Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by halle00, Mar 21, 2006.

  1. halle00

    halle00 New Member

    Im just wondering
    How many are working and running a house hold?

    How do you do it all??

    Some days Im ok and others I cant figure out how im going to make it threw the day?

    Anyone who works, how do you get leveled so you can work and not JUST work and sleep ??

  2. kaiasmom

    kaiasmom New Member

    And sometimes, I'm not sure how I do it myself!! It is not easy, that is for sure.

    I have to get me & the two kids ( 7 & 8) out the door by 7:30, drop them off at daycare, commute 30-45 minutes to work, put in a full day, commute 30-45 minutes home, pick up the kids from day care & start the evening routine.

    By the time we get home (5:15), I am totally exhausted & could just go to bed if that were an option. Since it isn't, I just keep on moving. First get the kids going on their homework while I figure out dinner & get it started. It's usually 6:30 or 7:00 by the time we're done eating, so then it's time for baths, reading & bed time. Oh, how I anticipate bed time each night!!!

    I put my kids to bed at 8:00 every night. This might sound early to some, but I have to get them up at 6:45, and even with bed time at 8, it can be hard to wake them up. They definitely need their rest!!

    So, at 8:00, I get my time to sit down & relax with my fiance. We usually just watch some TV, go on the computer or do nothing. Pretty brain dead by that time of the night!! Like I said, it is not easy, but for me there is no choice.

    I have to work, so we can have a place to live, cars to drive, food to eat, etc. We do not live an extravagant lifestyle that I am working to support. More like barely making enough to pay for what we need - not that we live in poverty or anything. I was raised with certain standards that I choose to uphold.

    One thing that I have just had to learn how to let go of is housework. My house is a complete disaster. I can't stand it, but I also can't clean it up. So, it stays a mess. I would say that has been one of the hardest adjustments I have made. My fiance is great about helping out, but he works full time too & he likes to play with the kids sometimes too!

    Just have to remember to keep your priorities in order. Make sure you're spending quality time with the people you love, and don't worry so much about everything else.

    Take care,

  3. RockiAZ

    RockiAZ New Member

    Halle - welcome aboard! You can read my bio to get more info, but in short I am now homebound and do my best to keep up with the house, shopping (hubby goes with or does it) cooking, etc. I HAVE to pace myself very sssslllooowwwllyyy in order to get things done. I only do what NEEDS to be done that day, but must admit some days I do way too much and pay for it. One day at a time girl. Just give it your best shot and don't give up hope.

    Leanne - HOLY cow woman! You wore me out reading your post ;)

    Live, Laugh, Love,
  4. loops1988

    loops1988 New Member

    my carrer started and ended in 6 months!

    i was told by my doctor that the reason i was so ill with colds and throat infections was because of me working (as well as pain and tierdness due to fms)
    i left work and was soon after told by the specialst it is unlikely i will ever be able to return to work.

    i get so board at home all the time but most of the time im too tired to notice.

    i miss not waking up and going to work and i miss the money i recieve dla and incapacity but because i am under 18 and live with my parents i get hardly anything, money comes in and its gone in a matter of hours with bills and board.

    right now i would love to have a child with my partner and move out and settle down but i have already disapointed my father who still moans i havnt got a carrer (he seems to think fms is just like a cold an ill get over it within days!)
    if i were to move out and settle down and have a child i will proably be disowned.

    anyway all i wish for my life now is to beable to cope with being a housewife in the future and maybe work part time (or as much as i can manage)

    as long as i could look after my children and look after my house and cook dinner for the family i will be satasfied.

    i suppose i would like to hold down a full time job but i just getting used to the fact its probably not going to happen (just hate being looked at as a school drop out that dosses and claims benifits)


  5. RockiAZ

    RockiAZ New Member

    Louise , I am so sorry to hear how young you are and to have this DD! I wish I had the right words to say to make you feel better, but please know that we are hear for you. Life happens. You never know what may be in your future. Please don't give up on your hopes and dreams and althought it gets hard, try to ignore the negative repsonses you hear. You can always vent to us.

    Big gentle hugs to you and everyone else!

    Live, Laugh, Love,
  6. loops1988

    loops1988 New Member

    this is someting i wouldnt EVER do, i have had so many friends and relatives that have took their lives and it just isnt an option for me.

    i will live till the day i die naturally even if that means being in pain all day every day.

    anyway ill live!!!

  7. halle00

    halle00 New Member

    Thank you all for your sweet replies and coments.

