"Why People Don't Heal And How They Can"

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Mikie, Nov 6, 2002.

  1. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    I have been reading this book by Caroline Myss who had CFIDS. She also wrote "Sacred Contracts." It is going hand in hand with my new therapy which is helping me so much.

    Never does the author say we are responsible for our illnesses, but she does say we are responsible for our own healing. It is not enough for us to try everything we can to heal physically. Healing will only take place when we are ready mentally and spiritually to heal.

    The book does describe how to effect the spiritual healing necessary. It depends on being open spiritually and emotionally to new ways of thinking and seeing things, especially our illnesses. There is a strong message to not become what we have or to overidentify with our illnesses, which is so easy to do. It happens very slowly until we don't even realize it has happened.

    Support groups are a two-sided sword. It can become too easy to get comfortable in the company of others with our illnesses who are the only ones who truly understand how we feel. However, when support is in the form of information and help in healing, it is a positive thing in our lives.

    Venting can be healthy, especially when done where it is acceptable to speak freely; however, if one gets into the trap of constantly venting and receiving strokes, it can turn into an enabling situation. We need to be on guard against this.

    There will be people who are turned off by these ideas. Those people are probably not ready for this info. Things come to us when we are ready to receive them. I can only speak for myself, but I have found this book, and my therapy, to be very empowering. It has brought about a paradigm shift in my life and like all such shifts, nothing is different and everything is different.

    Love, Mikie

  2. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    I have been reading this book by Caroline Myss who had CFIDS. She also wrote "Sacred Contracts." It is going hand in hand with my new therapy which is helping me so much.

    Never does the author say we are responsible for our illnesses, but she does say we are responsible for our own healing. It is not enough for us to try everything we can to heal physically. Healing will only take place when we are ready mentally and spiritually to heal.

    The book does describe how to effect the spiritual healing necessary. It depends on being open spiritually and emotionally to new ways of thinking and seeing things, especially our illnesses. There is a strong message to not become what we have or to overidentify with our illnesses, which is so easy to do. It happens very slowly until we don't even realize it has happened.

    Support groups are a two-sided sword. It can become too easy to get comfortable in the company of others with our illnesses who are the only ones who truly understand how we feel. However, when support is in the form of information and help in healing, it is a positive thing in our lives.

    Venting can be healthy, especially when done where it is acceptable to speak freely; however, if one gets into the trap of constantly venting and receiving strokes, it can turn into an enabling situation. We need to be on guard against this.

    There will be people who are turned off by these ideas. Those people are probably not ready for this info. Things come to us when we are ready to receive them. I can only speak for myself, but I have found this book, and my therapy, to be very empowering. It has brought about a paradigm shift in my life and like all such shifts, nothing is different and everything is different.

    Love, Mikie

  3. Fairyeyes

    Fairyeyes New Member

    gotta get me that book.thanks!
  4. ssMarilyn

    ssMarilyn New Member

    I'm going to go look for these books too. I do know that when I was at my lowest, I was mentally dwelling on my health problems and I sincerely believe that I kept myself at that low just by doing that. It was when I listened to Joyce Meyers and she said "where the mind goes, the man follows" that I decided to attempt to separate myself from my FM and run free. Well, I tried it, and I think I helped myself get to the point I'm at now, and that is "pretty much 100% back to normal".

    Marilyn :)
  5. dojomo

    dojomo New Member

    I have read books authored by C Myss......and I do believe in spiritual contracts and spiritual health.

    And I incorporated her teachings into my plan of recovery...

    But my fear is the "Oprah affect"
    I began to feel like a spiritual failure because I still wasn't seeing healing.

    C Myss is very enlightening...but knowing spiritual "things" doesn't change all physical things......

    It is important to know that the change may only be inside..WHICH IS VERY GOOD !!!!........I don't want anyone to feel ike a spiritual failure because they couldn't "heal themselves" physically.......This is what is keeping Oprah from acknowledging us........

    Spiritual health is always important.....It gives me peace thru trials.....It is my spirituality that helps me endure....But I am not a spiritual failure if I don't get well.........remember that as you learn and grow spiritually..... Peace DJ



  6. ssMarilyn

    ssMarilyn New Member

    What is the "Oprah affect" ???

    Marilyn :)
  7. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Never does Caroline Myss suggest that changing spiritually will heal us physically, and I'm sorry if my post made it appear that that was what I was saying. What several of us here ARE saying is that lasting physical healing is not possible without healing the spirit.

