to you Chopper


    H Michael