  8. dragon06

    dragon06 New Member

    I am no longer working and I don't do much around the house.

    Before this dd got real bad on me I used to work full-time and also run my own business...and now 2 years later I am mostly housebound. It's hard to take and I am still getting used to it.

    I still do work from home a little occaisionally doing transcription work. That's not very often though.

    My husband is a full time student and also works part time. I am not eligible for disability and we would be in really bad shape if it weren't for our 2 best friends. We all live together and they have been basically supporting us for the last 2 years while hubby finishes school. I don't know what we would do without them! He graduates in May and will get a job then so we can finally start to return the favor.

    I am lucky that everyone in my immediate life seems to understand what I go through, and if they can't understand they believe what I tell them when I tell them how I feel.

    I know my situation is rare and I am grateful for the people I have in my life.

    As far as handling things...I just do what I am able...I overdo it sometimes of course but I think it's impossible not to.
  9. matthewson

    matthewson New Member

    on whether you have FMS alone, or CFS or a combo. I only have FMS and am not particularly fatigued. The only problem I have is pain, and that is kept under control by my pain meds. So I am able to work part-time and do a few things around the house on my off days, but honestly, my house has never looked this BAD!!! Just can't keep up the pace I used to.

    Do you have CFS? That seems to be the main factor in not being able to work. I couldn't imagine being so fatigued like that! It would be impossible to work!

    Take care, Sally

    PITATOO Member

    I am a 43 yo male who has had CFIDS and FMS for over 10 years. I work fulltime, take care of my Father who is in the beginning stages of alheizmers. I am fortunate enough to have a housekeeper and cook. My children are grown. I know I could not clean and cook plus work - I know I could go on disability but could not handle staying home all day. I also own an antique shop so I like to keep busy - maybe too much sometimes. I also run a FMS/CFIDS support group. But I don't know how people do it with children at home. During the week all I really do is work and sleep. Doing just one extra thing during the week really takes it out of me. I start a workout plan with a personal trainer next Monday - we'll see how that goes. My job pays for it but you must go 3 times a week to get full reimbursement. - Fibro Hugs to all - Bobby
    [This Message was Edited on 03/23/2006]
  11. halle00

    halle00 New Member

    I was diagnosed with Fibro only. I do work full time, take care of our home, my son and husband.

    Some days I CAN do it all until the evening when i fall to bed early, other days I cant even blow dry my hair to get to work ( I usualy manage as its not a job I want to loose)

    I take vitamines, grape seed extract, and TRY to excercise. most days im so busy at work i just want to fall when i get home.
    any advice on what to do or take to help would be great

    [This Message was Edited on 03/23/2006]
  12. FoggyDayz

    FoggyDayz New Member

    I have been on short term disability since mid January and have to go back to work in a week and a half. Honestly, I am terrified of returning, but I need to bring in income and short term disability has cut me off; my doc thinks I should try go back, but my husband and I disagree.

    I have a 5 year old son who keeps me on my toes whether I want to be or not.

    My commute to work is over 50 miles one way and the drive alone kicks my butt - I am trying to find a job closer to home, but they are few and far between. I have told the doctor that I am scared to death of the commute alone as I have fallen asleep multiple times and have trouble focusing as well as I need to be - I worry about hurting others as much as I do myself.

    I guess I just keep pushing myself to do what I need to do, but I'm sure it's why I end up passing out and feeling much worse.

  13. halle00

    halle00 New Member

    I wish you all the luck going back to work
    take one day at a time ( as I do)
    I do feel your struggle
    its such a torn place to be when you need the income and have a job ............ but no energy to do it.

    XX fingers crossed you will do just great!

  14. loops1988

    loops1988 New Member

    hi sally,
    i like you have fms only and do not have the fatigue side (i dont think) i am always tired and often sleep during the day but i can stay awake if i have too.

    hi all:

    being on disability is helpful for me but not as much as i need. i have been told i can go back to work and still recieve my dla personal care and mobility (i am in uk so it may be diffrent for usa)
    as long as the social think that the work i am doing is acceptable i should not lose any of my money.
    BUT the doctor is not happy for me to go back to work even part time.

    I have days when i cant get in and out of the bath and i can hardly walk. I hope one day i will beable to at least have children and become a capable housewife.
    i help my mum around the house but this is only a matter of putting things away, washing up, loading the washing an drying machine and putting away clean clothes.

    i have a 2 year old neice i look after sometimes and she is great i can tell her i cant pick her up at times and she understands, i mainly take her swimming because this is fun for her and great for my body.