    It is true that we live in the "fight or flight" mode when we are sick. It becomes a way of life for us. For me, that means making decisions only from my left brain/logic side. This totally ignores my right-brain emotional needs. I had been doing this for two years while I was in what Ms. Myss calls "The Dark Night of The Soul." I sought therapy because I was so entrenched in this mode that I could not find my way back by myself.

    While we are responsible for our spiritual and mental healing, there is only so much we can do to heal physically. We should never beat up on ourselves if we have done our very best and still are not well. There is a reason for everything.

    Marilyn, I loooooove Joyce Meyer. She is the "Dr. Phil" of preachers. She tolerates absolutely no self-pity and excuses because she has been there and done that. I imagine she has worn out a few tee shirts (love that Madwolf :)

    If any of y'all decide to read "Sacred Contracts," be prepared to do a LOT of personal work. I did skip some of it, like interviewing my archetypes, but I did the rest. Some may feel that casting the wheel is voodoo stuff, but I cast mine and it is exactly where I am and is paralelling my life and therapy. I believe the most important part is identifying our archetypes and how those parts of our personalities come into play in parts of our lives.

    Love, Mikie
  8. dojomo

    dojomo New Member

    ....See...we are on the same wave length......

    I guess what I was trying to say is....I thought that I would be able to help myself just by healing my spirit......that my physical problems were related to my broken spirit....

    I see that I am growing spiritually....yet it has no affect on my body......Why?.......

    That is my point.........I don't want to anyone to feel that the sign of spiritual growth is human health...because that is SO UNTRUE....

    And..I do feel that C Myss at times pushes that thought in her writings........

    Anyway......I see that we all basically have a similar "knowing" of things...so I"ll just say.......

    GOD BLESS...and peace.......DJ
  9. klutzo

    klutzo New Member

    My minister says that she thinks some of the most spiritually advanced people are the ones who have illnesses like ours. It takes great strength to take on something like this and learn the lessons it has to offer. Not all souls are up to it yet!
    I have read "Sacred Contracts" and found it to be the same stuff my church has always taught, but very good for those who belong to other religious traditions and have not yet been exposed to these ideas. Another book along these lines that is very good is "Your Body Believes Every Word You Say" by Barbara Hoberman Levine.
    Hugs,
    Klutzo
  10. GoDaleJr

    GoDaleJr New Member

    And have read it. I posted some stuff from it a long time ago. But I stopped reading it when I got to the part about the chakras. That was a bit much for me. But the main points she makes are good ones.
  11. JP

    JP New Member

    Hello Mikie and all,

    I knew I recognized the title...

    I participated in a weeklong course with Caroline Myss and Norm Shealy in 1998, "The Science of Intuition." I had an intense conversation with her, which resulted in a paradigm shift in my thinking at that time. I can't remember the conversation and I remember a shift in thought regarding my purpose or path.

    I tend to believe that this experience or illness is part of my spiritual path. I trust this experience completely and know that it is, and will continue to be a great teacher. It is also enabling me to become more of who I am. Today, I am physically forced to live in my body. As a result of this grounding I am able toexpress my feelings and I can find joy in the smallest of things. I feel intensely.

    This illness is not what I had in mind and it is my life desire to be of service. How can I serve if I am not completely authentic?

    something for me to think about anyway...thanks for the post, Jan
  12. sybil

    sybil New Member

    but i do not believe in god,another power,spiritual healing,or self help books.people who write these books are making money for peddling their own particular philosophy,which is fair enough if you believe it and it helps you.
    but as far as i'm concerned it wouldn't help me and i'm sure there are plenty of other people like me,whose only way to fight against this DD is to get doctors to give us the tests,drugs and therapies we need to treat us.
    i can't put my faith in a power which doesn't exist for me.the only way i can cope is the logical acceptance,that until science comes up with a cure,i'm more or less on my own.
    i don't want to go to a support group every week that is full of people talking about how ill they are,that won't help them and it won't help me.
    i depend on sheer tenacity to get through this,

    sybilxxx
  13. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Caroline Myss never says that working on our spirits will affect us physically. She says that some of the most enlightened continue to be sick and even die of their illnesses. That is their path. However, if we do not work on our spirits, we will not achieve lasting remission or cure. If we grow spiritually but do not achieve healing physically, our spiritual growth helps us to cope with our illnesses and see all of life in a new light.

