I don't know who I am anymore! Last night I layed in bed to cry myself to sleep - again. For the last 2 years especially I have found myself in difficult situations that would not have occurred years ago. I've been having a flare this past week and yesterday for some reason I did not take any of my medicine - nor did I the night before- which is very unusual. The night before I fell asleep and forgot and then the next day I didn't take it. I think that I am just so frustrated of taking the medicine that doesn't seem to help. (Valtrex- reduced dose of 3000; doxycyline - 400; wellbutrin 300 and many other supplements that are "supposed" to be helping). My son's school had an open house and I was running late and instead of taking my time I was pulled over by a police officer for speeding (46 in a 25) but it was for such a short distance, but he gave me a $158 ticket with 3 points!! I was so upset I could barely control my anger. I was rude to him and I am surprised that he let me go. When I came home I ask my husband, "what is wrong with me!!!" Who have I become???!!! I feel as though I just can't trust myself to make good decisions. I wonder sometimes if I shouldn't have a brain scan that there is something wrong other than the CFS and FMS. This is no kind of life! Thank you for letting me vent. I will openly accept any suggestions or advise. Yes, I am seeing someone but it almost seems that nothing will help.