worried , atressed, overwhelmed

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by rosemarie, Aug 12, 2005.

  1. rosemarie

    rosemarie Member

    I am so upset these days, My husband is having a tough time with his work. He is under so much stress that most days I don't see him or he hides in his room watching TV till he can't standit anymore and then he try's to go to sleep, where instead he tosses and turns. HE has type 2 diebites and is now on isululin and other medications but his blood suger is aways too high. He is working 12 hours a day and we are in so much debt that he cant' quit this job that is the cause of his stress. I am so afraid that I am going to lose my husband.

    I have fibro ,2 discs that are bulging and degenetative disc diease, arthritis in both knees and arthrithis in my left wirst that I shattered last year and still hurts as much as the rest of this pain issue. I am on MScontin and MSIR for pain and soma for the muscle spasms. I have good and bad days I am always sleepy . And I don't even take all my meds in a day that I am allowed to take.

    MY daughters don't "understand" any thing that has to do with my taking pain meds since I have been on pain meds for most of my life . IN my marriage it started with female problems and it stayed that was every month I was in so much pain that I would end up taking T3's or I would end up in surgery . So my girls think that I should noth ave pain now as I had a total abdomaial hyesterecetomy incluiding tues and cervix and appendiix. I have since had a bladdler repair and fied the other things that were problems for me.

    My girls think that beause I wsa on pain meds while they were growing up that i am addicted tothem and because I sleep or feel s;eepy all day I am addicted. I am allowed to take up to 5 100 mg MScontin a day and most days i take 2-3 pilss in a day. There was a time when I took all 5 of them but them I shattered my wirst and the painwas winning so I have trhied to do other things to help ease this pain that never leaves me alone. I want my girls to know that I have real pain and that it has nothing to do with the pain meds I took back when they were young. I am a different person than I was them or even 3 years ago.

    NOw I am juststressed and worried that things in my life are not going well. I am so worried about my husabnad and my grils are not hpapy witheach other one is getting married in a few weeks and she expects that her dad and I will help her pay for things like we did her youngest sister a year ago. The problem is she did not tell us that she was getting married till 2and a half months before she is. Before whew had 6 months to save up some omoney to help the younegest out and she was living at home and was just 19, had a low paying job and paid for her own wedding dress veil and slip. this daughter that is getting married is 27 and lives with my mom and has fowrked for the state for 6 years and her fieance works also and he is 32. I would help out so much but I am not able to work and have not worked in three years.

    I am sorry if I am not making sence with this post I just don't know how to handle all of this stress and worry I can't change a thing and I can't ease the pain that my husband feels either, He dose not really understand what I hvae in fibro and that it is real and I amnot makeing it up as he feels I am doing. becasue ONe time I have energy and the next moment I don't . so becasssse of that I am faking it.

    Sorry I am bothering you just needed to vent a minute Rosemaire

  2. naturebaby

    naturebaby New Member

    We here on the board DO believe you. It must be so stressful for you not to have that kind of support at home. So believe me, you are not bothering us, we are here for you!

    As for the upcoming wedding, you can only do what you can do. Take care of yourself first. If you really feel that you must contribute "to be fair", then explain that you had time to save and that your financial circumstances were different for the other daughter's wedding. And postpone the giving until you are in a position to do it without jeopardizing you and hubby's finances. If she's 27, she ought to understand.

    You go right ahead and take your pain meds just as your doctor has prescribed. Unless someone in your family has a medical degree, they don't have any authority or knowledge to tell you any different.

    Take care and keep us posted! Wishing you well, nature
  3. PVLady

    PVLady New Member

    First of all, we can only take one day at a time to solve our problems.

    It may sound shocking but I would consider filing bankruptcy if it is feasible. If the debt is so bad it is making him sick, only you can make that decision - or you might consider a "reorganization" to take the pressure off.

    If you own your home, you could see if he can take out a second mortgage to pay off all the bills and increase your cash flow.

    Also, if possible, make sure he is seeing the very best doctor you can find, and that he following the orders. Diabetes can be managed.

    It might not be so bad that he is hiding in his room watching TV - maybe it is his way to relax and really rest.

    Take care

    [This Message was Edited on 08/12/2005]