    Sybil, I'm sorry you are not open to things spiritual because I do believe strongly in a mind/body/spirit connection. There have been so many spiritual things which have happened in my family which cannot be explained in a logical way. It just takes a leap of faith sometimes. God's magic is all around us if we choose to look, and when we look, we grow, and as we grow, our spirits are healed. I will be physically healed; I am already achieving some physical healing. If I am not completely physically healed, my spirit will help me cope with my illnesses.

    I have meditated on my chakras for years, along with Yoga and Tai Chi. I do not care for the manner in which Myss describes the chakras nor how she describes how to clear them. She neglects the "turning on" of the beautiful colors associated with each chakra. Done properly, opening the chakra column is a very energizing and spiritual experience.

    Love, Mikie
  14. JP

    JP New Member


    I appreciate your post. I consider myself agnostic, which is somewhat neutral to the whole conversation about god. I have grown to appreciate those who believe so strongly (as long as they are not pushy or abusive) and I accept their prayers as a gift of love. I suffered from religious abuse during my innocent years of youth. It sort of tainted the whole god conversation.

    Anyway, for whatever it's worth, I do believe that I have a spirit and I trust my path completely, for better or worse. It certainly helps me to cope and I am grateful for this belief that seems to be a part of me. The whole body/mind/spirit concept resonates with me, which is not god for me. I can't reach out and grab another's belief and call it my own, our beliefs live deep inside each of us and they are as unique and individual as we are. It's part of the mystery of the human experience. We are so complex...

    I have a passion toward exploring our mechanics through science. The more information I gather, the LESS I know. This is the gift of discovery for me...

    I respect your tenacity and have been known to be a little tenacious myself. These words are just my experience of life. If I bump into another who holds similar thoughts/beliefs, it's a bonus. I do not need even one other person to side with me, or believe the same, nor do I need to push my ideas on anyone, ever. I hope you see this note...feel free to email me at paufui@sonic.net

    One of my favorite statements is "take what you like and leave the rest."

    Be well,
    jan
  15. sybil

    sybil New Member

    or spiritual views.but they must respect that i don't share them.
    i also accept lots of unexplained things happen,but i don't believe these things have a spiritual basis.
    i grew up in a strongly roman catholic family.but as i grew up i wanted no part it and nothing will convince me otherwise.
    in my life i have had friends who have been jehovahs witnesses,muslims,hindus,protestant,catholics,buddhists and they have all respected my dislike of religion/spiritulism.we never discussed each others beliefs,we just accepted each other as individuals,

    sybilxxx

  16. Wuame

    Wuame New Member

    My FM (among other things) is rooted in Complex PTSD due to a childhood of being abused in multiple ways by multiple people. I was only FM dx'd 3 years ago, but I am now a big believer in the spirit-body connection & interaction.

    This may just be me, but when my body or spirit is hurting, the other one hurts; when one is feeling better thru proper care, the other tends to as well. Just not always at the same pace.

    Right now my body is running a bit behind my spirit. Yet I'm in much less pain than in a long time. Monday was the most painfree productive enjoyable day in since I can remember.

    I'm convinced my body is better becuz I've been doing a lot of spiritual work that has been very healing and I'm more relaxed, at peace with the world, and appreciative of myself. So now I'm also starting to work more on care of my body, which got somewhat neglected. Not so much becuz of all the focus on spiritual work but becuz its harder for me to do and i was coming off a down time.

    We're all different. Some would have more trouble with the spirit work. Some might not experience the effects of one on the other that much. All I know is my experience.

    No guarantee working on my spirit will make my body feel better. Or vice versa. But it sure doesn't hurt. At least somethings doing better.

    Wuame

    Wuame

  17. lucky

    lucky New Member

    I like to add some words and agree with you that spiritual healings can play a big role for some people. But, for people who are not going that route, I believe it is 'extra strength' which will enable us to cope with the daily battles of these illnesses and a proper support system as well which mostly is lacking. Kind regards, Lucky

  18. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Please do not think that I believe this is the only way to healing. It is just another path. Like everything else, it will work for some of us and for the rest, it may not.

    Like my Tai Chi, Yoga, Neurontin, or anything else, I wish everyone could benefit from it as I have. When I use the term, "Spirit," I am not thinking in terms of formal religion but rather of the universal energy which connects us all. To some of us that equates to God, but I understand and accept that is not necessarily true for everyone.

    My wish is that regardless of whatever paths we all choose to follow, they lead to healing in all areas of our lives.

    Love, Mikie