Words women use

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by tansy, Oct 28, 2007.

  1. tansy

    tansy New Member

    This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel
    they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe
    how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments.

    This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game
    is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.

    This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end
    with "Fine".

    GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows!)
    This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".

    GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows)
    This means "I give up" or "Do what you want because I don't care". You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you for about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

    This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

    Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.

    This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow".

    At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

    This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay".

    A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say "You're welcome."

    This is much different from "Thanks". A woman will say "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh". Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh" as she will only tell you "Nothing".

    [This Message was Edited on 10/28/2007]
  2. Khalyal

    Khalyal New Member

    My husband has just accused you of listening in on our conversations!

    Too funny!
  3. tansy

    tansy New Member

    We need REALLY MEANS I want

    You want REALLY MEANS You need

    It's your decision REALLY MEANS The correct decision should be obvious by now.

    We need to talk REALLY MEANS I need to complain

    Do what you want REALLY MEANS You'll pay for this later.

    You're ... so manly REALLY MEANS You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

    Sure... go ahead REALLY MEANS I don't want you to.

    I'm not upset REALLY MEANS Of course I'm upset, you moron!

    You're certainly attentive tonight. REALLY MEANS Is sex all you ever think about?

    I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! REALLY MEANS I'm on my period.

    Be romantic, turn out the lights. REALLY MEANS I'm Embarrassed

    This kitchen is so inconvenient REALLY MEANS I want a new house.

    You have to learn to communicate. REALLY MEANS Just agree with me.




    I heard a noise REALLY MEANS I noticed you were almost asleep.

    Do you love me? REALLY MEANS I'm going to ask for something expensive.

    How much do you love me? REALLY MEANS I did something you're not going to like.

    I'll be ready in a minute. REALLY MEANS Be patient I'll be a while.

    Am I a little fat? REALLY MEANS Tell me I'm beautiful.

    I'm sorry. REALLY MEANS You'll be sorry.

    Do you like this recipe? REALLY MEANS It's easy to fix, so get used to it.

    Was that the baby? REALLY MEANS Why don't you wake up and deal with the baby.

    I'm not yelling! REALLY MEANS Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.

    All we're going to buy is a soap dish REALLY MEANS Major shopping trip. Did you bring your checkbook?
  4. Missizzy

    Missizzy New Member

    Surely you can't mean me!!

  5. tansy

    tansy New Member

    surely not!

    I used to take a lot of live performance photographs; mostly musicians and comedians; so for years I got to see a lot of comedians.

    UK humour is often about laughing at ourselves; and the differences in the sexes was a popular subject for stand up comedy.

    One comdedian I saw was brilliant at observing common male/female traits and using anecdotes to make them brilliantly funny. The audience was as entertaining as the comedian; most were nodding in agreement and/or laughing at themselves. I did both.

    tc, Tansy
    [This Message was Edited on 03/24/2008]
  6. Doober

    Doober New Member

    These are not the only words my wife uses.

    I have a few more that she uses with me and I was going to add them here. But, we need to keep the language clean here......
  7. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    These are great!!!
  8. jasminetee

    jasminetee Member

    Those are so funny and they are too true...