Hi Friends, Just read Lifedancer's latest post. She's really down because her daughter has basically turned her back on her. This reminds me of a phenomonon I've noticed that I hope someone can shine some light on for me: it seems that a fair number of the spouces of disabled people leave their husbands or wives very soon after it becomes clear that the disabled person will never again be as productive as they had been before. Yet other the spouses of some fortunate disabled take on the responsibility of care with out a second thought, as if they had known all along that this would be part of the marriage. Has anyone else thought about this? As you might guess, my interest in not just academic. For over 2 years my husband has railed at and pleaded with me to get and keep a job, and for reasons too compex to go into, I have not been successful at this. The bottom line, however, is that I know my husband well enough to know that the only reason he hasn't divorced me is that we live in a community property state and he is too stingy to give me half the retirement fund and equity in the house! We don't get along too badly, but he's just making the best of a bad situation. So, really, I want insight about this phenomenon. Bill is a loving person in some ways but he hates me to go to the MD and thinks I am a huge hypochondriac. Thanks for any light you can shed on this subject. Love, Darcy PS Feel better little Lifedancer!